Blogs

  1. China update

    the entry stuff into China, banking stuff, getting internet, all that, its much harder now than it was 3 years ago, so much so that if I'd known it would be like this then I might not have come, but I'm dealing with it and I at least know one competent person here, my boss, I've always chose bosses more than jobs and its done me good here for sure, muddling through it all while taking on lots of classes is bit of a stress, but thankful I'm sober, couldn't do all this otherwise...
  2. After All This Time

    I`m feeling pretty blue at the moment. Blue and empty inside. I feel the time passing by and I`m still here. It`s been better and it`s been much worse but it never goes away. Ever since I became ill I feel like I've never had a moment of peace. My mind is always going on a loop thinking of the worse case scenario`s . I haven`t hurt myself physically in years now and I don`t want to really return to that unhealthy type of coping mechanism but sometimes I miss it like an old friend. I mean it...
  3. buh bye

    first SFO then Wuhan, finally Shanghai, in the end had to get all the Visa stuff done myself, you want something done right? you gotta do it yourself...
  4. Bourdain

    One year ago today you left us. Still sad. Still confused. I fear I will never know why you chose to go. :( My goodness, I sure would like to sit down with you and share a beer or a cup of coffee. You were one of a kind. You are missed and loved by millions.
  5. Bliss On A Summer’s Morn

    I lingered in bed much longer than I needed to this morning. I had originally woke up five hours before. But it was just one of those mornings too delicious not to sink back into for a while longer. It was the air. Slightly humid, just thick enough to almost make you believe you could float if you wanted to but not so heavy as to press you down. And the temperature had dropped overnight into the 50s so it was perfect for sleeping nestled under a duvet. As the sun slowly rose up, bits of...
  6. GoT, ranking the seasons

    #1 Season 6, the best battle sequence “Battle of the Bastards” Hodor saving the day, revenge on the Freys, the Sept blowing up, the Snake Sisters, lots of Melisandre, verbal sparring/friendship between Tyrion and Varys, oh and one of my fave actresses was in it for a bit, Essie Davis #2. Season 3, The Red Wedding(thankfully, I knew about it from reading the books years earlier, otherwise I might have had an aneurysm, but it was brilliantly done) Dany getting the Unsullied, The whole Ramsay...
  7. There Must Be Something.......

    What`s wrong with you ? Why don`t you smile more ? I can`t answer those questions : out loud to anyone anyway. I can admit it to myself though. What`s wrong with me ? For one thing I am terribly unhappy. For another I've been feeling horribly lonely lately. I do have my family and believe me I`m really grateful for that and I know some people have it much worse than I do. I am very aware of that. I know what makes me feel so alone. It`s what`s wrong with me and it`s what sometimes makes my...
  8. cold turkey

    so I did the step down thing to the 3 mg ones for the last few weeks, but they ran out Friday, so now its no nicotine at all, and since I gave up the clove ciggies before even that, my head just hurts now all the time, everything is annoying, getting off these things should be easier than cigs, much less nicotine in them, but I think that since so much makes it into the blood stream, as opposed to when I smoke a clove like I use to, that these withdrawals are really off of more nicotine,...
  9. WARNING: GoT SPOILERS

    Well, this one was horrifying but brilliant, which is perfect, power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely, no matter the person and in Dany’s case genetics and environment predetermined her descent to evil. Her father was the Mad King, an inbred tyrant, she was raised by her witless, cruel brother, then she went from one terrible situation to another, filled with masses of murder and betrayal. Of course, she did the wrong thing at KIng’s Landing, the surprise is not that it...
  10. Blogs imported into new system

    For compatibility with a major site upgrade coming later in the year, the blogs system needed to be moved to a new system. All previous data should be imported. Blog related URLs have changed so update your links if you have them. Please let me know if you encounter any issues.
  11. Tired and Useless

    I`m listening to Morrissey`s song "Lost" right now. Which is exactly how I feel right now. I`m in an awful depression right now. I`m tired all the time and can`t find the motivation to get a whole lot done right now . I mean I try but I think some people might just think I`m being lazy. I hate to think people are thinking of me that way. I've written about what a wonderful Mom and sisters and nieces and nephews that I have but I feel so lonely right now. I feel like no one understands that...
  12. TAT and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

    The 24 hours following 5:30 pm on Thursday were unusually bad. Upon arriving home that day I had discovered that the burglars had been back and taken more treasured finds from my life. The trauma washed over me with the familiar feeling that the world was cruelly acting upon me again. I had no power to keep my home, my sanctuary, safe and protected from outside intrusion. I wrestled with options of how to respond. How to find my power in the situation I hadn’t chosen but was forced to deal...
  13. 51 years ago

    From remembered stories told to me by my father and the internet, I’ve been able to piece together that he served in the 2nd Battalion, 4th Marines or the “The Magnificent Bastards” as they’ve been called since fighting valiantly on against all odds at Corregidor in WW2 versus the Japanese. Thereby allowing MacArthur to escape on a PT boat, though he did eventually return, but I digress, my dad didn’t fight in that war, but a later one, not one we think so fondly of, there were no...
  14. going backwards

    Ok, this is not good, but I know why, still drinking soda like every other day though I know its poison and some stress eating as I await this visa nightmare to end. Also, a year ago? would've been ecstatic to be at 200...
  15. Rest In Peace Red Woman (spoilers)

    I knew ppl were gonna die, but did they have to kill the hottest woman on the show? whatever, guess with the Night King killed she had no part in the much less consequential battle for the Iron Throne, which to tbh? I care far less about, obviously I wanna see Cersei defeated, but the last 3 episodes are a bit anti-climatic for me...
Loading...