speedway?

[Little Miss Guided]

Bigamy is having one husband too many - Monogamy is the same.

> Ok, whomsoever sees it first gets 10p. Though I must warn you
> I'm liable to cheat and poke you in the eyes!

Naughty! Will you/I be paying by cheque or postal order?

> Pounds?! Well what the hooliehoo are you playing around at,
> "want, take, have"! I'd say introduce me, but for the
> fact that I'm terribly head over heels in love.

Who's this then? You mean there's someone else? Shock! Gasp! So this is how it is then..leading me along when you KNOW you've got someone at home...I think that's just plain...cheeky.

> Oh yes, it's an absolute historical FACT that every single
> pharaoh was entombed with mummified Jam sarnies! And there's no
> doubt about it.

Yes...jam sarnies and Capri-Suns. Could you ever peirce those little bastards with those little yellow straws?

> I will decline politely if you don't mind...(I mean, stale
> battenberg, maybe. But kitkats are so shcool packed lunch! And
> 20p!! Bit steep in't it?!

You don't know what you're missing...some weeks we get those little chocolate and jam marshmallows. But the drawback is, the old woman who serves it smells of wee.

> You will. And when they do that thing they do, don't you come
> crying to me!

What thing? Form their Barbershop quartet?

LMT

 

[Cinderella]

Re: He lost his mind and I lost my knickers!

> Naughty! Will you/I be paying by cheque or postal order?

I was thinking internet banking...that way we can just transfer it directly from one to the other. I feel much more comfortable handling such large sums of money this way.

> Who's this then? You mean there's someone else? Shock! Gasp! So
> this is how it is then..leading me along when you KNOW you've
> got someone at home...I think that's just plain...cheeky.

Why it's YOU, my darling I cannot help it...the way you drive me insane over idiots such as that wretch Mr. Higginsberg or whatever Mr. "I'm new to the area, care to make me feel welcome?" is called! You are just too nice for your own good! besides we could all move to utah and get polygamous or something?! But who the hooliegoolies will bring the chickens?

> Yes...jam sarnies and Capri-Suns. Could you ever peirce those
> little bastards with those little yellow straws?

After stabbing myself several times over, then accidentally squeezing whilst piercing and bathing in the fruity goodness, yes.

> You don't know what you're missing...some weeks we get those
> little chocolate and jam marshmallows. But the drawback is, the
> old woman who serves it smells of wee.

Whats wrong with that then?

> What thing? Form their Barbershop quartet?

No. You know THAT thing?!

C x

 

[Cinderella]

Re: This to me is funny!

What's the difference between a fox and a dog? About 10 pints...

 

[Cinderella]

Re: Watch less TV

oopsie...here we go again!

 

[Little Miss Labels]

Which character does Seth Green play?

> I was thinking internet banking...that way we can just transfer
> it directly from one to the other. I feel much more comfortable
> handling such large sums of money this way.

Yes, I agree. 10p is a large sum of money.

> Why it's YOU, my darling I cannot help it...the way you drive me
> insane over idiots such as that wretch Mr. Higginsberg or
> whatever Mr. "I'm new to the area, care to make me feel
> welcome?" is called! You are just too nice for your own
> good! besides we could all move to utah and get polygamous or
> something?! But who the hooliegoolies will bring the chickens?

Well EXCUUUUSE MEEEE! for making OUR neighbours feel welcome! I suppose YOU don't know that Master Higginsberg let's me borrow a cup of sugar whenever I want...and his lingerie...maybe it is a few sizes too big but it's the thought that counts...

> After stabbing myself several times over, then accidentally
> squeezing whilst piercing and bathing in the fruity goodness,
> yes.

Mmm. The fruity goodness. Like Um Bongo. Do Yanks have Um Bongo?

> Whats wrong with that then?

I can never decide whether to give her money or place a urinal cake in her hat.

> No. You know THAT thing?!

Nope, I don't then. Enlighten me.

 

[Little Miss Curious]

Re: This to me is also funny!

I saw his name first...you owe me 10p.

Hand it over.

LMC x

 

[Cinderella]

Re: This to me is also funny!

> I saw his name first...you owe me 10p.

> Hand it over.

> LMC x

Did not...do not.

Shan't!

Now gimme yer money.

 

[Cinderella]

Re: chocolate coated urinal cakes.

> Yes, I agree. 10p is a large sum of money.

> Well EXCUUUUSE MEEEE! for making OUR neighbours feel welcome! I
> suppose YOU don't know that Master Higginsberg let's me borrow a
> cup of sugar whenever I want... and his lingerie...maybe it is
> a few sizes too big but it's the thought that counts...

I bet he does the dirty bastard! And I suppose my sugar just isn't good enough for you now is it little miss excuses?!

> Mmm. The fruity goodness. Like Um Bongo. Do Yanks have Um Bongo?

I don't know, I shall have to enquire. But ooooooooo um bongo...they drink it in the congo...And I just LOVE it, in fact I am seriously thinking of running off and marrying it!

> I can never decide whether to give her money or place a urinal
> cake in her hat.

Na, just buy her some fbreeze this christmas.

> Nope, I don't then. Enlighten me.

For god sakes woman...THEY JUMP!!

 

[Little Miss Repressed (but I'm remarkably dressed)]

Re: chocolate coated urinal cakes.

> I bet he does the dirty bastard! And I suppose my sugar just
> isn't good enough for you now is it little miss excuses?!

Not if it's that turdy Canderel stuff, NO IT ISN'T.

> I don't know, I shall have to enquire. But ooooooooo um
> bongo...they drink it in the congo...And I just LOVE it, in fact
> I am seriously thinking of running off and marrying it!

But for some reason ever since they started using yellow straws instead of the white-with-red-striped ones the smell of it makes me vomit..

> Na, just buy her some fbreeze this christmas.

But where do I suggest that she sprays it?!

> For god sakes woman...THEY JUMP!!

OHHHH...when you said 'That thing they do' I thought you meant form a band and make a truly atrocious film to boot. Starring Tom Hanks.

Nicholas has been evicted OHHHHHHHH! But boo at the same time...

Oh WHY must I watch Family Fortunes! It incites murder within mee.

LMR(BIRD) x

 

[Little Miss Repressed (but I'm remarkably dressed)]

Re: This to me is also funny!

> Did not...do not.

> Shan't!

> Now gimme yer money.

A farthing and that's my final offer.

LMR..x

 

[Cinderella]

Re: pants are NOT trousers!

> Not if it's that turdy Canderel stuff, NO IT ISN'T.

Canderel...wash out your unholy mouth my dear and never EVER mention that filth near me AGAIN! I adore sugar...

> But for some reason ever since they started using yellow straws
> instead of the white-with-red-striped ones the smell of it makes
> me vomit..

I've never had one with a yellow straw...I get the ones with the red purple and white striped straws...maybe that's some bizarre Halifax thing?!

> But where do I suggest that she sprays it?!

Anywhere and everywhere. Alternatively spray it all over her yourself...after all it IS for things you can't exactly take to the cleaners or get in the washing machine!

> OHHHH...when you said 'That thing they do' I thought you meant
> form a band and make a truly atrocious film to boot. Starring
> Tom Hanks.

Ah, well, yes...you see, they start off jumping, but where this leads to nobody can say! (Oh and BTW, with those buggers it'd more likely be Jean Claude Van Damme eek!)

> Nicholas has been evicted OHHHHHHHH! But boo at the same time...

Who's Nicholas?

> Oh WHY must I watch Family Fortunes! It incites murder within
> mee.

You too!!!

Cinders x

 

[Little Miss Repressed (but I'm remarkably dressed)]

Agggghh! 'Tonight' in on with Jane McDonald AGAIN!!

> Canderel...wash out your unholy mouth my dear and never EVER
> mention that filth near me AGAIN! I adore sugar...

Mmm...sugarlumps are best! When you pop them in your mouth and let them melt on your tongue...and your teeth start crying as the acid works on your cavities...oh the fun..

> I've never had one with a yellow straw...I get the ones with the
> red purple and white striped straws...maybe that's some bizarre
> Halifax thing?!

Possibly. Maybe they spiked the Halifax Um Bongos with poison, to cull us all, and to mark this they put yellow straws in them. Bastards.

> Anywhere and everywhere. Alternatively spray it all over her
> yourself...after all it IS for things you can't exactly take to
> the cleaners or get in the washing machine!

Yeah, but she really needs it spraying on her...ahem. Cough.

> Ah, well, yes...you see, they start off jumping, but where this
> leads to nobody can say! (Oh and BTW, with those buggers it'd
> more likely be Jean Claude Van Damme eek!)

Ooh, I can say. I've ben watching them...and it ain't a preddee sight..

Did you watch Family Guy? Hmm?

> Who's Nicholas?

You know, Big Brother? Don't you?

> You too!!!

Of course.

LMR x

 

[Cinderella]

Re: ...but such a charming smile, that it's alright with me.

> Mmm...sugarlumps are best! When you pop them in your mouth and
> let them melt on your tongue...and your teeth start crying as
> the acid works on your cavities...oh the fun..

Absolutely. But the real question here is: white or brown!

> Possibly. Maybe they spiked the Halifax Um Bongos with poison,
> to cull us all, and to mark this they put yellow straws in them.
> Bastards.

Maybe, but me's thinkin' the straw change in colour for the poisoned ones is kind of a big give away (that is, to those of us who are pre-labotomy)

> Yeah, but she really needs it spraying on her...ahem. Cough.

A bucket of bleach then?! Laughing or take in an industrial sized hose and blast the wee-woman with that...think - 'subtle hints'!

> Ooh, I can say. I've ben watching them...and it ain't a preddee
> sight..

They look soooooo slimy, and yet, when you pick them up...THEY AREN'T!!! So what's that all about, hmmn? Come on, quickly, I need to know so I can tell the toads.

> Did you watch Family Guy? Hmm?

I did! Though I must confess I missed quite a bit at the beginning..(Elvis caught a butterfly and I had to get it off him and set it free...and battling with a determined and wriggling puddy cat and a fluttery butterfly can be quite a time consuming performance. Stupid butterfly, should have been in bed long before that time, the dirty stop out!)

> You know, Big Brother? Don't you?

The programme? If so, no, I haven't been watching that.

Love from me (and the lovely Les Dennis) xx

 

[Little Miss Tired]

Re: ...but such a charming smile, that it's alright with me.

I shall write tomorrow when I am less drunken so I can switch my brain into an amusing mode - at the moment, it is dying.

Oh why must I feel so crappy?

LMT x

> Absolutely. But the real question here is: white or brown!

> Maybe, but me's thinkin' the straw change in colour for the
> poisoned ones is kind of a big give away (that is, to those of
> us who are pre-labotomy)

> A bucket of bleach then?! Laughing or take in an industrial
> sized hose and blast the wee-woman with that...think - 'subtle
> hints'!

> They look soooooo slimy, and yet, when you pick them up...THEY
> AREN'T!!! So what's that all about, hmmn? Come on, quickly, I
> need to know so I can tell the toads.

> I did! Though I must confess I missed quite a bit at the
> beginning..(Elvis caught a butterfly and I had to get it off him
> and set it free...and battling with a determined and wriggling
> puddy cat and a fluttery butterfly can be quite a time consuming
> performance. Stupid butterfly, should have been in bed long
> before that time, the dirty stop out!)

> The programme? If so, no, I haven't been watching that.

> Love from me (and the lovely Les Dennis) xx

 

[Cinderella]

Re: Stevie Nicks...well don't invite her round to your house then!

> Oh why must I feel so crappy?

Quite simply; because you are a drunken lout!

Alcohol's a depressant, give it up and indulge in violent sports instead...not gurlie excersise classes...bleh! (Yeepers the music, and I use the term loosely, they play...euyak!)

Then you get to be really strong, you look good and you just can't beat the endorphine rush...well, you can, but I find I generally need greasetea to be around to help me with that..

Aww, poor babes...eat lots of bananas, the potassium in them stimulates seratonin production in your brain and helps make you feel all swimmy again! Alternatively try taking a combination of valium and amphetamines?!

...Having said all of that, I'm now off for a beer

Cinders X

 

[Little Miss Naughty]

Steamy Nicks.

> Quite simply; because you are a drunken lout!

Too true, but only at the weekend...

> Alcohol's a depressant, give it up and indulge in violent sports
> instead...not gurlie excersise classes...bleh! (Yeepers the
> music, and I use the term loosely, they play...euyak!)

Violent sports? Gurlee exercise classes? No no no no thanks! Hmm...I get enough exercise typing and moving this mouse about thank you very much! His name's Derek.
.
> Then you get to be really strong, you look good and you just
> can't beat the endorphine rush...well, you can, but I find I
> generally need greasetea to be around to help me with that..

I am as weak as a kitten. I think I always will be. What's Greasetea's number?

> Aww, poor babes...eat lots of bananas, the potassium in them
> stimulates seratonin production in your brain and helps make you
> feel all swimmy again! Alternatively try taking a combination of
> valium and amphetamines?!

Okay. They're good for you anyway. How much valium do I need then?

> ...Having said all of that, I'm now off for a beer

Naughty Cinds.

LMN x

 

[Cinderella]

Re: Oooo look at the cheeky mouse!

wiggly bum...

 

[Little Miss Naughty]

Is this a fly or a bird?

I can't decide...

LMN x

 

[Cinderella]

Re: Is this a fly or a bird?

Well, if you have gone completely mad and lost all capacity for intelligence...then I shall point out it is a cat.

Otherwise, I would have to say it's an insect (a flying one of course). See is it was a bird I think it'd be bigger...and...it's flying too low around the cat to be a bird.

Well there you have my considered opinion...and I spend a lot of time thinking about cats.

 

[Cinderella]

Re: No Nicks.

> Too true, but only at the weekend...

> Violent sports? Gurlee exercise classes? No no no no thanks!
> Hmm...I get enough exercise typing and moving this mouse about
> thank you very much! His name's Derek.

Hello Derek!
And poor you, you must be exhausted after a work out like that!

> I am as weak as a kitten. I think I always will be. What's
> Greasetea's number?

Not telling, he's mine all mine!

> Okay. They're good for you anyway. How much valium do I need
> then?

Not really sure...

> Naughty Cinds.

As ever...