yes, nerak, i know! thats what i meant by 'explaining'. im not sure how deep into her memories and thoughts i have to go, how entirely i have to work out her psychology, and how much readers will be willing to accept without a huge framework to back it up (because some novels the authours dont explain their characters at all, but that may be because their characters personalities fall into the mainstream, or because the action is something that happens to the characters and sweeps them along rather than them creating the action). i want her psychology just to be a feature of the novel, i dont want to be slavishly devoted to it. so it's tricky. i also see that she's full of dichotomies and i dont know how to work that out.