BtBB merch store™ announcement

  • Thread starter Benny-the-British-Butcher
  • Start date
B

Benny-the-British-Butcher

Guest
To mark the release of Dog Chain but more so due to cheer everyone up in the present situation The BtBB🇬🇧:knife: Merch Store will be releasing some very rare limited edition merch with absolutely zero profit margins later on this evening.

Little Benny will be posting the items around 19:00

Watch this space.

Stay Safe Everyone

Benny 🇬🇧:knife:
 

evennow

Writers on the storm
To mark the release of Dog Chain but more so due to cheer everyone up in the present situation The BtBB🇬🇧:knife: Merch Store will be releasing some very rare limited edition merch with absolutely zero profit margins later on this evening.

Little Benny will be posting the items around 19:00

Watch this space.

Stay Safe Everyone

Benny 🇬🇧:knife:
I do hope you have received in the shipment of Morrissey signed T-shirts:

I Am Not a Dog on a Chain
BUT
Coronavirus is a Bitch of a Strain

Please place one X-Large on hold for me. Thanks!

I have also heard during this trying time that the Merch Store will be accepting:

1584790586433.jpeg


:thumb:
 
I do hope you have received in the shipment of Morrissey signed T-shirts:

I Am Not a Dog on a Chain
BUT
Coronavirus is a Bitch of a Strain

Please place one X-Large on hold for me. Thanks!

I have also heard during this trying time that the Merch Store will be accepting:

View attachment 55286

:thumb:
Not sure where you've heard that, i don't think even Mike Joyce is accepting those now. Though I would suggest another use for them in light of certain paper shortages.

Dave the delivery van driver has just told me he's on his way up the M6 with the merch now - this is gonna be a great haul, Benny's been signing away in his self isolation.

-little benny 🔪🇬🇧
 

evennow

Writers on the storm
Not sure where you've heard that, i don't think even Mike Joyce is accepting those now. Though I would suggest another use for them in light of certain paper shortages.

Dave the delivery van driver has just told me he's on his way up the M6 with the merch now - this is gonna be a great haul, Benny's been signing away in his self isolation.

-little benny 🔪🇬🇧
@The Chameleon Is this true? Have you landed on a new occupation?

#KMartmandown
#KMartsucks
 
Evening all, Dave the van driver has just pulled into the merch shop with a load of goodies.

The Dude is Dead shirt S/M/L/XL - now half price
IMG-20200307-WA0001.jpg

Brand new poster as signed by yours truly - £100
IMG-20200321-WA0014.jpg

Official BtBB bog roll - needed now more than ever - £5
IMG-20200321-WA0003.jpg

Official BtBB face mask - filters both coronavirus and bullshit - £5
IMG-20200321-WA0012.jpg


More to come later on

-little benny 🇬🇧🔪
 

NealCassidy

Well-Known Member
freak
 

The Chameleon

#KingGamma
Maybe a few items fall out of the back of the van:

I'll tell you a #TrueStory about theft. I worked in the electronics department at K-Mart when the movie Titanic came out on VHS (!!!) and that's not really relevant to the story except to show how some people here have been hanging on to this #KMartDave thing. Bhops even expressed his disappointment that I'm wasting my life "pushing trolleys" and it's not that I'm not wasting my life but I don't "push trolleys!" In fact my job is scraping chewing gum off the wheels so they will roll straight.
#Anyway so I did like working in electronics. I sold entertainment products including CD's and stereos so I got to spend time doing things I sort of liked doing. I also got to size people up immediately when they were looking at a stereo and see if they were a "Garth Brooks" or a "Lauryn Hill." Those were the CD's I used to demonstrate the sounds.
So we also sold movies, like I said, and I was friendly with the distributor and she would give me promo items because I was really trying to sell those movies. Other people were sentenced to stocking shelves and I got to sell games, cd's and movies plus my manager was really cool and at the time I smoked a lot of marijuana and would come to work high and she didn't care because we made each other laugh. Usually I thought I hid it but one day she knew and after that she would look at me to sort of judge if she could tell.
We're getting to the point though. So we had to wear these vests and we had lockers but they never gave me a lock for my locker. There were people that had been there for twenty years and hated life and I guess they could tell I would probably not make it a career. (Shhhh!)
The movie lady would give me little cardboard standees I think they're called for new movies, but she would also give me these buttons/badges that went with the movies. We were probably supposed to change the buttons so we always had just the latest movie but I collected them and had about a six on my vest.
So... one day I come to work and go to my unlocked locker and my vest with the buttons is gone! We had to wear one so I found a different one and wore that and just thought it was strange but whatever.
A few days went by and this woman who worked there who was about 55 comes in the break room and #TheBitch is wearing MY VEST with my buttons!
I wanted to snatch it off of her because it was obviously mine. It was an XL to start with and plus it was mine. She hardly even worked in that department. But I didn't do anything right then because I have this trait where I will think something like that is funny and then I might suddenly be saying things that would get me fired. So instead I told the manager of my department. She said "are you suuuuure?" Looking at me like "how many bonghits did he take before he came up with this?" But then she said not to do anything and she would deal with it. And the next day my vest with all my buttons was back in my locker. The lady who'd been wearing it should have been a spy because she just went on like nothing ever happened. You know lots of people would try to "explain" but she just acted like nothing. And I said thank you to the manager and we didn't talk about it again.
Now vegan cro and Born to Harangue can obsess over this for the next twenty-five years!
 

evennow

Writers on the storm
I'll tell you a #TrueStory about theft. I worked in the electronics department at K-Mart when the movie Titanic came out on VHS (!!!) and that's not really relevant to the story except to show how some people here have been hanging on to this #KMartDave thing. Bhops even expressed his disappointment that I'm wasting my life "pushing trolleys" and it's not that I'm not wasting my life but I don't "push trolleys!" In fact my job is scraping chewing gum off the wheels so they will roll straight.
#Anyway so I did like working in electronics. I sold entertainment products including CD's and stereos so I got to spend time doing things I sort of liked doing. I also got to size people up immediately when they were looking at a stereo and see if they were a "Garth Brooks" or a "Lauryn Hill." Those were the CD's I used to demonstrate the sounds.
So we also sold movies, like I said, and I was friendly with the distributor and she would give me promo items because I was really trying to sell those movies. Other people were sentenced to stocking shelves and I got to sell games, cd's and movies plus my manager was really cool and at the time I smoked a lot of marijuana and would come to work high and she didn't care because we made each other laugh. Usually I thought I hid it but one day she knew and after that she would look at me to sort of judge if she could tell.
We're getting to the point though. So we had to wear these vests and we had lockers but they never gave me a lock for my locker. There were people that had been there for twenty years and hated life and I guess they could tell I would probably not make it a career. (Shhhh!)
The movie lady would give me little cardboard standees I think they're called for new movies, but she would also give me these buttons/badges that went with the movies. We were probably supposed to change the buttons so we always had just the latest movie but I collected them and had about a six on my vest.
So... one day I come to work and go to my unlocked locker and my vest with the buttons is gone! We had to wear one so I found a different one and wore that and just thought it was strange but whatever.
A few days went by and this woman who worked there who was about 55 comes in the break room and #TheBitch is wearing MY VEST with my buttons!
I wanted to snatch it off of her because it was obviously mine. It was an XL to start with and plus it was mine. She hardly even worked in that department. But I didn't do anything right then because I have this trait where I will think something like that is funny and then I might suddenly be saying things that would get me fired. So instead I told the manager of my department. She said "are you suuuuure?" Looking at me like "how many bonghits did he take before he came up with this?" But then she said not to do anything and she would deal with it. And the next day my vest with all my buttons was back in my locker. The lady who'd been wearing it should have been a spy because she just went on like nothing ever happened. You know lots of people would try to "explain" but she just acted like nothing. And I said thank you to the manager and we didn't talk about it again.
Now vegan cro and Born to Harangue can obsess over this for the next twenty-five years!
You had me at:

 
B

Benny-the-British-Butcher

Guest
Wow just look at all that lovely merch rolling out at last.
Apologies for the delay tonight but Dave got stuck in traffic on the M6. (Many thanks Dave).
Now listen up. There is no need to panic buy, we have plenty of stock for everyone.
We have plenty more merch to post in the coming days ahead so keep refreshing.
Tomorrow I’m going to announce a big one (It’s a one off for one lucky person only)
biggest collectible giveaway ever, a 100% pure Banksy kinda thing that will happen in real time.

£100 for a poster????? :eek: Think little benny got that one wrong. £10 + free P+P I’ll stand the cost.:thumb:

Take care everyone
Benny x

🇬🇧:knife:
 
B

Benny-the-British-Butcher

Guest
Imagine going to all that trouble to try and be funny: imagine the state of the gaff he lives in. Reckon he drives a 54 mondeo as well.
But Sammy
I run a successful business as well as the merch store without any funding from Uncle Steve.
Apart from being an out of work Gary Barlow lookalike at the present what do you actually do to earn your quorn? :brows:

🇬🇧:knife:
 
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