Interviewing Morrissey

[Aubrey McFate]

Morrissey, in recent years, has not shown a willingness to sit for interviewers with non-sycophants. I believe he has restricted himself to Fiona Dodwell, his nephew, and an alleged fanzine editor, John Riggers. Was the Der Spiegel interview the last one outside of the circle?

Perhaps Capitol Records will ask him to do interviews to promote the new record. If you were permitted to put five interview questions to Morrissey, what would they be?

Mine:

1. Your new record features Flea and Chad Smith, members of the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and Josh Klinghoffer, a former Red Hot Chili Pepper. Jesse Tobias was briefly a Red Hot Chili Pepper. What's your opinion of the Red Hot Chili Peppers, musically and as people?

2. On your website, the Messages from Morrissey routinely feature alt-right opinionistas. One of them is Paul Joseph Watson, who is well-known for mocking vegans. Some of the others are Trumpkins, or hold revanchist views on women and homosexuality. Why is this so?

3. Describe Miley Cyrus.

4. You twice worked with Jerry Finn, the producer for Blink-182 and Sum 41, and you duetted with Billie Joe Armstrong of Green Day, and you attended an Authority Zero concert this year. Do you enjoy that genre?

5. What were the best books you read this year?

 

[ZOOM FROM GLOOM]

Morrissey, in recent years, has not shown a willingness to sit for interviewers with non-sycophants. I believe he has restricted himself to Fiona Dodwell, his nephew, and an alleged fanzine editor, John Riggers. Was the Der Spiegel interview the last one outside of the circle?

Perhaps Capital Records will ask him to do interviews to promote the new record. If you were permitted to put five interview questions to Morrissey, what would they be?

Mine:

1. Your new record features Flea and Chad Smith, members of the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and Josh Klinghoffer, a former Red Hot Chili Pepper. Jesse Tobias was briefly a Red Hot Chili Pepper. What's your opinion of the Red Hot Chili Peppers, musically and as people?

I’m not really too familiar with their music, I just gave Andrew the tapes to see what they can do with them, and what I heard back was
quite exciting, and they’re a sweet bunch, so why not?

2. On your website, the Messages from Morrissey routinely feature alt-right opinionistas. One of them is Paul Joseph Watson, who is well-known for mocking vegans. Some of the others are Trumpkins, or hold revanchist views on women and homosexuality. Why is this so?

Do they ? I haven’t looked into it. It’s interesting though, so few speak their minds these days, nor do they dare say anything nice about me, and to the ones that do? I’m forever grateful.

3. Describe Miley Cyrus.

Well, she’s about this tall and … actually she just popped in one day and gave a wonderful performance, just what Veronica needed. Plus she works cheap.

4. You twice worked with Jerry Finn, the producer for Blink-182 and Sum 41, and you duetted with Billie Joe Armstrong of Green Day, and you attended an Authority Zero concert this year. Do you enjoy that genre?

Some may not believe this, and still picture me spending my days under a pile of books in some darkened corner of a room. But the truth is, I do actually like to get out some time, breath in the good air and take in a show, a few people on stage with real instruments playing and singing their hearts out, which is really a dying art form, don’t you agree?

5. What were the best books you read this year?

I haven’t read any! I’ve been too busy going out and watching bands like Authority Zero.

 

[Gregor Samsa]

Mine:

1. What are your top 5 Elvis Presley songs?
2. Why those five songs?
3. What's the greatest thing about Elvis Presley?
4. If you could spend one hour with Presley and Frank Sinatra, what would you talk about?
5. Why do you repost articles and videos by alt-right trolls on your website and how can you not understand that it is sabotaging your career?

 

[Gregor Samsa]

Also, Ketamine Sun pretending to be Morrissey is probably...more than I can take.

 

[Gregor Samsa]

what? You can’t take a joke? Lol

Some good questions GS, but seriously though, you two are posting questions that you know he wouldn’t answer, and probably one of the reasons why he won’t do interviews anymore. Not that I blame you for asking.

Can you?

Sure, but one can dream, right? It's not like we are submitting these questions to M himself.

 

[Gregor Samsa]

Oh I’m sorry I didn’t know you and Aubrey were joking.


Of course. But where am I stopping you from dreaming? I did say, I didn’t blame you for asking such questions.

You seem to not understand. Let me break it down for you, so that there can be no more misunderstandings, deliberate or otherwise:
1. You answered Aubrey's interview questions "as" Morrissey
2. I jokingly commented on that, saying it was more than I could take
3. You highlighted that in bold letters when you quoted me, asking if I couldn't take a joke
4. I replied to that specifically, asking you the same question (in other words, me saying you "pretending to be" Moz was more than I could take was a joke)

Not sure you're stopping us from dreaming, but you still felt the need to point out that our questions are questions he normally wouldn't answer - as if we didn't know, as if that would be relevant, as if we actually were (thinking of) submitting them to Moz. The whole idea was to dream up our favorite stuff to ask him (or so I thought).

 

[ZOOM FROM GLOOM]

You seem to not understand. Let me break it down for you, so that there can be no more misunderstandings, deliberate or otherwise:
1. You answered Aubrey's interview questions "as" Morrissey

Yes as a joke.

2. I jokingly commented on that, saying it was more than I could take

Though I thought your comment funny, and rated it as such, I didn’t know you were joking.

3. You highlighted that in bold letters when you quoted me, asking if I couldn't take a joke

Yeah, because I thought you thought my first post was serious.

4. I replied to that specifically, asking you the same question (in other words, me saying you "pretending to be" Moz was more than I could take was a joke)

ok.

Not sure you're stopping us from dreaming, but you still felt the need to point out that our questions are questions he normally wouldn't answer - as if we didn't know, as if that would be relevant, as if we actually were (thinking of) submitting them to Moz. The whole idea was to dream up our favorite stuff to ask him (or so I thought).

Yeah sure, dream away.

But questions like that are also reminding us probably why he hasn’t been doing interviews, and I don’t see the fun in that.

 

[Gregor Samsa]

But questions like that are also reminding us probably why he hasn’t been doing interviews, and I don’t see the fun in that.

I certainly don't see the harm in posting questions like that amongst ourselves on this message board. It's the stuff we want to see in an interview.

What five questions would you ask him in an interview?

 

[ZOOM FROM GLOOM]

I certainly don't see the harm in posting questions like that amongst ourselves on this message board. It's the stuff we want to see in an interview.

I didn’t say there was harm in it. Even in my dream interview I know there’s questions he wouldn’t answer, so why bother.

What five questions would you ask him in an interview?

Well, it would then have to be a private interview.

 

[Aubrey McFate]

Well, it would then have to be a private interview.

Ooh la la!

 

[ZOOM FROM GLOOM]

Mine:

1. What are your top 5 Elvis Presley songs?

(Such an) easy question.
I want you, I need you, I love you.
Night Rider.
Doing the best I can.
Yoga is as yoga does.

2. Why those five songs?

Why not? There’s really too many to choose from, don’t you agree?

3. What's the greatest thing about Elvis Presley?

His natural blond hair.

4. If you could spend one hour with Presley and Frank Sinatra, what would you talk about?

What do they gargle with?

5. Why do you repost articles and videos by alt-right trolls on your website and how can you not understand that it is sabotaging your career?

It’s not really a career, it’s more of a divine calling, that I put up with.

 

[Dirk Blaggard]

" and an alleged fanzine editor, John Riggers."
LOL

How about this, "M you are a clever boy John Riggers, Sam, Fiona they are there just to forward your own views. You must know
nobody falls for it why not grow a pair and do your own blog. You have a great mind. You have good interesting views. why not let the people hear them. Check Quentin Taratno's blogs on film, you could do that on life"

 

[ZOOM FROM GLOOM]

Yes, I could do that on life.

 

[Aubrey McFate]

At this point, we're interviewing "Morrissey."

 

[Gregor Samsa]

We must assume that finally becoming Morrissey was Ketamine’s ultimate goal all along. It makes perfect sense.

 

[ZOOM FROM GLOOM]

We must assume that finally becoming Morrissey was Ketamine’s ultimate goal all along. It makes perfect sense.

any more questions for “Morrissey”?

 

[Aubrey McFate]

any more questions for “Morrissey”?

I should've asked about the death of Queen Elizabeth.

 

[ZOOM FROM GLOOM]

I should've asked about the death of Queen Elizabeth.

Well, I’m not a monster, I do respect the passing of another human being, but the passing of the monarchy itself can not come soon enough.

 

[snoddywilko]

I only have one question:

You once stated something along the lines of you not being a fan of The Beatles but they did write 4 exceptional songs & that’s enough to make their existence worthwhile.

Which 4 songs were you referring to?

 

[Phranc & Open]

https://i.gifer.com/4pbo.gif