The Moz/Smiths Top 100, Part 276: KICK THE BRIDE DOWN THE AISLE

How do you rate Kick the Bride Down the Aisle?


  • Total voters
    43

Houdini

Junior Member
In 2007, and early 2008, we put up polls for all 234 then released Morrissey and The Smiths-songs. More than 40,000 votes were cast and this resulted in The Morrissey/Smiths Top 100, or indeed, The Morrissey/The Smiths Top 234. In 2009/2010 we updated this chart with the 25 new songs that were released in 2008-2010. The final results of 2010, the 'Top 259', can be viewed here. Now, 4 years on, many people have asked me to continue with the polls as since the last one 25 new Morrissey-songs have been released.
So we'll start with the songs that were released in 2011, 2012 and 2013 and we'll end with the 18 songs from World Peace Is None of Your Business.

So here it goes. Let's hope for as big a turn-out as in 2007 and 2010 and, once again, vote with your heart, not with your mind.

Song 276: Kick the Bride Down the Aisle (Morrissey/Jesse Tobias)



Kick the bride down the aisle
and make no mistake
it's the best you can do
for everyone's sake
kick the bride down the aisle
and treasure the day
I know so much more than
I'm willing to say

She just wants a slave
to break his back in pursuit
of a living wage
so that she can laze and graze
for the rest of her days
write down every word I say

Kick the bride down the aisle
in a mudslide of gloom
she'll order you to
tidy your room

kick the bride down the aisle
look at that cow
in the field
it knows more
than your bride knows now

she just wants a slave
to break his back in pursuit
of a living wage
so that she can laze and graze
for the rest of her days
write down every word I say

You're that stretch of the beach
that the tide doesn't reach
no meaning, no reason
the lonely season

Kick the bride down the aisle
and treasure the day.


Previous polls:

Part 275: Smiler With Knife
Part 274: Kiss Me A Lot
Part 273: Staircase at the University
Part 272: I'm Not a Man
Part 271: Neal Cassady Drops Dead
Part 270: The Bullfighter Dies
Part 269: Earth is the Loneliest Planet
Part 268: Istanbul
Part 267: World Peace is None of Your Business
Part 266: You Say You Don't Love Me
Part 265: Satellite of Love
Part 264: The Kid's a Looker
Part 263: Action is My Middle Name
Part 262: People Are The Same Everywhere
Part 261: Safe, Warm Lancashire Home
Part 260: Treat Me Like a Human Being
Polls 259-1

EACH TIME YOU VOTE, YOU SUPPORT THE PROCESS!
 
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went eight. i love the fact that its a march. could be a funeral or a wedding or the same depending on how you want to view it. the the pause and crash is the musical moment that makes it for me. adds all the off step and pain
 
The worst song on the album, and a strong contender for worst song of his career. Unlistenable.
 
I gave it a 9. One of my favorites from WPINOYB—loved it on first listen.

KY's backing vocals are great. I thought she was a theremin.
 
I voted a seven.

The song is by far inferior to Staircase, Kiss Me and also to Drag The River.
 
9/10. Great song. I particularly like this passage:

You're that stretch of the beach
that the tide doesn't reach
no meaning, no reason
the lonely season

This lyric wouldn't seem out of place in many Morrissey songs.
 
I like it, but it's not one of my favorites on the album. If we're talking the vinyl version, it's my least favorite on that side, but it isn't my least favorite song on the album (which I gave a 6 to). I gave this a 7.
 
The lyrics are a bit weak in places but the song has a really strong melodic kick, especially the instrumental section. Pre-World Peace it would have been one of Jesse's best. It just shows how good his song-writing has become that it's probably his worst co-write on the album. 7 from me.
 
The lyrics are a bit weak in places but the song has a really strong melodic kick, especially the instrumental section. Pre-World Peace it would have been one of Jesse's best. It just shows how good his song-writing has become that it's probably his worst co-write on the album. 7 from me.

Good songwriting? As in re-writing "All The Lazy Dykes" and having the producer and/or His Master's Voice tart it up with some start/stop breaks, trumpets, and KY's godawful caterwauling? If anything is indicative of his songwriting growth, I'd point to "I'm a Man" or "Smiler With Knife" first. The bells (literally) and whistles can't cover the cracks on this weaker effort. I feel "Kick The Bride Down The Aisle," is, at best, a low-grade B-side and co-nadir of the album (sharing the indistinction with "Earth Is The Loneliest Planet"). The "beach" verse with harp is the one point of salvage.

This would have been a perfect slot on the album for "Art-Hounds" or "Forgive Someone." A wasted opportunity.
 
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