why does everything suzanne say sound like it was typed by 60 yo?

[brokenddd]

she seems so incredibly bitter, bordering on envy for everyone and anyone who has heard the album/ might have met morrissey/writes less like an angry 60 year old spinster!

 

[Snug]

I don't know why she got so upset with me the other day. She's obviously a bit empty. Best ignore her. She'll die soon.

 

[suzanne]

> I don't know why she got so upset with me the other day. She's obviously a
> bit empty. Best ignore her. She'll die soon.

as long as those with split personalities are in agreement, and if morrissey agrees that he acts like an 80 year old, there's nothing wrong with being perceived as someone with a bit of a college education.

 

[Snug]

What? Does anyone here speak nuts?

 

[suzanne]

> What? Does anyone here speak nuts?

which one? Planters or cashews?

 

[Snug]

You know the way Morrissey's really witty? Well, you're different.

 

[brokenddd]

> You know the way Morrissey's really witty? Well, you're different.
suzanne is neither witty nor charming. She has all the eloquence of Meg Ryan on acid, and types like a angst-ridden high school poet, only without the flair.

If you're in any doubt whatever, check out her journal. It makes for hilariously drab reading.

If anyone around here is educated, it is certainly not suzanne. Morrissey isn't educated either, but he's got that way with words and... talent. Yes, talent. Something suzanne will never have.

 

[Girl A]

> she seems so incredibly bitter, bordering on envy for everyone and anyone
> who has heard the album/ might have met morrissey/writes less like an
> angry 60 year old spinster!

Angst-ridden, bitter and emotionally advanced beyond one's years, let me check again, are these not the qualities millions love Morrissey for?

If Morrissey is held as the benchmark of literary excellence and wit, then the lady is really not doing so badly being the "less talented" one, is she. I mean, how many actually surpass Morrissey? Name three.

P.S. Meg Ryan on acid sounds fabulous to me, far better than Michael Barrymore on dope, which some of you remind me of...

Girl A

 

[suzanne]

> Angst-ridden, bitter and emotionally advanced beyond one's years, let me
> check again, are these not the qualities millions love Morrissey for?

> If Morrissey is held as the benchmark of literary excellence and wit, then
> the lady is really not doing so badly being the "less talented"
> one, is she. I mean, how many actually surpass Morrissey? Name three.

hey, i'd say that i surpassed morrissey, but if he reads that, he may cancel his tour date!

or worse, people might start reading my stuff more seriously.

i think maybe our friend has picked up on a change in tone in my writing. it's not intentional, but i notice that whatever i'm reading at the time has it's own effect, and right now, i'm reading Charlotte Bronte's biography which was written sometime in the 1800's, so maybe he should have said that i write like a 160 year old!

> P.S. Meg Ryan on acid sounds fabulous to me, far better than Michael
> Barrymore on dope, which some of you remind me of...

yeah, but why Meg Ryan? why not Regis Philbin?

 

[pie.]

she taps it out in code and her 60 year old spinster nurse interprets it.

 

[WhyteGrrrl]

Better question. Why do people keep picking on Suzanne?

Do you have nothing better to do than talk bad about someone you have probably never met? For a Morrissey disscusion board I see less and less talk about Moz and Th'Lads every day!

 

[suzanne]

Re: Better question. Why do people keep picking on Suzanne?

> Do you have nothing better to do than talk bad about someone you have
> probably never met? For a Morrissey disscusion board I see less and less
> talk about Moz and Th'Lads every day!

they're not beating up on me because i'm a punching bag. it's because i have pretty much figured out when they are spouting garbage and don't mind letting them know they are full of shit.

 

[suzanne, dullard in denial]

Re: Better question. Why do people keep picking on Suzanne?

> they're not beating up on me because i'm a punching bag. it's because i
> have pretty much figured out when they are spouting garbage and don't mind
> letting them know they are full of shit.

No, it's because, as those really poorly written sentences show, you overrate yourself laughably and bore us all to death in the process.