Age is just a number or a curse?

Mozzy1

Mozzy1

New Member
I have to ask this....my brother has been teasing me mercilessly & will continue to do so up until Sat. 10/18. That's my 35th b-day.

I've been DONE w/ the Internet dating scene since September 2005. Other options, I've done & kept open yet, to no avail, things remain the same.

My brother even though he's married & younger than myself states that, something is majorly WRONG w/me in regards to this factor & he states ageism is a major player too. Yet, he always blows this stink up in a funny fashion, by teasing me quite often. Yes, I will admit, it really hurts at times.

What I'm basically asking is, the number here in my area is that, by my age, if you're not married or involved in a serious relationship that, something IS quite wrong w/ you. Yes, I'm VERY straight too & have my heart open yet, nothing is obviously happening.

Is ageism just a number?
Is it going to be a curse about this now since it hasn't happened?
What else can I do even though, I've surrendered it all off? This is what I've been doing since I surrendered all of my profiles in September 2005.

Are there other people here that are either 35 or older that aren't married? How do you put the pressure & stress aside when people are "ignorant" about it?
 
I used to think, in my early 20s, that there must be something wrong with a guy if he wasn't married by the time he was 30.
I was naive. Bad times.

I'm over 30 but feel like a 16 year old. Good times.
 
So, is it a typical bad trait in the UK that, if you're not married by 35 you're going to be a spinster/left alone on the shelf?

Why is it this way in America then? It makes people feel so crappy when they're alone, trust me...
 
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Mozzy1 said:
So, is it a typical bad trait in the UK that, if you're not married by 35 you're going to be a spinster/left alone on the shelf?

Why is it this way in America then? It makes people feel so crappy when they're alone, trust me...
Click to expand...

Every year that passes is a year closer to death. If that is not Morrissey enough for everyone I don't know what is.
 
I am 32 and i am not worried about being married by 35.i could care less.ifi meet someone and i eventually marry them,so be it.
if not,i will manage.not really a burden for me.
i like getting older,though i do not look my age at all.which may help.
 
Based on Mozzy1's profile, she is a woman.. I think a lot of people are assuming she is a man and therefore are embracing their age.

Agism is very real when it comes to women. Men generally like women younger than them.. so if you are 35.. you might find it hard to find men that are 35 but if you look for men you who are 40-50 you might have different levels of success.

The other thing that is very different is that men put much more importance on looks. This really means that your actual age is not as important as your perceived age.
 
So, what are some birthday ideas then:

1) you don't want to see your family b/c they will "tease" you & make you feel worse but, you don't want to hurt their feelings b/c they want to see you?

2) you have no friends that are single so, you do NOT want to be a third-wheel?

3) you don't want to do things that are not your personality, like going to clubs & bars...whereas, go to a nice restaurant, etc?

4) you sure as he** don't want to be alone, in a depressive funk knowing your age & that you ARE alone...

What ideas does anyone have? Suggestions appreciated.
 
Mozzy1 said:
So, what are some birthday ideas then:
Click to expand...

present & cake:)


Mozzy1 said:
1) you don't want to see your family b/c they will "tease" you & make you feel worse but, you don't want to hurt their feelings b/c they want to see you?
Click to expand...
I tease them more then tease me.....tease you about what? your age...I tell them i am happy getting older & as I am the baby, your a lot older then me:)

If that doesn't stop them, tell em to shut UP!




Mozzy1 said:
2) you have no friends that are single so, you do NOT want to be a third-wheel?
Click to expand...

I have plenty of single friends, hasn't every one?


Mozzy1 said:
3) you don't want to do things that are not your personality, like going to clubs & bars...whereas, go to a nice restaurant, etc?
Click to expand...
then go to a restaurant:confused: easy!!!!!



Mozzy1 said:
4) you sure as he** don't want to be alone, in a depressive funk knowing your age & that you ARE alone...

What ideas does anyone have? Suggestions appreciated.
Click to expand...

I am not depressed about my age or alone!

I have an idea about suggestions that have been posted to you about a hundred times before except one that is, stop asking for 'answers' on morrissey solo, the answers are not here...***points to the outside world**** the answers you seek are out there.
 
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Nowadays people are getting married and having a family later and later.

I think women if they haven't got children by their mid thirties do start to panic.I had my first child at 26 which was way later than all my friends.i think that had I had left it till now (39) i wouldn't of had any.

It is unfair that our fertility declines in our mid thirties whereas men can have children at any age.
 
Mozzy1 said:
So, what are some birthday ideas then:

1) you don't want to see your family b/c they will "tease" you & make you feel worse but, you don't want to hurt their feelings b/c they want to see you?
Click to expand...

If your family makes you feel like shit then tell them so. If your family messes with you, tell them to get f***ed. No, I am not joking. Just because you are related to them does not mean you have any obligation towards them, nor any reason not to be truthful if they are a bunch of assholes.

Mozzy1 said:
2) you have no friends that are single so, you do NOT want to be a third-wheel?
Click to expand...

Um, why would your friends bring the people they are boning along with them? Are the people they are having sex with YOUR friends? Probably not. Go out with your friends, not your friends + the people they are having sex with.

Mozzy1 said:
3) you don't want to do things that are not your personality, like going to clubs & bars...whereas, go to a nice restaurant, etc?
Click to expand...

Then do something you want. It's not rocket science.

Mozzy1 said:
4) you sure as he** don't want to be alone, in a depressive funk knowing your age & that you ARE alone...
Click to expand...

What is wrong with being alone? People are so weak and needy, I swear it's so pathetic. Waaah, waaah, I am "alone", which is incorrect, as you have friends (you even admitted so), family, people around you at work, presumably people around you in your neighbourhood etc.

We all know that this tirade of self pity is based on the fact you are so desperate for a 'relationship', that you create this giant depression and self delusion of darkness and despair just because you can't live your fantasy.

Guess what, you probably never will. You want to know why? There is nothing more unattractive to a man (never mind looks) then a weak, desperate, self pitying, whining, complaining girl who thinks 35 and being alone is the end of the world. You might as well be a 35 year old steel worker from Jersey named "Big Barry", because with that attitude you would be about equally attractive to men as "Barry". Actually, "Barry" wouldn't be self pitying and such a pathetic display of woe and weakness, so he would probably stand a better chance.

Mozzy1 said:
What ideas does anyone have? Suggestions appreciated.
Click to expand...

See a mental health professional. I am not being mean, I am quite serious. If this isn't some game you are playing online, making things up just for the hell of it on a Morrissey forum, then you have some serious issues and a mental health professional could help you with those.
 
@Arsenal: I told her basically the exact same things a few weeks ago on a very similar thread plus in PMs too. (I might have been a bit more gentle with the wording but the message was basically the same.)
 
See one of my old threads on 'single women'...Kewpie may provide the link :D
 
It's just a number. Consider the alternative.

btw, anyone younger than me cannot bitch about getting older! How many people does that leave then...3? :p:D
 
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