Leave a Message to Morrissey

[CrystalGeezer]

Hi. It's Amie. In case we ever have a domestic life together as husband and wife, I just wanted to let you know that we now have a pet canary. I would've checked with you first but something just told me to take him. Okay, I hope that works out in case you have cats or anything. Oh, and I have a dog that likes to get cats to run then chase them. That could be a problem if you do have cats. We can work that out after we have lots of sex to make up for lost time. Okay, thanks for listening. Love your music.

 

[troubleluvsme]

Sweetie, PLEASE try not to hurt Amie's feelings when you finally tell her about us.

 

[Corrissey]

How rude. You girls should say goodbye before you hang up!

 

[*EqualOpportunityHater*]

Sweetie, PLEASE try not to hurt Amie's feelings when you finally tell her about us.

hahaha <3

 

[CrystalGeezer]

Sweetie, PLEASE try not to hurt Amie's feelings when you finally tell her about us.

I'm sure he'd let me down gently. You on the other hand, he'd just drop and most likely on your head since the damage has already been done.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

Morrissey,

Please be sure to watch A Charlie Brown Christmas tonight at 8pm on ABC. (I think it's on ABC.) It'll make you cry, but in a nice way.

 

[The Cat's Mother]

Morrissey, have you washed behind your ears or do I have to come over there and do it myself? *folds arms, looks stern*

 

[Franissey]

i'm sure he'd let me down gently. You on the other hand, he'd just drop and most likely on your head since the damage has already been done.

hahahahaha

 

[Franissey]

Dearest Morrissey,

Don't worry about turning 50. I made it to 50 and 51 is around the corner (February 16th to be exact, your record release day!). We both look marvelous!

Love you,

Fran

 

[Kilt Uncle]

Bread, Milk, Cheese, Coffee and Quavers.

 

[Unwitting Observer]

Dear Moz,

I am sorry about the whole cab fare thing. I thought it would be enough. Also, if anyone finds your pants, rest assured, I'll be in touch.

Love,

J.T.

 

[vivabob]

Dear Morrissey

some tips for next year ...

- Announce a tour in the conventional sense rather than the leaks to demand more interest in certain dates

- Dont reform the smiths, it would be shit and you would have to share the cash

- keep alain whyte on the payroll , he does a turn

- Get the finger out with the book , it would be a good read and would sell well

- Try and get Gene to reform the way you did with the NYDs

Have a nice christmas and new year , give your mum my love

Eat Drink and Be Merry

Cheers

Mr and Mrs VB

P.S Jen asks if you could limit the amout of gigs you do outside glasgow as we are slightly poor

 

[Practising Troublemaker]

Morrissey, in May 2009 I was wondering if you want to come to Bamburgh with me for the week? I have a spare bed (well that is if my bro doesn't come) If my bro does come then you can crash on the sofa. Oh, and make sure you bring some money for a stick of Northumberland rock!

Love PTxx.

 

[someofusisturningnasty]

whilst you're down there love...

 

[Corrissey]

Remember me? I told you what Frinky stood for.

 

[jesuisbryony]

Remember me? I told you what Frinky stood for.

Haha really?

Morrissey, I must apologise on Corrissey's behalf, you've probably not slept since.

 

[Corrissey]

Haha really?

Morrissey, I must apologise on Corrissey's behalf, you've probably not slept since.

Really.

On the contrary, I bet he's slept like a baby since (finally) knowing its meaning.

 

[LegalTender]

please release a picture of your penis. it could be like art...

 

[Corrissey]

please release a picture of your penis. it could be like art...

Great. Now he's not going to read this thread. ...

 

[CrystalGeezer]

Please do not release a picture of your penis despite the fact it most definitely would be art, just don't. kthx.