The Moz/Smiths Top 100, Part 135: PAINT A VULGARE PICTURE

How do you rate Paint A Vulgar Picture?

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Junior Member
The Moz/Smiths Top 100, Part 135: PAINT A VULGAR PICTURE

Let's compile our own Morrissey/Smiths Top 100 by rating all 232 Moz/Smiths-songs.


Voting should be something along these lines:
10: Perfection
9: Near perfect, brilliant
8: Really good Moz/Smiths song
7: Good Moz/Smiths song
6: Decent, OK, Nothing special
5: Uninspired
4: Poor
3: Bad
2: Should never have been released
1: He/They should be ashamed

The songs so far (voting is still open):

Part 134: Our Frank
Part 133: Ouija Board, Ouija Board
Part 132: Oscillate Wildly
Part 131: On The Streets I Ran
Part 130: Oh Well, I'll Never Learn
Part 129: Nowhere Fast
Part 128: Now My Heart Is Full
Part 127: Now I Am A Was
Part 126: November Spawned A Monster
Part 125: Noise Is The Best Revenge
Part 124: Nobody Loves Us
Part 123: No One Can Hold A Candle To You
Part 122: Never Had No One Ever
Part 121: My Love Life
Part 120: My Life Is A Succession Of People Goodbye
Part 119: Mute Witness
Part 118: Munich Air Disaster 1958
Part 117: Moonriver
Part 116: Money Changes Everything
Part 115: Miserable Lie
Part 114: Michael's Bones
Part 113: Mexico
Part 112: Meat Is Murder
Part 111: Margaret On The Guillotine
Part 110: Maladjusted
Part 109: Lucky Lisp
Part 108: Lost
Part 107: London
Part 106: Little Man, What Now?
Part 105: Lifeguard Sleeping, Girl Drowning
Part 104: Life Is A Pigsty
Part 103: Let the Right One Slip In
Part 102: Let Me Kiss You
Part 101: Late Night, Maudlin Street
Part 100: Last Night I Dreamt That Somebody Loved Me
Part 99: King Leer
Part 98: Journalists Who Lie
Part 97: Jeane
Part 96: Jack The Ripper
Part 95: It's Hard To Walk Tall When You're Small
Part 94: Is It Really So Strange?
Part 93: Irish Blood, English Heart
Part 92: Interlude
Part 91: Interesting Drug
Part 90: In The Future When All's Well
Part 89: If You Don't Like Me, Don't Look At Me
Part 88: I've Changed My Plea To Guilty
Part 87: (I'm) The End Of The Family Line
Part 86: I'm Not Sorry
Part 85: I'll Never Be Anybody's Hero Now
Part 84: I'd Love To
Part 83: I Won't Share You
Part 82: I Will See You In Far Off Places
Part 81: I Want The One I Can't Have
Part 80: I Started Something I Couldn't Finish
Part 79: I Like You
Part 78: I Know Very Well How I Got My Name
Part 77: I Know It's Over
Part 76: I Know It's Gonna Happen Someday
Part 75: I Knew I Was Next
Part 74: I Keep Mine Hidden
Part 73: I Just Want To See The Boy Happy
Part 72: I Have Forgiven Jesus
Part 71: I Don't Owe You Anything
Part 70: I Don't Mind If You Forget Me
Part 69: I Can Have Both
Part 68: I Am Two People
Part 67: I Am Hated For Loving
Part 66: Human Being
Part 65: How Soon Is Now?
Part 64: How Can Anybody Possibly Know How I Feel?
Part 63: Hold On To Your Friends
Part 62: Heir Apparent
Part 61: Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now
Part 60: He Knows I'd Love To See Him
Part 59: He Cried
Part 58: Have-A-Go Merchant
Part 57: Handsome Devil
Part 56: Hand In Glove
Part 55: Half A Person
Part 54: Hairdresser On Fire
Part 53: Good Looking Man About Town
Part 52: Golden Lights
Part 51: Glamorous Glue
Part 50: Girlfriend In A Coma
Part 49: Girl Least Likely To
Part 48: Girl Afraid
Part 47: Get Off The Stage
Part 46: Ganglord
Part 45: Friday Mourning
Part 44: Frankly Mr Shankly
Part 43: Found Found Found
Part 42: First Of The Gang To Die
Part 41: Everyday Is Like Sunday
Part 40: East West
Part 39: Driving Your Girlfriend Home
Part 38: Don't Make Fun Of Daddy's Voice
Part 37: Do Your Best And Don't Worry
Part 36: Disappointed
Part 35: Dial-A-Cliche
Part 34: Death Of A Disco Dancer
Part 33: Death At One's Elbow
Part 32: Dear God Please Help Me
Part 31: Dagenham Dave
Part 30: Cosmic Dancer
Part 29: Come Back To Camden
Part 28: Christian Dior
Part 27: Certain People I Know
Part 26: Cemetry Gates
Part 25: Break Up The Family
Part 24: Boxers
Part 23: Black-Eyed Susan
Part 22: Billy Budd
Part 21: Bigmouth Strikes Again
Part 20: Best Friend On The Payroll
Part 19: Bengali In Platforms
Part 18: Barbarism Begins At Home
Part 17: Back To The Old House
Part 16: At Last I Am Born
Part 15: At Amber
Part 14: Asleep
Part 13: Ask
Part 12: Asian Rut
Part 11: Angel, Angel, Down We Go Together
Part 10: Ammunition
Part 9: America Is Not The World
Part 8: Ambitious Outsiders
Part 7: Alsatian Cousin
Part 6: Alma Matters
Part 5: All The Lazy Dykes
Part 4: Accept Yourself
Part 3: A Swallow On My Neck
Part 2: A Song From Under The Floorboards
Part 1: A Rush And A Push And The Land Is Ours
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Radio Berlin

moz is ♥
love it
love it
love it

It has everything. It makes me cry.


Starved Of Mirth
A very good song, though not quite a classic. Johnny's music is excellent and the lyrics are good ... but they leave a bad taste in my mouth nowadays when Morrissey has done so much reissue and repackage nonsense in his own career (World Of Morrissey and My Early Burglary Years, step up!). It's one of those songs that meant more back in the day than it does now... but I still like it. Loved it when he sang it live and changed the line "Please the press in Belgium" to "Please depressing Belgians". I'll give it an 8.

Strong 8. I can sit through the length of it only if I focus on the lyrics. The lyrics - they vacillate from strokes of genius to double standard and from self-irony to painful honesty.

After this year I can also relate to some lines - that is also why I smile when I think about Voxhall - "I was fawning, I was boring":)


from the Ice Age to the dole age
Bloody love this one. 10


It's record companies, and contract obligations that are usually behind these reissue repackage schemes, and I think that's part of the point. It exploits the artist as well as the public.

I don't know who was behind the rereleases of Quarry in its different forms, though, but its hard to see Morrissey sitting down to plot that he would wait 6 months and rerelease with the b-sides.

Not that he's exempt from wanting cash, but I think using the words of this song against him misses the point that it is the evil record company he is singing about, and how they victimize the artist and turn the art into product.

or something like that...

Your Arsenal

yes I am blind
Wonderful masterpiece, even if its out of place in the album. but yeah. 10.
Reminds me of a precursor to Girl Least Likely to. Another song I love.
This amp goes to 11 ...


wild and free
Love it, a 10 from me.

In my heart I begged "Take me with you ...
I don't care where you're going..."

Don't we all feel like that towards Morrissey. I think so!


Well-Known Member
I've never been a fan of this song. Ever. I find the music plods along, Moz moaning about the wickedness of the music industry yawn yawn yawn. Some quality lyrical asides but the subsequent reissue, repackage of Morrissey's career hardly dictates his heart is in it. Was it then?

I prefer Why Don't you Find Out For Yourself as a polemic, if resigned piece on similar subject matters.

And as for You Know I Couldnt Last......... urggghhhh.
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