Symbolic Stuff Nobody Gives a Crap About

[CrystalGeezer]

At one point today and yesterday he kept saying "You want to make it my fault." the "it" so inconsequential I can't even remember what it was, and he wouldn't let it go...my rational brain was thinking "WTF is he talking about? I literally have no idea why he thinks fault is even an issue?" It was tense, there were children crying around us, I was just trying to remain calm and focused.

Meanwhile in a round building in the ugly part of Hollywood...

One door closes, you open another. NBD.

 

[123xyz]

Rest in peace, baby bird.

Sorry to hear of it , CG. It's commendable that you took him in ...

 

[CrystalGeezer]

Sorry to hear of it , CG. It's commendable that you took him in ...

He didn't look comfortable in his body. I wanted him to die with dignity though, not homeless on a sidewalk crying for help.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

With a day to recover and reassess, weather vane was like my Colonel Parker. He knew EVERYTHING. And wanted to control EVERYTHING. And to suggest something different or do something different than his suggestion (that was often cryptic and you had to guess what he was saying) is to oppose him which lead to abuse. Escaped that this trip, somehow. Got some old school drama though. Shivers at the memory of that. Every day a power play if you didn't participate in his fantasy he directed. Never again.

In this body the Elvis in me in wiser.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

I wonder if weathervane is like the tortured living speakerphone for the mentally distressed. I asked him Sunday about suicide, if he was contemplating it. All weekend was stories reflecting on how good life used to be and dreams of better things and how everything is failing him and who is to blame and who is at fault and...

 

[CrystalGeezer]

f***.

For three solid days I whispered to a baby bird that he didn't have to live, that it was okay to die and let go, he'd feel better.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

 

[Deleted member 1074]

f***.

For three solid days I whispered to a baby bird that he didn't have to live, that it was okay to die and let go, he'd feel better.

That's some sick shit right there...
I bet you'd probably wander into St. Jude's and do the same.

 

[Skylarker]

f***.

For three solid days I whispered to a baby bird that he didn't have to live, that it was okay to die and let go, he'd feel better.

It probably just needed some bread.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

This is when the insults on the mainpage come in handy. Read the real green (not fake green) on the Harvest thread to see who was the fish and who was the dog. He was on a chain which alludes to The Devil card. The fish could be "selfish" or insults alluding to sperm like blow jobs or whatever...anyway. I'm at work so I can't look now, but you'll see one of the haters "set" up your signature. I don't know how old that video is though, it seems like it was yesterday but it could be 2 years old. I think it's new though, there's this trend of animals rising up and teaching us lessons. Bears saving birds drowning in the zoo, a moose or caribou or something saved a small mammal from drowning in it's watering tank. It's a trend. I think these are our movies.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

So the first time I worked here as the temporary manager, Morrissey had just wrapped up YOR. The manager I replaced was moving to another complex and asked if I wanted one of his canaries who I named Jose but who I randomly kept calling Jerry for some reason, the name Jerry stuck. So this time Morrissey wraps up WPINOYB and a cat enters my life who I name Jolene after a Dolly Parton song. But I call her Joe.

Why am I naming my pets after his album producers?

 

[CrystalGeezer]

I'm sorta ignoring the Ferguson, St Louis, death of the namesake of our angel/istanbul drama because it has too many symbolic triggers I'm tired of processing. Or are a trick to endorse the relevancy of something OLD and not relevant. That's probably stupid, I should follow it. Like I should look at those three videos, I should read Autobiography, I should...I'm just weirdly exhausted.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

On the subject of new dog/old tricks, Vane is up to his typical shit. Making a list of complaints of how I ruined his weekend (one of the items being the seat in the car wasn't raised up to a level he found comfortable, I should have accounted for that and apprently he is not able to crank a dial to raise his own f***ing seat, so I ruined the weekend.) It is now my job to PITY him and make promises as to how I will provide for his comfort and happiness in the future, and I should admit to his generalization that I am not a nice person while he is (as evidenced by the things he buys for me and other people) and I need to ADDRESS these pressing issues and make amends with the beast that is his intricate fantasy. Ugghhhhhh. It makes me think f*** SYMBOLS. But I know the vessel's flaws can taint the good water that flows from it, his ideas are not all crazy just because he is. So a continue quiet symbolic quest, it aint easy after what I witnessed for four days. He's f***ing nuts.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

I have a business transaction happening that's filling me with so much guilt (though I have zero reason to feel it other than moral compass issues) that I am drawing stupid, semi-hysterical conclusions and freaking out my associates. I need to just calm the f*** down, guilt is a strong and powerful emotion. I think it's the devil's free pass card, instilling guilt in those from whom he wants something.

My brain keeps telling me I'm a horrible person and it's making me get all paranoid and defensive. Today at the store God was like, "Amie! FFS get your shit together, I've got your back! Jesus!" Lol.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

Colossus closes tomorrow. It's like the signaling of the end of an era. Rickety, wooden and old school with little to none neck support and no loops, it'll probably be replaced with another one of those slick, speakers in your ears, faster, faster, faster coasters that leaves nothing to the imagination.

http://la.curbed.com/archives/2014/08/take_one_last_backwards_ride_on_closing_colossus_c oaster.php

I've probably been on this coaster 50 times. Or more. The line was always short because there were more thrilling coasters the teenagers prefer, so the socal kids go on it over and over as their sort of "breaking-in" coaster. It's still an excellent ride and longer than most coasters.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

Paul McCartney shut down Candlestick Park tonight. Ladies have been jerking to candles since the dawn of time, I hope it's a sign I'll be getting laid one of these days.

 

[MozRecording]

Paul McCartney shut down Candlestick Park tonight. Ladies have been jerking to candles since the dawn of time, I hope it's a sign I'll be getting laid one of these days.

Last night actually.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

Last night actually.

Oh, I guess my facebook friends waited til they got home to their wifi to upload all the video.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

This is probably great.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

In 24 hours after a ton of work is wrapped up, the Lanos will be pointed north, Barney in the backseat, bound for two nights of central coast pacific ocean zen out with one of my first meditation bands. I think I'll skip Visalia, I don't want to seem like a stalker.

http://wireless2.fcc.gov/UlsApp/Uls...1542658410!-256058478?licKey=549854&printable