Re: I want ice cream Suzy, and Ugly Americans, what's that got to do with the price of Haddock...?

Dear People

I was referring to Ice Cream and Sex with Pauline Quirke. Where the hell has this thing about Ice Cream and facially challenged Yanks come from. The art of lovemaking to a woman you are attracted to, is a beautiful thing. Please do not sully and drag it down to gutterlevel with going off on a tangent about other more boring issues. Who gives a @#!!! if there are ugly Americans, there are quite a few ugly British people as well. Let's hear about people's best erotic experiences please. Write in to the discussion board with that one favourite sexual experience that sticks in your mind, throat, trouser-leg, whatever. Let's have some sensible humurous debate.

SEX....DOES IT HAVE A PLACE IN MODERN SOCIETY ON A REGULAR BASIS? OR AM I BEING TOO BLOODY CHOOSEY ABOUT WHO I SLEEP WITH, CONSIDERING I HAVENT HAD SEX SINCE LAST OCTOBER.......

I LOVE YOU ALL IN VARIOUS WAYS, AND LATERALLY WHEN I CAN!!!!

TeddyMorrissey xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

> Dear People

> I was referring to Ice Cream and Sex with Pauline Quirke. Where
> the hell has this thing about Ice Cream and facially challenged
> Yanks come from. The art of lovemaking to a woman you are
> attracted to, is a beautiful thing. Please do not sully and drag
> it down to gutterlevel with going off on a tangent about other
> more boring issues. Who gives a @#!!! if there are ugly
> Americans, there are quite a few ugly British people as well.
> Let's hear about people's best erotic experiences please. Write
> in to the discussion board with that one favourite sexual
> experience that sticks in your mind, throat, trouser-leg,
> whatever. Let's have some sensible humurous debate.

> SEX....DOES IT HAVE A PLACE IN MODERN SOCIETY ON A REGULAR
> BASIS? OR AM I BEING TOO BLOODY CHOOSEY ABOUT WHO I SLEEP WITH,
> CONSIDERING I HAVENT HAD SEX SINCE LAST OCTOBER.......

> I LOVE YOU ALL IN VARIOUS WAYS, AND LATERALLY WHEN I CAN!!!!

> TeddyMorrissey
> xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

No sex since last October? I'd never have guessed Teddy.

> Dear People

> I was referring to Ice Cream and Sex with Pauline Quirke. Where
> the hell has this thing about Ice Cream and facially challenged
> Yanks come from. The art of lovemaking to a woman you are
> attracted to, is a beautiful thing. Please do not sully and drag
> it down to gutterlevel with going off on a tangent about other
> more boring issues.

What the f.uck? that was on a completely different thread. God, you people are nuts.

And I wasn't even referring to your damn post anyway. Like we're going to see your pearls of wisdom pop up in the New York Times, bumping out Dave Barry's column from the editorial section.

>Who gives a @#!!! if there are ugly
> Americans, there are quite a few ugly British people as well.
> Let's hear about people's best erotic experiences please. Write
> in to the discussion board with that one favourite sexual
> experience that sticks in your mind, throat, trouser-leg,
> whatever. Let's have some sensible humurous debate.

If I had one, I would tell it to ya.

> SEX....DOES IT HAVE A PLACE IN MODERN SOCIETY ON A REGULAR
> BASIS? OR AM I BEING TOO BLOODY CHOOSEY ABOUT WHO I SLEEP WITH,
> CONSIDERING I HAVENT HAD SEX SINCE LAST OCTOBER.......

i know what you mean. if i can't identify them in a police line-up, i want nothing to do with them. i pay for my pickiness by being the tensest person i know, but what can you do? It's quite lonely when you have standards.

Re: Do you want to hear something REALLY messed up?

You'll be pleased to hear this is in reference to sex. It's very phucked up, actually it's down right scary, but therein lies the humour.

There is this woman, let's call her...say...spolleen. When she has sex (not with me, this was recounted to me by a very bemused ex of the big big freak, who btw said having sex with her was about as pleasurable as having teeth pulled)she has to have more towels to hand than a midwife on delivery day! And don't even mention all the intermittent hand washing (now that's just gotta be such a turn on, no?)

Can you say OCD passion killer?!

I bet if she were ever to give anyone a blow job in a public convinience it'd have to be one of those swanky ones where they have attendants who hand out towels (they have to be fresh towels mind and pleanty of 'em...pfft)

Is it just me or does this girl have big problems?

Re: oh well, nuff read

> You'll be pleased to hear this is in reference to sex. It's very
> phucked up, actually it's down right scary, but therein lies the
> humour.

Hmm. Disappointment creeps into the reading effort...

> Is it just me or does this girl have big problems?

I guess it's mainly the boys who'll have big problems.

ciao ciao, Cinderellina!

Re: HUh?

> Hmm. Disappointment creeps into the reading effort...

Does it?

> I guess it's mainly the boys who'll have big problems.

No it's definitely her...see they can leave, she's still stuck there with all her towels thinking everything is fine, it's not fine, it's decidedly unhealthy...it's rather sad really.

But then the fact that this woman is the biggest, most egomaniacal bitch you would never want to meet kinda makes you not really care.