Worst Michael Jackson Single

Light Housework

spare themselves their impossible fake standards
Anyway, I told myself I'd paint some Baz's Tongue at midnight, and it's now past 1, so I'm going to try to paint now. Thanks for chatting Dave. Have a great night.
 

rifke

18% descended from the great teutonic tribes
lol
 

Fake C

Measured, Found Wanting
I guess learn to gaslight better and don't do it to someone that has just specifically told you exactly what you're trying to do.
 

Fake C

Measured, Found Wanting
Unless you think they're dumb and you're pretty good at it. Unfortunately those are both false assumptions.
 

rifke

18% descended from the great teutonic tribes
theres a woman at work who always says "army fail" instead of "fail army" (which i couldnt imagine saying as it is). i get so embarrassed for her every time.
 

sea salt

I read books, I drink wine and I know things
dave is a harsh mistress :fearscream:

One thing I've been finding rather fascinating (and slightly amusing) for some time now is how LH has been latching on to "Dave", clinging to every word he says, desperate for him to *like* her posts ... while he has been nothing but a snide, patronising cυnt.

The amount of dysfunction and co-dependency in these interactions is staggering.
 

Aubrey McFate

Lonely in Barcelona
I don’t think he has mentioned Michael even once. He has mentioned Janet and also said something along the lines of “various other Jackson family members”.
I do agree that Prince is overrated. There has always been a rivalry between him and Mike, and ever since he (P) died and Mike was once again dragged through the mud (this time under the ugly guise of MeToo), he really has been obscenely overrated. Especially among white alternative rock fans who are desperate to appear cool and in touch with black music, while at the same time virtue-signaling and appearing PC by choosing Prince instead of Mike.
Of course he was talented, but at the same time he was limited. He didn’t have that much to say, lyrically, and even though he was a proficient musician, he really doesn’t have that many enduring compositions to his name. Luckily for him, he often hid behind masturbatory funk, especially in his later years.

Michael on the other hand deserves all the praise he has ever gotten. A formidable talent, who could just as easily write sweaty funk as he could sultry r’n’b, goosebumps-inducing soul or exhilarating pop songs sticky as gum. Not to mention he was the best dancer since Astaire and a singer with a powerful, multifaceted voice everyone could recognize at any given moment.

I may've subconsciously lumped his slagging off of Janet Jackson into a slagging off of her brother, @Gregor Samsa. I'm glad it was Janet, though; she deserves the more opprobrium. I would have to consider her the 80s artist I hate the most. There's not a single song of hers I don't consider to be a serious degree of awful. The style was called "New Jack Swing," and it has to be one of the worst musical styles I've ever heard. The keyboards are like clinking factory noises and breaking glass.

I agree on certain points about Michael Jackson. He was a good dancer, but most dancing is pretty comical. The iconic image of Michael Jackson I like to keep is that video scene where it's a typical 80s late-night milieu, with steam oozing out of the grates on rain-slicked city streets. He's in his standard MJ uniform and a beautiful girl passes him on the sidewalk. He screams "hey!" She turns around, he does a quick little shimmy dance, grabs his crotch, tips the brim of his hat, points at her and shrieks, "you knock me offa my feet now, baby—HOO!" and his falsetto shatters the glass of the nearby windows. That's Michael Jackson in a nutshell. I consider him more of a comedian than a serious musician. I can't think of a Michael Jackson song that didn't make me want to turn the radio dial. His voice was recognizable, yes, but it was also shrill and effeminate, and he overloaded his vocal lines with things like "hoo!" and "chucka-chucka" and whatever else it was. Morrissey did this, too, of course, but he was fond of the "diddly-idle-ay" nonsense singing from Irish folk music, and used it to much better effect.

As Ketamine Sun has already said, it might not be fair to assume that certain white alternative rock fans are liking Prince just to be able to name-check a black musician they like. They might be sincere. Prince does have a handful of decent tunes that lean more rock than pop. When the Doves Cry has good lyrics (more introspective than anything Michael Jackson ever did) and good vocal lines; if only they weren't laid over that annoying keyboard pattern. The unedited version of Purple Rain has a good long guitar outro. I think he had a wider pool of influences than Michael Jackson did. In his guitar playing, you can tell he obviously liked Eddie Hazel and Jimi Hendrix. But yes, he did devolve into an endless twilight of what you rightly call "masturbatory funk." I remember Batdance from the late 80s or early 90s, and thinking it was so awful that Prince might be beyond redemption at that point, and I guess I was right. I don't think he did anything memorable afterwards. Kiss was amusing, but I think the Tom Jones cover revealed it for what is was: a novelty song.
 
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Gregor Samsa

I straighten up, and my position is one of hope.
I may've subconsciously lumped his slagging off of Janet Jackson into a slagging off of her brother, @Gregor Samsa. I'm glad it was Janet, though; she deserves the more opprobrium. I would have to consider her the 80s artist I hate the most. There's not a single song of hers I don't consider to be a serious degree of awful. The style was called "New Jack Swing," and it has to be one of the worst musical styles I've ever heard. The keyboards are like clinking factory noises and breaking glass.

I agree on certain points about Michael Jackson. He was a good dancer, but most dancing is pretty comical. The iconic image of Michael Jackson I like to keep is that video scene where it's a typical 80s late-night milieu, with steam oozing out of the grates on rain-slicked city streets. He's in his standard MJ uniform and a beautiful girl passes him on the sidewalk. He screams "hey!" She turns around, he does a quick little shimmy dance, grabs his crotch, tips the brim of his hat, points at her and shrieks, "you knock me offa my feet now, baby—HOO!" and his falsetto shatters the glass of the nearby windows. That's Michael Jackson in a nutshell. I consider him more of a comedian than a serious musician. I can't think of a Michael Jackson song that didn't make me want to turn the radio dial. His voice was recognizable, yes, but it was also shrill and effeminate, and he overloaded his vocal lines with things like "hoo!" and "chucka-chucka" and whatever else it was. Morrissey did this, too, of course, but he was fond of the "diddly-idle-ay" nonsense singing from Irish folk music, and used it to much better effect.

As Ketamine Sun has already said, it might not be fair to assume that certain white alternative rock fans are liking Prince just to be able to name-check a black musician they like. They might be sincere. Prince does have a handful of decent tunes that lean more rock than pop. When the Doves Cry has good lyrics (more introspective than anything Michael Jackson ever did) and good vocal lines; if only they weren't laid over that annoying keyboard pattern. The unedited version of Purple Rain has a good long guitar outro. I think he had a wider pool of influences than Michael Jackson did. In his guitar playing, you can tell he obviously liked Eddie Hazel and Jimi Hendrix. But yes, he did devolve into an endless twilight of what you rightly call "masturbatory funk." I remember Batdance from the late 80s or early 90s, and thinking it was so awful that Prince might be beyond redemption at that point, and I guess I was right. I don't think he did anything memorable afterwards. Kiss was amusing, but I think the Tom Jones cover revealed it for what is was: a novelty song.
I think you’re pretty hard on Janet. Surely there are tons of artists from the 80’s that are worse than her? Have you heard Motley Crue?

Dancing is comical? I think you’re being deliberately flippant.

I think you’re describing the ‘The Way You Make Me Feel Video’, although he is not in his typical garb, nor does he wear a hat.

MJ being a comedian - again deliberately flippant. I assume you desperately want to channel the 1984 Morrissey. He has long since moved on and so should you.

His voice being shrill and effeminate - I guess you haven’t heard many of his songs. Try Billie Jean, Smooth Criminal or 2000 Watts. Nothing shrill nor effeminate in those vocals. And if you’re not a fan of shrill and/or effeminate vocals you really should stay clear of Prince!

Chucka-chucka? Not once has those “words” been uttered in an MJ song. But he did have a lot of vocal tics, as did many soul, funk and gospel singers.

I don’t think When Doves Cry has more introspective lyrics than, say, Stranger in Moscow, but it’s difficult to measure. Fantastic song, though, WDC.

Hard to say who had the most influences or the most eclectic. Michael came from soul and rnb, and stayed there to a large degree. But was obviously influenced by gospel, funk and, in his later years, hiphop. He often professed his love for classical music (especially Debussy and Tchaikovsky), pop, the Beatles and showtunes. And leaned towards industrial music and sounds during the nineties.

Agree about Kiss. Awful song, no matter the version.
 
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