Morrissey's sex songs

[CrystalGeezer]

Re: booooo stupid hoooooo

It all depends on how you feel about sex. "Reducing them to this level" makes me think you think sex is lowly and inherently bad. Many of us don't feel that way. A lot of the people making these jokes are people who really adore Morrissey and his songs, so I doubt they're saying these things in a mean-spirited or ugly way. They just don't see it as being as crass as you do.

Trust me, I love orgasming. But to think these and others are anything but crass and mean-spirited is being in denial. And I stress, I can be mean-spirited with the best of them, I just, I dunno. SOMething seems wrong to me about this and I mean that seriously.

You're Gonna Need Someone Up Your Arse
I Have Full-Frontaled Jesus
Irish Blokes, English Arse
You've Had Wood In Your Time
Anal, Anal, Up We Go Together
Bukake In Platforms
To Me You Are A Piece Of Ass
You Have Filled Me
Sarah Will Cum In The End
Such A Little Thing Makes Such A Big Discharge
We Hate It When Our Friends Become Bisexual

 

[Scarlet Ibis]

Re: booooo stupid hoooooo

Trust me, I love orgasming. But to think these and others are anything but crass and mean-spirited is being in denial. And I stress, I can be mean-spirited with the best of them, I just, I dunno. SOMething seems wrong to me about this and I mean that seriously.

I know you do. It's just... I mean, you know I love Morrissey so much that it's stupid, but even I see the humor in this stuff. I mean, he's an adult. He's not a child. He's also very sexual and can be rather crass himself.

I guess we'll just have to agree to disagree, but I want you to know that at least one person you know who loves him doesn't see it as mean-spirited.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

Re: booooo stupid hoooooo

Please tell me your joking.........

So Dali throws his mask over the eyes of the mona lisa which is a stab at the rigidity of classical art (or rather a highly educated gesture that Dali knew his shit) which is witty while being defacing and wildly accepted in the modern art scene as profound. To take Morrissey's art, or a portion of it reduced to his titles (and trust me, a lot of care goes into how he selects his titles) is to sort of do the same thing and it's funny for a bit. But 8 f***ing pages later and it's snowballed into this orgy or defacing his work which steps beyond the lines of clever into some f***ed up space of HOW LOW CAN WE GO? I guess I'm asking you to consider to step it up a notch. We get it. Sex is base. The crude pissing contest is over.

 

[Scarlet Ibis]

Re: booooo stupid hoooooo

So Dali throws his mask over the eyes of the mona lisa which is a stab at the rigidity of classical art (or rather a highly educated gesture that Dali knew his shit) which is witty while being defacing and wildly accepted in the modern art scene as profound. To take Morrissey's art, or a portion of it reduced to his titles (and trust me, a lot of care goes into how he selects his titles) is to sort of do the same thing and it's funny for a bit. But 8 f***ing pages later and it's snowballed into this orgy or defacing his work which steps beyond the lines of clever into some f***ed up space of HOW LOW CAN WE GO? I guess I'm asking you to consider to step it up a notch. We get it. Sex is base. The crude pissing contest is over.

I don't think they're doing it because sex is base. I think they're doing it because the topic was his "sex songs"... If it had been called "Morrissey's food songs", it might have started with Meat Is Murder and then turned into The Queen's French Bread and Something Is Squeezing My Scone. Or something.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

Re: booooo stupid hoooooo

I don't think they're doing it because sex is base. I think they're doing it because the topic was his "sex songs"... If it had been called "Morrissey's food songs", it might have started with Meat Is Murder and then turned into The Queen's French Bread and Something Is Squeezing My Scone. Or something.

Well, at the risk of sounding like the prudy preschool teacher barging in to break up the raucous playtime, I do want to say that I bet a dollar if Morrissey did read this thread or even contributed to it himself, (looking at his setlists it does seem like his type of fun) I'm sure a tiny part of his heart sinks when he reads some of these titles that've gone too far. But I guess we need not worry because he doesn't read this site anyway so by all means, keep shitting on his work, afterall, if you love him it's okay to do it, right?

 

[oscillate wildly]

I really just want to applaud you all for making me lulz a lot.

 

[CLOUD]

You Have Filled Me

well played

 

[spinelessswine]

Re: booooo stupid hoooooo

Well, at the risk of sounding like the prudy preschool teacher barging in to break up the raucous playtime, I do want to say that I bet a dollar if Morrissey did read this thread or even contributed to it himself, (looking at his setlists it does seem like his type of fun) I'm sure a tiny part of his heart sinks when he reads some of these titles that've gone too far. But I guess we need not worry because he doesn't read this site anyway so by all means, keep shitting on his work, afterall, if you love him it's okay to do it, right?

Oh my sweet tap-dancing Jesus on stilts, you're kidding me right?! You're taking this waaaaaay too seriously, you'll give yourself a hernia.

We're just having a bit of fun okay? Go back through the pages of this thread and you'll see probably more laughter and enjoyment than i think a lot of us have seen around here in a long time. This place gets too serious at times and it's nice to be reminded that we (well most of us) are able to have a bloody good laugh about something that is admittedly silly and immature but funny nonetheless.

Trying to guess how Morrissey would feel were he to come on here and read these reworkings is pretty sad too. I don't think any of us that've contributed are really too bothered. Plus, bearing in mind some of the stuff that gets written on this board I think he'd have enough to be scared about!

Just settle down. If this isn't your idea of fun then simply don't come on this thread. Don't be a whiny-guts, your fears of sounding like a pre-school teacher are well founded.

Suck Me If You Think You've Heard This One Before.

 

[Hellie]

Re: booooo stupid hoooooo

Well, at the risk of sounding like the prudy preschool teacher barging in to break up the raucous playtime, I do want to say that I bet a dollar if Morrissey did read this thread or even contributed to it himself, (looking at his setlists it does seem like his type of fun) I'm sure a tiny part of his heart sinks when he reads some of these titles that've gone too far. But I guess we need not worry because he doesn't read this site anyway so by all means, keep shitting on his work, afterall, if you love him it's okay to do it, right?

No way would his heart sink.

He'd laugh his head off.How could anyone not laugh at some of them they are genius.

You'd have to have a sense of humour bypass not to laugh or take any of it seriously.

 

[EPbabe]

Re: booooo stupid hoooooo

Well, at the risk of sounding like the prudy preschool teacher barging in to break up the raucous playtime, I do want to say that I bet a dollar if Morrissey did read this thread or even contributed to it himself, (looking at his setlists it does seem like his type of fun) I'm sure a tiny part of his heart sinks when he reads some of these titles that've gone too far. But I guess we need not worry because he doesn't read this site anyway so by all means, keep shitting on his work, afterall, if you love him it's okay to do it, right?

Prudy is probably the last word that comes into my mind thinking of you...

This thread is meant to be fun, good fun, there is nothing mean or cruel behind it. It amazes me how some forum members have a way with words - people, you're fantastic, keep up the good work. I don't know Morrissey personally but we all know him for having a wicked sense of humour - I bet he'd laugh his head off if he read this thread.

 

[Girl-with-the-Thorn]

I have too much time on my hands. Please, nobody throw tomatoes.

The Headmaster Roleplay

Funny, I never liked rules
In Manchester schools

But cane-swinging swines
Send shivers down my spine

Sir leads the troops
Lusting for youth
Same old sweet talk since year two

He does the military two-step
Grabs me roughly by the neck

I don't wanna home
Sir, say I can stay
After class, make me apologise
For all my mistakes

Mid-week on the muddy grass
Sir smacks you on the arse

Smiles and grabs your groin
Laughs in your face
Slap marks bigger than dinner plates

I don't wanna go home
Please sir, let me stay

Da-da-da ...

Make me obey rules
In Manchester schools

Controlling bastards all ...

Sir leads the troops
Lusting for youth
Same old smack since year two

He does the military two-step
Grabs me roughly by the neck

I don't wanna go home
Please sir let me stay
But I like the punishment so much
I might just make more mistakes

Please excuse me from gym
I've forgotten to put underwear on
He grabs and devours
He makes me suck him in the showers
Suck him in the showers
And he grabs and devours

I never want to go home
Please sir let me stay...

Oh-oh-OH ...

Too funny.

And CG, chill(ax). It's just light-hearted smut, and although Morrissey doesn't read this site, I don't think he'd be too outraged somehow, and would probably find it quite funny. It's nice to have a laugh on this forum, because all too often people get too serious. Leave it be and stop interrupting the fun.

 

[Maurice E]

It’s fair enough that these threads exist, but criticising them certainly doesn’t make you a prude, and you shouldn’t have a go at people who have the strength of character (knowing that they will appear uptight/uncool/narrow minded etc) to do so.

“Jizz Seeps Out Your c***”, “He grabs and devour, he makes me suck him in the showers”.
This simply isn't light-hearted smut.

Sexually explicit stuff surely belongs in the Pigsty. I’d like to suggest that this thread gets moved across…

 

[bored]

Sexually explicit stuff surely belongs in the Pigsty. I’d like to suggest that this thread gets moved across…

That's really not true.
Sexually explicit words have always been allowed on this website.

davidt has stated very strong opinions opposing censorship and I fully support that mentality.

People are just having fun and anyone who is not fond of this thread can put it on their ignore list.

The pigsty really is there so people can have it out at each other rather than having to ban people. It can be used for anything at all outside of posting porn and user info.

 

[MuteWitness616]

You guys are so immature!!

gosh!

 

[mcrickson]

“Jizz Seeps Out Your c***”, “He grabs and devour, he makes me suck him in the showers”.
This simply isn't light-hearted smut.

Mine was mentioned.

 

[mozsupportsrovers]

Re: oh

I'm allowed to swear like everyone else.

Youve just told me off for this in another thread, you really are a Mini Hitler!!!

 

[mcrickson]

Re: oh

Youve just told me off for this in another thread, you really are a Mini Hitler!!!

Except (presumably) with different bits downstairs

 

[mozsupportsrovers]

Re: oh

Except (presumably) with different bits downstairs

well i really dont know, i wouldnt put it past M-H(Kewpie's new abreveation)