posted by davidt on Friday January 05 2001, @09:00PM
David Alice writes:

You may remember me as the author of last year's "Diana's Death Foretold by Morrissey: A Small Sample of the Evidence". Your feedback to that poorly planned article taught me a few lessons about submitting evidence:
1. A chain is only as strong as its weakest link.
2. Keep it simple.
3. Sometimes, less is more.
Hopefully those lessons have served me well at my new, illustrated, webpage presentation of the Diana-Morrissey phenomenon.

The site is called 'Diana's Death Foretold in the Work of Morrissey'.

Please visit the site and let me know if I've succeeded in presenting a convincing case. I genuinely believe that the Diana-Morrissey phenomenon is the most compelling case of prophecy ever documented. Please review my website and let me know if you agree.
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  • Amazing website (Score:0, Redundant)

    Yes, yes, yes, oh yes! David, this time you've convinced me! Splendid work! If the Diana-Morrissey phenomenon isn't genuine prophecy then there's no such thing as prophecy. This goes way beyond the realm of coincidence! Thank you for opening my eyes. Three cheers to you! But, please tell us more!
    Frosty One -- Friday January 05 2001, @10:03PM (#6269)
    (User #2123 Info)
  • Congratulations are in order to Mr. Alice for his unbelievable website. He's made a believer out of me. I always felt Morrissey was a unique individual, but this is way beyond anything I could have imagined about him.
    Do you think Morrissey and David Alice are working together on this? How else did Mr. Alice piece it altogether?
    The announcement of the Diana-Morrissey Phenomenon website is the greatest revelation ever posted at Morrissey-solo, and quite possibly the greatest story ever told about anyone anywhere! I'm not going to sleep tonight!
    bewildered -- Friday January 05 2001, @10:28PM (#6270)
    (User #2124 Info)
  • You know, this might have been SLIGHTLY interesting if it had only been about someone Morrissey actually admired...

    David Alice - you seem to have too much time on your hands.
    hand in glove -- Friday January 05 2001, @11:42PM (#6273)
    (User #827 Info)
    "Sometimes things fall apart so that better things can fall together" - Marilyn Monroe
  • What a genuinely funny website!
    Lunacy or comic genius?
    Either way you made my day!

    jungfiend <[email protected]> -- Friday January 05 2001, @11:47PM (#6274)
    (User #580 Info)
    • Re:priceless! by David Alice (Score:1) Sunday January 07 2001, @01:08PM
      • Re:priceless! by jungfiend (Score:1) Saturday January 13 2001, @09:02PM
        • To "jungfiend" by David Alice (Score:1) Sunday January 14 2001, @12:46PM
  • This may very well be one of the most unspeakably Doy things i have ever witnessed. This person aught to jump off a cliff. Or something.
    RodnieTheGrommit -- Saturday January 06 2001, @01:43AM (#6279)
    (User #2125 Info)
    "I hexa-poap, and then i fricking don't poap!" -Steffens(3.a2 sec aev 8-2)
  • that was really quite silly. if you look at something hard enough you can find whatever you want to.

      i just wonder why he wanted to?
    spaceboy -- Saturday January 06 2001, @02:29AM (#6280)
    (User #124 Info |
  • I hope you don't believe what you write. That would be quite worrying.
    Anonymous -- Saturday January 06 2001, @02:51AM (#6281)
  • ....but I just have to say it again: complete bollocks! I bet Morrissey is having a right laugh at it himself..... and the funniest things is you putting flabbergasted comments under false names! If I may say so: you have a problem!
    Mozzarella -- Saturday January 06 2001, @02:59AM (#6282)
    (User #864 Info |
    If I wasn't a cat, I'd be a girl.
  • And I really mean that. This might not be the greatest story ever told or the biggest piece of news on Morrissey-solo, but I certainly find it clever. Especially in these tough times where we cling to the faintest Moz reference in lack of any real news. And I love your comments on Morrissey-solo too :) Two thumbs up!

    Go ahead and check David T - this is actually not another pseudonym...

    I only miss the rest of the story on the website. As I recall, there were tons of more indications, right? And David Alice...someone was right: You do have too much time on your hands :)

    Oh and some people need to lighten up a bit...
    Joemoz -- Saturday January 06 2001, @03:39AM (#6283)
    (User #1342 Info)
  • Wow you put all coincedences and put them all together in to a little meatball story, You wasted alot of time and effort on a bogus story. You just went and made it all convenient that all of your story linked. Nice try but you don't have me fooled.
    Anonymous -- Saturday January 06 2001, @04:15AM (#6285)
  • This is so true! Morrissey killed Diana! He has always express his putrid hatred for the royal family, but this time he has gone too far! Shall we alert the authorities?
    Anonymous -- Saturday January 06 2001, @05:14AM (#6286)
  • You must know that Morrissey would get tremendous joy out of seeing the Diana-Morrissey Phenomenon become world famous. So, let's make the dream real. It will be our gift to Morrissey. We can have so much fun with it! Get creative; publicize it in whatever ways you can think of. Send messages to the tabloids alerting them to report on David Alice's website. We won't stop until the Diana-Morrissey Phenomenon is as famous as the Loch Ness Monster! Think of the wildly wonderful amusement it would bring Morrissey!
    Anonymous -- Saturday January 06 2001, @10:39AM (#6290)

    I seem to remember another cantidate for
    the Cracker Box Palace living,about 30 years
    ago,with a bunch of equally,chemically,dilluded
    followers in a valley near L.A.
    You know the guy who thought The Beatles were
    directing him to kick-start Armageddon through
    thier "White" album by snuffing a few Hollywood
    fat cats ?
    One can only hope,for the sake of his relatives,
    that mr.Alice is'nt currently trying to gleen
    some deeper meening from his copy of Kill Uncle.
    QUICKQUINN -- Saturday January 06 2001, @01:43PM (#6293)
    (User #2127 Info)
  • Interesting and curious, however I believe the meaning or central meaning of the song Alma Maters is much different than what you speculate and the queer spelling of whole is also a much different reference. Alma maters implies where one receives ones higher education, or where we learn or find the thoughts and ideas that we base our central principles on. The spelling of hole is an obvious and overtly sexual word play intending to draw light to the importance of sex, or the ridiculousness of the fact, that sex somehow plays a role in how we become who we are.
    I also somehow doubt Morrissey spending as much time thinking about the Princess as all this would certainly necessitate.
    giant -- Saturday January 06 2001, @02:24PM (#6295)
    (User #430 Info)
    I Like You
  • Additional evidence can be found in the center fold of Morrissey's "Beethoven Was Deaf." Which of course is a live performance from Paris FRANCE. Morrissey is obviously acting out Diana's death in the 4 unexplained pictures of Morrissey wailing his arm off the side of the stage whilst faced down.

    I will think up some more soon but I need some more red wine at the moment...

    Anonymous -- Saturday January 06 2001, @11:31PM (#6298)
  • David Alice, your mind frightens me.

    TOTBCR -- Sunday January 07 2001, @01:06AM (#6301)
    (User #1956 Info)
    • Re:david by David Alice (Score:1) Sunday January 07 2001, @01:27PM
      • Re:david by TOTBCR (Score:1) Sunday January 07 2001, @06:53PM
        • Re:david by David Alice (Score:1) Monday January 08 2001, @09:19AM
  • I got a real kick out of that website! Of course I doubt very seriously Moz was forseeing the death of Princess Diana, but very good none-the-less.

    After visiting David's website, I happened along another interesting site which I think would be suitable for this story...
    It definately belongs there, right along with "the truth" about the bullet that killed Kennedy.

    It's all pretty funny.
    ShielaTakingABow <[email protected]> -- Sunday January 07 2001, @04:22AM (#6303)
    (User #1780 Info |
    "We´re all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars" OW
  • I hope so, I would hate to think a British person could be responsible for this disgraceful site. Very sad indeed.
    hibernia -- Sunday January 07 2001, @07:48AM (#6304)
    (User #820 Info)
    Billy Jones
    • Sad Indeed. (Score:2, Insightful)

      Aren't you the one who complained about another person making anti-British remarks under a post called "Dedicated Swallower of Fascism" concerning the British and bad teeth? Well, what's this last post of yours? Are you implying that only an American could come up with such bosh as this?? Isn't that an anti-American remark? Dear me, you should practice what you preach. Perhaps this person is American, but you can be rest assured that there are stupid people every where you go in this world.
      hand in glove -- Sunday January 07 2001, @10:16AM (#6307)
      (User #827 Info)
      "Sometimes things fall apart so that better things can fall together" - Marilyn Monroe
    • Re:Are you American ? by David Alice (Score:1) Sunday January 07 2001, @02:08PM
    • Re: American Shmerican by Anonymous (Score:0) Sunday January 07 2001, @06:57PM
  • What a load of shit. Keep taking the tablets.
    wreck of a man -- Sunday January 07 2001, @11:51AM (#6310)
    (User #810 Info)
    Keep England Clean - Kill A Hippy
    • Re:Are you on drugs ? by David Alice (Score:1) Sunday January 07 2001, @01:21PM
      • Im a genius by wreck of a man (Score:1) Monday January 08 2001, @12:47PM
        • Re:Im a genius by Anonymous (Score:0) Monday January 08 2001, @04:19PM
          • Re:Im a genius by David Alice (Score:1) Monday January 08 2001, @04:41PM
            • Marc Bolan by wreck of a man (Score:1) Wednesday January 10 2001, @11:35AM
  • David Alice's theories are no less plausible than those propounded by Md. Fayad.
    The only thing madder would be writing abusive posts about your website.
    These are the people I'm really worried about.
    What are THEY trying to prove ?

    PS Are you the David in "Nat. Front Disco"?
    This could be worth some analysis.

    Anonymous -- Sunday January 07 2001, @01:08PM (#6316)
  • I have to say that I'm dismayed to see that you take this very seriously. I won't bother to point out the many many holes in logic in your theory since I think they're glaringly obvious to everyone except you (um, the title is The QUEEN Is Dead, by the way), but I have to ask you this: SO WHAT? Even if Morrissey really had had some sort of premonition about Diana's death.... what would that prove? How will it make my life better to know that Morrissey has been sneakily placing cryptic messages in his songs regarding the death of a public figure he repeatedly referred to as "boring"? You overestimate his regard for Diana. And his clairvoyance, I think.
    And David, why does this get posted here? Shouldn't we start a new page for lunatic conpiracy theories rather than NEWS?
    jypu -- Sunday January 07 2001, @01:56PM (#6329)
    (User #348 Info)
  • That you didn't post this evidence even *before* Diana was killed :D That would have been just slightly more convincing...
    Joemoz -- Sunday January 07 2001, @03:17PM (#6333)
    (User #1342 Info)
  • Come on, get a life. The only connection I ever got was the word Alma.
    Dorothea Yoghurt -- Sunday January 07 2001, @03:50PM (#6334)
    (User #132 Info)
  • well that was certainly freaky, but all in all it was one big fat coincidence. really now, nothing more than that!

    *but would this mean that edgar cacey "the sleeping prophet" would now be replaced by Steven Morrissey, "the SINGING prophet"???? THINK ON THAT NOW! LOL!!!!!
    Maplefreak -- Sunday January 07 2001, @05:08PM (#6336)
    (User #1234 Info)
    And the songs we sing, they're not supposed to mean a thing...
  • Here's an Anti-Diana-Morrissey-phenomenon-Theory. Four years ago, in 1997, I had the pleasure of living in Dublin for half a year. By accident one day I saw the video of Alma Matters on TV. I read that the programme would be repeated some days later. Highly excited I was preparing the event making my lovely landlady crazy, who growingly rapturous by the sight of Morrissey was ironing my Morrissey-T-shirt. She instantly allowed me to use the VCR for recording the video. Nothing much more than the video that time mattered to me!... When the day was up, I turned on the TV, but what I saw wasn't the video of Morrissey, but the live-pictures of Diana's accident in Paris (Diana still alive)... Get real! – Morrissey allowing Diana removing him from telly!?! (...By the way, I never got over it... not getting the video).
    Anonymous -- Sunday January 07 2001, @08:11PM (#6348)
  • A very good piece of fiction from someone who seems to have needed to take a break from coming up with hair-brained theories about who killed JFK.

    I give it a 8 for originality and doing his homework on the facts.

    I'll give it a 2 on the sanity scale, definetly not Charles Manson esque, but most likely sleeps with the lights on and wears a tin foil hat.

    Let me know if you live in the Los Angeles area, I can give you the name of a good shrink.
    nowhere fast -- Sunday January 07 2001, @08:11PM (#6349)
    (User #86 Info)
    Women only like me for my mind.
  • This is probably the funniest story I have read for weeks! It is nothing but lovely. And all the fake comments, touching excuses and confused, hostile reactions make it even better. Andy Kaufmann must be smiling in his grave.

    I will send this link to a lot of people. Thumbs up!
    Anonymous -- Monday January 08 2001, @01:59AM (#6366)
    • Re:Lovely! by David Alice (Score:1) Monday January 08 2001, @09:03AM
    • Re:Lovely! by Anonymous (Score:0) Monday January 08 2001, @11:43AM
  • I am amused.. I cannot help it.. comments that oscillate wildly from bollocks (Long Live Mozzarella) to witty genius.. David, I salute you for provoking such a synthetic storm...

    We have a publication in this country (I am English) called the 'Sunday Sport'... which loves articles such as this.. I would suggest you could realistically get this published (try your luck), but then, I'd hate Morrisseys good name to be dragged down to the gutter press level..

    Sorry about my frivolity.. After all, this was supposed to be a spoof article wasn't it.. ?

    So, more power to your writing hand.. Now, can you make up something else for me to read, with another 10 minutes of your lifetimes research.. I hear that Elvis is alive and well and living on Mars?..
    Ruffian <[email protected]> -- Monday January 08 2001, @05:28AM (#6370)
    (User #1813 Info)
    "In the days when you were hopelessly poor, I just liked you more..."
  • I can't believe this. I think there may be something to this claim that he wants to be Andy Kaufman. I've never seen this many responses to a story. His arguement is bosh, but the whole concept is a well needed kick in the face. Whatever that means.
    Matt Smith -- Monday January 08 2001, @05:49AM (#6371)
    (User #1832 Info)
    Oh god, how much longer?
  • Hi,

    I was just wondering if you had passed on your theories to Md. Al Fayed, and what was his reaction?
    Anonymous -- Monday January 08 2001, @08:51AM (#6377)
  • Life is not complex. We are complex. Life is simple, and the simple thing is the right thing. OSCAR WILDE


    Diana died, it's that simple!
    Mekena -- Monday January 08 2001, @01:03PM (#6395)
    (User #1595 Info)
  • Have you noticed that on almost every Smiths or Moz album the letters 'DI' for Diana are hidden in one or more song titles! On the first album we have 'hanDInglove' and 'whatDIfference..'. Elsewhere Moz keeps us on our toes by hiding them in reverse order ('ID') (girlafraID, whatshesaID) and even reverse initials! (I(nteresting) Drug))!

    Spookier still in 'Death of a Disco Dancer' we have DI S. (Diana Spencer). Therefore the coded beginning of this title refers to Death of Diana Spencer. the remaining letters 'co dancer' are a pun on 'CODE ANSWER' suggesting that the answer is hidden in code within this song. And what is unusual about this song? Morrissey himself plays an instrument. Obviously there is an encrypted message from Morrissey in the notes of his piano solo! This is foreshadowed by that fact that in the Queen Is Dead, Morrissey tells Diana's mother-in-law 'You should hear me play piano'. A further clue lies in the fact that Morrissey pronounces the word as 'pianner' to rhyme with 'Diana'!

    The other Moz song to contain Di S. is 'Disappointed', so Diana Spencer appointed..
    Appointed to do what we may ask?
    Appointed to DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!! of course!

    Still, I'm sure you already know all this David. If not, please feel free to add it to your mountain of evidence- free of charge.
    John Fidler -- Monday January 08 2001, @06:40PM (#6407)
    (User #2134 Info)
  • My fifteen minutes of fame here at Morrissey-solo may end at any time. Soon, I will be banished to the archives. So, I need to take this opportunity to clarify a few things:

    1. I mean for the Diana-Morrissey Phenomenon to be taken seriously. The world’s fate depends upon it. When I complete a presentation of all the evidence you will see that it reveals matters of far greater global consequence than the tragic death of Princess Diana. As much as we've joked about me and my work, it really is no laughing matter.

    2. The ‘Andy Kaufman’ suspicions were a lot of fun and wildly flattering. But I am not nearly clever enough to have planned for our host David Tseng to catch me using those false identities and to have planned on him posting a message exposing me and thereby setting the stage for me to post an apology that would shape your perceptions about me. I’m just not that clever! All you have to do is look back at all those lame comments of mine in which I was genuinely trying to be humorous and you'll see – I’m no Andy Kaufman!
    And besides, even if I was being Andy Kaufman, how would that negate the incredible facts of the Diana-Morrissey Phenomenon presented at my website anyway? Think about it.

    3. The sad truth about my life is exactly as I told you. In the words of the master:

    “No, I never had a job because I’m too shy”

    [I once had a few part-time temporary jobs, but that was more than 10 years ago. Previous to that I had to quit high-school just a few days into the start of grade 12 because my shyness made it impossible for me to be amongst the other students.
    I’ve always been supported by either my parents or my sister, entirely at their expense. Currently, my sister supports me while I do my Diana-Morrissey work.]

    And again, to quote the master:

    “I never had no one ever”

    [Never! Never held hands. Never hugged. Never kissed. Never touched. Three times in my life I tried to ask a girl to be my friend. In each case, it took me years to work up the courage to ask and in each case, I was rejected in a matter of seconds. But the funny thing is, the excruciating pain of rejection was always accompanied by tremendous relief because I knew what would have happened if one of them had consented to be my friend and then had tried to get intimate with me… Because I’m so squeamish about physical touching I would have vomited all over them. I know that, because I used to experience sickening hot flashes and temporary blindness if anyone even mentioned anything to do with genitals. I remember having to excuse myself from a high-school biology class one time when the teacher’s lesson plan unexpectedly strayed into a discussion of reproductive organs - I immediately got the dizzying hot flashes and was on the onset of suffering the blindness, so I went stumbling out of the classroom to find a fountain and doused myself with the cold water until the symptoms subsided. Not until I was 32 years old was I finally able to be confronted with a picture of a naked lady without getting nauseous and blacking out.]

    That’s the pathetic truth about my life. But, don’t feel sad for me. I have the constantly amazing companionship of my sister’s dog, Kirby. Sometimes, when he snuggles against me during our afternoon naptime, I cry when I think about all the dogs in the world who are chained in backyards, around the clock, with no companionship. And what about the dogs trapped and tortured in vivisection laboratories? I know too much about what people do to animals (I can never be happy). That's why I'm a vegan.

    4. I want to express my sincere gratitude to our host David Tseng for allowing me this free reign to converse with all of you who took the time to visit my website and who posted a comment here or who sent me a private email. And of course, I want to thank all of you who did what I just said you did.

    I apologize if any of my lame attempts at humour gave you the impression that I was insincere about my beliefs in the importance of the Diana-Morrissey Phenomenon. I was just following your lead so as to keep us connected on this until I can present you with the next installment of evidence at my website.
    David Alice -- Tuesday January 09 2001, @11:45AM (#6444)
    (User #2129 Info)
  • Why would you change your name if your name is Mavis Fluck?
    Anonymous -- Tuesday January 09 2001, @04:57PM (#6449)
  • David Alice's theory can easily be explained if Morrissey ever read the novel "Moby Dick" by Herman Melville. Princess Diana's death was predicted in Moby Dick - as explained at this site:
    Anonymous -- Friday January 12 2001, @12:18PM (#6514)
  • Morrissey really IS a complete genius... :)

    It is stories like this that remind me why I love the internet so much: such wonderful and insane fantasy.

    Keep them coming, I love 'em.

    Anonymous -- Saturday February 24 2001, @04:25PM (#8251)
  • very convincing case, not sure if i believe it though as you can interpret lyrics in such a wide array of areas.
    Anonymous -- Friday August 17 2001, @04:51AM (#17124)

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