Article: "List of the Lost" reviews in The Guardian (#2), Emily ReyNOlds; TTY UK bookshop photo; med

An anonymous person posts the link:

List of the Lost by Morrissey review – 'verbose, tangential, unfocused' by Alex Clark - The Guardian
There’s so much inelegant confusion in this story of a teenage relay team that a short novel feels far too long. Moz has dropped the baton and what he needs is an editor

"Some sentences are pure gibberish."

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Detritus posted the link:

"List of the Lost" review by Emily ReyNOlds (1 out of 10) - Medium

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Morran sends the link:

Morrissey's 'List of the Lost' is launched in the UK - true-to-you.net
24 September 2015

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Morrissey's debut novel, List of the Lost: the 10 most embarrassing lines by Michael Deacon - The Telegraph. Link posted by an anonymous person (original post).

Morrissey's debut novel: not one, but two outrageous sex scenes by Alice Vincent - The Telegraph. Link posted by an anonymous person (original post).

Morrissey Debut Novel Savaged In First Reviews - Sky News

Morrissey's debut novel has got everyone talking - but not for the right reasons - Irish Examiner

 

[Uncleskinny]

This is funny. It really is.

http://noisey.vice.com/blog/a-morrissey-take-on-some-classic-sex-scenes

 

[vegan.cro]

There's nothing 19th century about anything I've read so far.

Not thematic content, the style, of course.

 

[ninetimesfined]

The very same occurred to me. It's the dawn of a new genre.

That kind of thing has been going on for years; Amanda McKittrick Ros is regarded by many as being the worst author ever published. Tolkien, CS Lewis and Aldous Huxley were huge fans and would hold competitions to see who could read her work for the longest without laughing.

I've never read any of Ros' work but I've seen excerpts and actually List of the Lost has a very similar prose style...

 

[Sidnettle]

Not thematic content, the style, of course.

I said nothing.

 

[itsmorrisseyyy]

Have you all seen this? http://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/a-brief-overanalysis-of-morrisseys-nightmarish-vision-of-shagging-103 - I got on the bus into Central London this evening after work to buy List of the Lost and I read this, and I had to close the page several times because I was at risk of snorting with laughter in public, and that's never a good look.

I'm in bed now and ready to read it. I'm still really excited, despite the overwhelming negative reviews. I do think that no matter what I think of the book, this has been the best laugh I've had in ages, and I've not even opened the damn thing yet. I've been really depressed lately, and I've missed laughing. This, combined with the fantastic gig at Hammersmith on Monday (it was literally better than sex - or should I say it was even better than any 'bulbous salutation extenuating excitement as it smacks its way into every muscle of my body, except for the otherwise central zone'?), has been a large part of making this week bearable. Thank you, Morrissey. <3

 

[Anonymous]

Thoroughly enjoyed, well done, you should be proud of this Morrissey.

 

[Anonymous]

Wait - are you saying only those who've attempted the same are qualified to critique? What about concert goers? Football match attendees? Opera and theatre goers? Sure, make up your own mind, but after. You've gone all emperor's new clothes. You know everyone else says it shit, but, without reading it yourself, you know different. Lots of people have read it. I have not seen one positive review. If you find one, please post it.

I've read it and absolutely love it, so not everyone else says it's shit after all. I will write a review tomorrow. You were never going to like it - you'd made up your mind before it was even written.

R

 

[Stanley the 2nd]

I received my copy today from amazon......... oh man this book is going to take some reading. I've read the first 2 pages a couple of times and my brain is hurting. Not really what I was expecting but I will have to persevere. The opening page of autobiography was brilliant..... the opening page of this book seems to be an experiment in overblown pomp. I also received a brief history of seven killings, a book about the attempted murder of Bob Marley, which I will probably read first.

 

[Skylarker]

I am confused as to why anyone is supposed to give a f*** what Emily Reynolds thinks about this, or any other piece, of literature.

She looks like a doe eyed twat. What is she, all of 22? f*** her.

 

[Anaesthesine]

Have you all seen this? http://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/a-brief-overanalysis-of-morrisseys-nightmarish-vision-of-shagging-103 - I got on the bus into Central London this evening after work to buy List of the Lost and I read this, and I had to close the page several times because I was at risk of snorting with laughter in public, and that's never a good look.

I just did some public snorting myself - thanks for the link. This is the only passage from the book I've read thus far, because "bulbous salutation" was trending on twitter earlier, and people seem to be bowled over by the... contorted pungency of the prose.

 

[Anonymous]

She looks like a doe eyed twat. What is she, all of 22? f*** her.

A stunning critique of rare wit and insight. Is that you, Morrissey?

 

[Skylarker]

Let's think about this for a moment before our panties get any further contorted in between our ass cheeks:

It's a novel. Written by Morrissey. It's gotten horrible reviews.

It's a novel. Written by Morrissey. It's gotten horrible reviews.

It's a novel. Written by Morrissey. It's gotten horrible reviews.

It's a novel. Written by Morrissey. It's gotten horrible reviews.

 

[vegan.cro]

Re: Article: &quot;List of the Lost&quot; reviews in The Guardian (#2), Emily ReyNOlds; TTY UK bookshop photo; media mentions

I am confused as to why anyone is supposed to give a f*** what Emily Reynolds thinks about this, or any other piece, of literature.

She looks like a doe eyed twat. What is she, all of 22? f*** her.

Right. How bizzare, now, Emily (who???) Reynolds is esthetic authority for uncle P. She is nobody. Bizzare.

- - - Updated - - -

Let's think about this for a moment before our panties get any further contorted in bewteen our ass cheeks:

It's a novel. Written by Morrissey. It's gotten horrible reviews.

It's a novel. Written by Morrissey. It's gotten horrible reviews.

It's a novel. Written by Morrissey. It's gotten horrible reviews.

Also right.
In the case of the novel LIST OF THE LOST, arts in which the public
does take an interest, the result of the exercise of popular
authority has been absolutely ridiculous. No country produces such
badly written fiction, such tedious, common work in the
novel-form.... It must necessarily be so. The popular standard is
of such a character that no artist can get to it. It is at once too
easy and too difficult to be a popular novelist. It is too easy,
because the requirements of the public as far as plot, style,
psychology, treatment of life, and treatment of literature are
concerned are within the reach of the very meanest capacity and the
most uncultivated mind. It is too difficult, because to meet such
requirements the artist would have to do violence to his
temperament, would have to write not for the artistic joy of
writing, but for the amusement of half-educated people, and so
would have to suppress his individualism, forget his culture,
annihilate his style, and surrender everything that is valuable in
him....

 

[Skylarker]

"2. Snoozled in sleepland

“All quiet, all still in this decent and pleasant atmosphere of slumber and repose, where lush houses of beddy-bye shut-eye snoozled in sleepland; a smiling sleep of dreamland.”

Good for a Dr. Seuss children's book not so much for a gothic romantic novel.

neighboring towns of Neverland.

I am pretty sure there is supposed to be something hypnotic/spellbinding/lullabyish about this. From what I can tell he's being intentionally non-prosaic. I cannot believe how angry people are getting, or upset.

 

[vegan.cro]

I am pretty sure there is supposed to be something hypnotic/spellbinding/lullabyish about this. From what I can tell he's being intentionally non-prosaic. I cannot believe how angry people are getting, or upset.

Also right!!!
The one thing that the public dislikes is novelty. Any attempt to
extend the subject-matter of art is extremely distasteful to the
public; and yet the vitality and progress of art depend in a large
measure on the continual extension of subject-matter. The public
dislikes novelty because it is afraid of it.... A fresh mode of
Beauty is absolutely distasteful to the public, and whenever it
appears it gets so angry and bewildered that it always uses two
stupid expressions--one is that the work of art is grossly
unintelligible; the other, that the work of art is grossly immoral.
When the public says a work is grossly unintelligible, it means
that the artist has said a beautiful thing that is new; when the
public describes a work as grossly immoral, it means that the
artist has said or made a beautiful thing that is true. The former
expression has reference to style; the latter to subject-matter.
But it probably uses the words very vaguely, as an ordinary mob
will use ready-made paving-stones. _There is not a single real poet
or prose-writer of this century on whom the
British public has not solemnly conferred diplomas of
immorality_.... Of course, the public is very reckless in the use
of the word.... An artist is, of course, not disturbed by it. The
true artist is a man who believes absolutely in himself, because he
is absolutely himself. But I can fancy that if an artist produced a
work of art in England, that immediately on its appearance was
recognised by the public, through its medium, which is the public
press, as a work that was quite intelligible and highly moral, he
would begin seriously to question whether in its creation he had
really been himself at all, and consequently whether the work was
not quite unworthy of him, and either of a thoroughly second-rate
order or of no artistic value whatsoever.

 

[g23]

Re: Article: &quot;List of the Lost&quot; reviews in The Guardian (#2), Emily ReyNOlds; TTY UK bookshop photo; media mentions

You sound like you're describing yourself as the years go by, wait, no you look GLORIOUS as the years go by. Right.[/QUOTE]

Well, I don't have any shiny shirts, if that's what you're getting at.
Why would an average person need yes men or editors? Do you? Do I? I'm just a simple man with a simple life. It's enjoyable enough most days.
Morrissey, like it or not- has pulled some laughable shit in recent years. Not everyone is a blind idle idol worshipper. He's just a man making dubious career choices toward the end of his run, propelled onward by those who would nod so hard their necks must hurt at everything he craps out, musically or otherwise.

 

[Anonymous]

I thought the first half of the novel was quite enjoyable, despite the purple prose and excessive alliteration - but the fiction gradually got drowned out by the author's intrusive rants on Queen Elizabeth, Churchill, the meat industry, and how he despises judges, police, royalty and anyone in a position of authority. Oh, and spending three pages going on about f***ing 'Bonanza', for some reason.

Also, the narrative of the child killer was just laughably trite.

Ultimately - and it gives me no pleasure to say this at all - 'List of the Lost' is without a doubt the worst novel I have ever read.

 

[AgathaC]

Wait - are you saying only those who've attempted the same are qualified to critique? What about concert goers? Football match attendees? Opera and theatre goers? Sure, make up your own mind, but after. You've gone all emperor's new clothes. You know everyone else says it shit, but, without reading it yourself, you know different. Lots of people have read it. I have not seen one positive review. If you find one, please post it.

What I am saying is that you are completely deranged, you are completely obsessed with hating Morrissey. Did he not shake your hand at a concert? What is it about all the hate towards him. Leave him alone and go get counseling to get over your hate. I wish more men were like him, most are like you talentless jerks.

 

[Anonymous]

This is funny. It really is.

http://noisey.vice.com/blog/a-morrissey-take-on-some-classic-sex-scenes

Now THAT really exploded in the central part (of my brain). Very satisfying. (Who'd have thunk Oscars could be...)

 

[Tralala]

Is this a hoax? Is Morrissey insane? These passages are beyond ludicrous. Why in god's name would Penguin stand behind such a piece of shit?