Blogs

  1. bday

    a continuing record of the passage of time, this is what 47 looks like, anyways, no rest for the weary, make up classes to teach on today and tomorrow...
  2. James Dean's new movie, Finding Jack

    A friend text me the other day and told me that James Dean would appear in a new movie in 2020. I assumed he would be appearing as himself in a passing scene. Kind of like what you'd see in Forrest Gump where Forrest is standing with JFK. I was happy to hear about it and let it go - didn't think much more about it. Then my mom, who is always watching the news or reading about the news, or eating the news, or talking about the news in her sleep...asked me, "Did you know James Dean's been...
  3. Halloween

    still getting use to sober Halloweens, did a spur of the moment really scary clown, the kids liked it, which is what matters most...
  4. Miss this boy...

    I was in a great mood on that unforgettable Halloween in 1993. I spent my whole day in the theatre because I was in a play and most of my classes took place in the theatre as well. I went out for dinner before having to return for the play. I remember flipping through the stations on the radio. I'd hear, "River", but I turned the stations so fast that I didn't hear what went along with River, and I really didn't think they were talking about River Phoenix, anyway. I kept hearing his...
  5. Safe and Well - Home and Dry

    How I dearly wish Morrissey was more like Neil Tennant. I guess we're with stupid.
  6. wtf, why do I have to do this twice!

    Dear China, 4 am here, day after National Day and well, just couldn't sleep. the fireworks are over, though the smell still permeates the air as I smoke this 555 ciggie. its like this, I knew what I was getting into when I came here, I thought, but before I was in Chengdu, Sichuam province, pretty, happy, outgoing people made of a possibly unique population of various ethnic groups which came together to from their own. Jiangsu aint like that, here everybody is the same and in my city they...
  7. 64

    In honor of James Dean, I gave blood today. It is the 64th anniversary of his death. Please Remember...
  8. I’ve changed my plea...

    Guilty Guilty Guilty “When people are ready to, they change. They never do it before then, and sometimes they die before they get around to it. You can't make them change if they don't want to, just like when they do want to, you can't stop them." ~Andy Warhol ~
  9. part 1: my helene fischer years

    hundreds of old slides were given to me by my mum with the order to dust, chronologically sort, catalogue and digitalize them, so that she can look at them again in a nice album, which i will have to assemble online and then have it printed and sent to her afterwards. well, thanks mum. not that i have some other fish to fry in this crucial phase of my life. my pleasure. i entitled this picture "my helene fischer years". here, skinny me is chanting a welcome address to the rising sun on the...
  10. Dear dead dad

    Today is the 18th birthday you didn’t live to see, would’ve made you a ripe old age of 72, real up there age wise for the men in our fam as our history goes. Anyways, I’d like to say that I finally got it all worked out, you dont have to worry, I mean I am 46 now, but well, I don’t, but often when I do its because I remember something you said to me when you were alive. I just didn’t listen to at the time, but I did hear it and remember lots of it. You were so right about so much. I can...
  11. intro: why?

    in this new blog series i'm gonna explore the importance of music in my life. it's not a limitless source of memories. it is very limited. i hope a yet hidden leitmotif will emerge from such an idle activity. it's supposed to trigger off a chemical crystallization process of the mind. other memories might materialize from that as well.
  12. China update

    the entry stuff into China, banking stuff, getting internet, all that, its much harder now than it was 3 years ago, so much so that if I'd known it would be like this then I might not have come, but I'm dealing with it and I at least know one competent person here, my boss, I've always chose bosses more than jobs and its done me good here for sure, muddling through it all while taking on lots of classes is bit of a stress, but thankful I'm sober, couldn't do all this otherwise...
  13. After All This Time

    I`m feeling pretty blue at the moment. Blue and empty inside. I feel the time passing by and I`m still here. It`s been better and it`s been much worse but it never goes away. Ever since I became ill I feel like I've never had a moment of peace. My mind is always going on a loop thinking of the worse case scenario`s . I haven`t hurt myself physically in years now and I don`t want to really return to that unhealthy type of coping mechanism but sometimes I miss it like an old friend. I mean it...
  14. buh bye

    first SFO then Wuhan, finally Shanghai, in the end had to get all the Visa stuff done myself, you want something done right? you gotta do it yourself...
  15. Bourdain

    One year ago today you left us. Still sad. Still confused. I fear I will never know why you chose to go. :( My goodness, I sure would like to sit down with you and share a beer or a cup of coffee. You were one of a kind. You are missed and loved by millions.
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