Does anyone have a link to the story about Morrissey's personal assistant?

Towelgate grows evermore mysterious.
What is he doing with them?
I received a call yesterday, a throaty voice warned me 'forget the towels. If you care about your physical well-being you'll walk away.'
Good lord!
I hear that he requests a large open room at each venue, devoid of furniture, and he and the rest of the band strip nude with the object of the game being to chase and whip each other on the buttocks with them while giggling. Kind of like tag, but with more nudity, mild welts and hurt feelings. Evidently it's led to more than one cancellation.
 
News Flash: Touring singer uses 20 towels per night!

Sorry, in my world this far away from being unreasonable. I use at least 4 towels when I shower and I am not even running around on stage.
are you a diplodocus?
 
I hear that he requests a large open room at each venue, devoid of furniture, and he and the rest of the band strip nude with the object of the game being to chase and whip each other on the buttocks with them while giggling. Kind of like tag, but with more nudity, mild welts and hurt feelings. Evidently it's led to more than one cancellation.
I knew buttocks would be involved somewhere.
The whole affair smacks of arse cheeks.
 
I knew buttocks would be involved somewhere.
The whole affair smacks of arse cheeks.
It's nothing to be sniffed at. Why do you think he's had so many personnel changes over the years? You kind of have to let the boss win once in a while.
Obviously Boz gets it the worst, on account of there being a lot more buttock to whip.
 
It's nothing to be sniffed at. Why do you think he's had so many personnel changes over the years? You kind of have to let the boss win once in a while.
Obviously Boz gets it the worst, on account of there being a lot more buttock to whip.
You're quite right dear G.
The man is rump rich.
A tempting target for a damp twisted towel.
You know we should have spotted the signs when Moz overdid it with paper napkins back in the 90's.
Serviettes are the classic gateway drug.
 
Oh my ! :lbf:

didn't Morrissey show this video before he went on stage?;)

He should! It would please the towel enthusiasts.

The bare unfathomable truth is that some people cares about Cut Hands, Dream Machines and half-remarkable questions, and some other people cares about towels.

Mankind is weird... and the importance of towels in the history of rock'n'roll is VERY underrated.

 
I hear that he requests a large open room at each venue, devoid of furniture, and he and the rest of the band strip nude with the object of the game being to chase and whip each other on the buttocks with them while giggling. Kind of like tag, but with more nudity, mild welts and hurt feelings. Evidently it's led to more than one cancellation.

Funniest post of the year! I guess that is not saying much, but still....

BTW I am forming a new band the Mild Welts and our first album will be titled Hurt Feelings

***UPDATE***

First single will drop February 1st: Not Your Whipping Boy
 
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Funniest post of the year! I guess that is not saying much, but still....

BTW I am forming a new band the Mild Welts and our first album will be titled Hurt Feelings

Sshhh evennow, keep quite, before you know what’s happening Tony Visconti has mastered it and destroys your career.
We all know it happened before.
 
He should! It would please the towel enthusiasts.

The bare unfathomable truth is that some people cares about Cut Hands, Dream Machines and half-remarkable questions, and some other people cares about towels.

Mankind is weird... and the importance of towels in the history of rock'n'roll is VERY underrated.



AH! yes... this is it ! Elvis! Actually there was a fan who use to jump on stage just to ask Morrissey for his towel!, I only witnessed it once at his Nassau Coliseum show in Long Island NY 1991. He cancelled the next night, which may have been his first ever canceled show due to sickness(?)
 
AH! yes... this is it ! Elvis! Actually there was a fan who use to jump on stage just to ask Morrissey for his towel!, I only witnessed it once at his Nassau Coliseum show in Long Island NY 1991. He cancelled the next night, which may have been his first ever canceled show due to sickness(?)

Or lack of towels. :)
 
Sshhh evennow, keep quite, before you know what’s happening Tony Visconti has mastered it and destroys your career.
We all know it happened before.

Thank you QQQ for your concern. But I have an ace...or...creator up my sleeve so I will be fine! My master will be handled by the Master! :babyangel:
 
Thank you QQQ for your concern. But I have an ace...or...creator up my sleeve so I will be fine! My master will be handled by the Master! :babyangel:

Yes but is He any good at it?
I have some doubts about Him mastering anything at all in this world.
You could sel your soul to Satan.
He would make sure you get the mastering you want.
 
AH! yes... this is it ! Elvis! Actually there was a fan who use to jump on stage just to ask Morrissey for his towel!, I only witnessed it once at his Nassau Coliseum show in Long Island NY 1991. He cancelled the next night, which may have been his first ever canceled show due to sickness(?)

The only story I have with towels involves John Lydon playing with PIL, probably around 1992 (I remember it was their "That what is not" tour).... when he threw a towel to the audience and it landed all over my face. I do not really have a fetish for towels, so I gave it to a friend... and I believe he still has it.

The morale of the story is that some things that people picks up at concerts are not valuable once the concert is over.
Morrissey should play the famous Blow Up scene before his shows!
 
The only story I have with towels involves John Lydon playing with PIL, probably around 1992 (I remember it was their "That what is not" tour).... when he threw a towel to the audience and it landed all over my face. I do not really have a fetish for towels, so I gave it to a friend... and I believe he still has it.

The morale of the story is that some things that people picks up at concerts are not valuable once the concert is over.
Morrissey should play the famous Blow Up scene before his shows!

Speaking of Johnny and towels. You can't deny the guy is a trooper continuing the show.
 
Speaking of Johnny and towels. You can't deny the guy is a trooper continuing the show.


Some of the "punks" there are a BIG problem and they are too confused. I used to help some people from Chile with some concerts and there was ALWAYS a problem with the local "punks" who were always eager to attack anything that was not "authentic" according to their standards.

Quite similar to the attitude of some people who hangs around here actually.
 
The only story I have with towels involves John Lydon playing with PIL, probably around 1992 (I remember it was their "That what is not" tour).... when he threw a towel to the audience and it landed all over my face. I do not really have a fetish for towels, so I gave it to a friend... and I believe he still has it.

The morale of the story is that some things that people picks up at concerts are not valuable once the concert is over.
Morrissey should play the famous Blow Up scene before his shows!


'.... when he threw a towel to the audience and it landed all over my face.'

the real holy shroud of Turin !!!! :fearscream::lbf:








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Some of the "punks" there are a BIG problem and they are too confused. I used to help some people from Chile with some concerts and there was ALWAYS a problem with the local "punks" who were always eager to attack anything that was not "authentic" according to their standards.

Quite similar to the attitude of some people who hangs around here actually.
Punks that are hung up on Lydon being punk enough or not reallllly missed the boat.
Sure, the Pistols launched 1000 bands, and most of them better- but P.i.L. is one of the best post-punk bands of all time. Visceral, engaging, incredibly funny, and with a depth of emotion and insight that the Pistols never even approached.

I think when it comes to the punks you described, the closest thing here would be the rash of Skinheads about 20 years ago. They ruined the entire local scene with their violence and idiocy, and made many larger shows a lot less fun/safe by their presence.
 
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