"List of the Lost" reviews in The Guardian, The Daily Beast

I'll make up my own mind, but The Guardian are not impressed...

Morrissey: What we learned about him from List of the Lost by Michael Hann - The Guardian blog
Morrissey’s first novel is out and … well, it’s not very good. But the classic Moz tropes are present and correct

Excerpt:

"It’s commonplace in this kind of article to tell you we’re reading the book so you don’t have to. It’s a tease, usually. In the case of List of the Lost, however, it’s absolutely true. Do not read this book; do not sully yourself with it, no matter how temptingly brief it seems. All those who shepherded it to print should hang their heads in shame, for it’s hard to imagine anything this bad has been put between covers by anyone other than a vanity publisher. It is an unpolished turd of a book, the stale excrement of Morrissey’s imagination."

By the way ... I note at the very beginning "The author would like to thank Helen Conford"

The Dailybeast say...

Morrissey’s First Novel ‘List of the Lost’ Is a Bizarre, Misogynistic Ramble by Nico Hines - The Daily Beast
The writing is laughably clunky, the characters thinly drawn, the style stilted. But what’s worst about the ex-Smiths frontman’s List of the Lost is its repulsive treatment of women.

 

[NealCassidy]

I would quite like to get the poster but the image is not appealing at all, nor the easyJet colour scheme.

A candidate for the 'bad sex award' by all accounts...

- - - Updated - - -

Why do none of the reviews review the story? Or is it that hard to decipher?

 

[Old Mathew]

I think they do it on a rolling week, so for a book that's been out less than a day it's probably not bad and it will continue to climb. It's at 27 now.

Amazon updates every hour. It's at 19 now. Any book that reaches the top 100 is likely to sell tens of thousands of copies, not just thousands. Not necessarily in one day, of course....

 

[CrystalGeezer]

The final point of the Slate article is pretty funny. Nothing else today is. I'm sincerely embarrassed by it all.

 

[Bluebirds]

I'm going to wait for the audiobook. Hopefully it will be read by Richard Madeley

 

[itsmorrisseyyy]

Best run-on sentence ever. Seriously. I like it.

I actually really like it as well. And I'm never calling my vagina anything other than my 'otherwise central zone' ever again.

 

[Anonymous]

It looks as though Moz has produced a perfectly passable novel. It also looks in dire need of the editor´s pencil. It is obvious, however, that Moz said to Penguin - ´NO ONE EDITS MORRISSEY´. I think he may regret that. But we live and learn.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

You know who could make a KILLING in the novel industry on the tail of this release? Anyone who's ever signed a confidentiality agreement and been hosed by Morrissey. If it's wrapped up in fiction, it doesn't count, right? Kristeen seems smart enough to take a crack at being a novelist, I'm curious how the "ponytailed slave" would rewrite history in the form of a hard knock life orphan novella.

 

[Detritus]

I've already detailed my thoughts on the book elsewhere, so all I really have to add to this thread is that it's sad to see these early reviews resort to character assassination, not only because it's in poor taste, but also because there is so much wrong with quality of the writing itself that they have more than enough fodder for review.

Also, after seeing some truly absurd hyperbole from die-hards on Twitter, I am now convinced Morrissey could take a shit in a plastic bag and some fans would praise its genius and claim that it redefines bowel movements.

 

[Uncleskinny]

I've already detailed my thoughts on the book elsewhere, so all I really have to add to this thread is that it's sad to see these early reviews resort to character assassination, not only because it's in poor taste, but also because there is so much wrong with quality of the writing itself that they have more than enough fodder for review.

Also, after seeing some truly absurd hyperbole from die-hards on Twitter, I am now convinced Morrissey could take a shit in a plastic bag and some fans would praise its genius and claim that it redefines bowel movements.

Agree 100% with your admirable words. On both your points - yes, review the product, not the man, totally agree, after all, that's what we're buying. On the second point - yes, there's many of those. Cemented minds.

 

[Anonymous]

it's sad to see these early reviews resort to character assassination, not only because it's in poor taste, but also because there is so much wrong with quality of the writing itself that they have more than enough fodder for review.

I agree, to a point - but if 'Morrissey the novelist' brings all the baggage of 'Morrissey the outspoken pop singer' with him (tirades against judges, the meat industry & Margaret Thatcher; fat-shaming; homoeroticism; weird issues with women and sex), then it's not surprising that people are playing the man, rather than the ball, and judging it in context of his wider work.

Also, bear in mind Morrissey's huge display's of egotism. This is someone who demanded that his autobiography be published as an instant Penguin Classic. He considers himself a genius. He's just begging for a slapdown from the critics.

 

[Anonymous]

Morrissey's Novel: the verdict [1 *]


But what struck me is just how little these atrocious sex scenes stand out. The rest of the novel is just as overwrought, just as nonsensical, just as poorly conceived, awkwardly expressed and lazily imagined.

Some of Morrissey’s sentences defy all understanding: ... “What makes wild bluebells wild? And could they ever be tamed?” ......“Electrons from me need electrons from you in order to become electrons”..“animals do not need money”.

Morrissey recently announced that the final performances of his current solo tour will be his last in the UK. This fuelled speculation that he is about to retire as a singer-songwriter for good, to focus on the written word. We must beg him to reconsider."

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/books/what-to-read/morrissey-list-of-lost-review/

 

[Anonymous]

world peace was no 2 in the uk and i think 12 in the US and sold 25 ooo copies worldwide. total
music still sells far better than books so figure it out. and this book is not even for sale in the us.

 

[Orson Swells]

Re: Article: "List of the Lost" reviews in The Guardian, The Daily Beast

Well, the point is don't you think you ought to read the book before being in a position to draw such a conclusion?

Well, no, actually. You don't need to read an entire novel to know whether you like it or not. I think it's quite easy to tell from an excerpt. And that is what those Amazon extracts are there for after all.

This opening tells you everything you need to know about the style of the book. And that is enough for me. Had he compressed the ideas and themes into a 4 minute pop song I daresay it would have worked a lot better.

 

[Anonymous]

world peace was no 2 in the uk and i think 12 in the US and sold 25 ooo copies worldwide. total
music still sells far better than books so figure it out. and this book is not even for sale in the us.

Where are you getting that figure? Cos it ain't right

 

[MisguidedTrousers]

Switching from one discipline to another is all the rage...
Last week David Gilmours album was released. All lyrics by his wife, the novelist Polly Sampson. It's not what I'd call a good listen. Live or on record.
This week a novel is released by lyricist Morrissey, a not very successful attempt at all, according to around 95% of people who have already finished it.
It's quite arrogant, in my mind at least, to assume if you are talented in one field you can wander merrily into another and expect the same success....
Didn't Morrissey once point out this very point to Russel Brand after a failed attempt to make a concert audience laugh after Morrissey failed to finish a show due to running out of fishermans friends? Wrestle with Russel if I remember rightly?
I myself won't bother to read List of the Lost although I did enjoy autobiography a great deal.
Stick to what you're good at, or just retire with dignity.
September 2015, the season for crapping on your own legacy.

 

[Anonymous]

Switching from one discipline to another is all the rage...
Last week David Gilmours album was released. All lyrics by his wife, the novelist Polly Sampson. It's not what I'd call a good listen. Live or on record.
This week a novel is released by lyricist Morrissey, a not very successful attempt at all, according to around 95% of people who have already finished it.
It's quite arrogant, in my mind at least, to assume if you are talented in one field you can wander merrily into another and expect the same success....
Didn't Morrissey once point out this very point to Russel Brand after a failed attempt to make a concert audience laugh after Morrissey failed to finish a show due to running out of fishermans friends? Wrestle with Russel if I remember rightly?
I myself won't bother to read List of the Lost although I did enjoy autobiography a great deal.
Stick to what you're good at, or just retire with dignity.
September 2015, the season for crapping on your own legacy.

Says someone who hasn't a legacy at all. Just to point it out as you are so keen to talk about arrogance ...

 

[Anonymous]

MozAngel ‏@LizzyCatMoz 2 Std.
Bulbous Salutation is a colour. Pink !!
http://www.colourlovers.com/color/E79D8F/Bulbous_Salutation
#Morrissey #ListoftheLost

 

[vegan.cro]

Switching from one discipline to another is all the rage...
Last week David Gilmours album was released. All lyrics by his wife, the novelist Polly Sampson. It's not what I'd call a good listen. Live or on record.
This week a novel is released by lyricist Morrissey, a not very successful attempt at all, according to around 95% of people who have already finished it.
It's quite arrogant, in my mind at least, to assume if you are talented in one field you can wander merrily into another and expect the same success....
Didn't Morrissey once point out this very point to Russel Brand after a failed attempt to make a concert audience laugh after Morrissey failed to finish a show due to running out of fishermans friends? Wrestle with Russel if I remember rightly?
I myself won't bother to read List of the Lost although I did enjoy autobiography a great deal.
Stick to what you're good at, or just retire with dignity.
September 2015, the season for crapping on your own legacy.

_When it (the public) says a work of art is grossly unintelligible, it
means that the artist has said or made a beautiful thing that is new;
LIST OF THE LOST - very good book.

 

[vegan.cro]

MozAngel ‏@LizzyCatMoz 2 Std.
Bulbous Salutation is a colour. Pink !!
http://www.colourlovers.com/color/E79D8F/Bulbous_Salutation
#Morrissey #ListoftheLost

_On the whole, an artist in England gains something by being attacked (like Morrissey for "bulbous salutation").
His individuality is intensified. He becomes more completely himself. Of
course, the attacks are very gross, very impertinent, and very
contemptible. But then no artist expects grace from the vulgar mind, or
style from the suburban intellect._

 

[vegan.cro]

Morrissey's Novel: the verdict [1 *]


But what struck me is just how little these atrocious sex scenes stand out. The rest of the novel is just as overwrought, just as nonsensical, just as poorly conceived, awkwardly expressed and lazily imagined.

Some of Morrissey’s sentences defy all understanding: ... “What makes wild bluebells wild? And could they ever be tamed?” ......“Electrons from me need electrons from you in order to become electrons”..“animals do not need money”.

Morrissey recently announced that the final performances of his current solo tour will be his last in the UK. This fuelled speculation that he is about to retire as a singer-songwriter for good, to focus on the written word. We must beg him to reconsider."

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/books/what-to-read/morrissey-list-of-lost-review/

A work of art is the
unique result of a unique temperament. Its beauty comes
from the fact that the author is what he is.... The moment that an
artist takes notice of what other people want, and tries to supply the
demand, he ceases to be an artist.
Morrissey is artist.