Yes, I've finally done it. I needed to be "forced"  but the circumstances couldn't have been better for my first running-steps . Tommi needed my car today so I couldn't go to the gym, plus the weather just SCREAMS at you if you stay inside. I saw moskitos dancing at a lake that I've discovered, a first sign of springtime although the air was cutting cold in my throat. I did better than I thought. You know, I have had this aversion against running, jogging since I had to vomit after a 1000m run in school. I was maybe 13 then? I never had much problems at 1h of aerobics, step-aerobics, tae-bo or whatever - I just couldn't imagine myself running more than 5 minutes without getting a heart attack. Until that one day last summer when our trainer in the gym decided to trade the usual warm-up in front of the mirrors to a 20 min round. I was probably slower than any pedestrians crossing the streets, but I managed to do what I never found imaginable - I survived! But as you can see, it took me another 5 months until I decided to try it on my own. And how beautiful it was! I have the perfect area just outside of my doorstep - miles of open fields. I saw rabbits bouncing around and proudly nodded my head to all the other joggers, dogs and cyclers. I'm very happy even though it was only 25 minutes. 5 min running, 1 min walking... My soundtrack contained Chemical Brothers, Primal Scream, Anthony Reynolds, Ryan Adams, Jet, Von Bondies, Suede and some Richard Hawley for the cool down. 

Speaking of music - I got the latest Pony Club album in the mail yesterday. I really really like them! (yeah, I know, not the best review just yet...) "Buried in the suburbs" sounds very much like CCTV.

So finally a few days off, finally some time to write!
Yesterday I was sitting here in my gaucho-outfit trying to cool down after 4 hours of celebrating the start of our Karneval season with the kids in school. I'll have off until Wednesday, such a bless! I haven't decided yet if I will maybe throw myself into the mad crowds one of those days, but I possibly won't. I used to love it as a child of course but these days I have lost touch, it seems so weird to me. 

The school inspection went fine, just made me slightly angry. Five grown-up school inspectors, wearing suits and a face that probably didn't have a good laugh in the last 25 years, they watched a rather good lesson. Most of the kids behaved, just one was shouting out "Mom! I'm hungry!" all the time. The new boy. I still don't have an opinion about him. (Which is probably better for him.) It was just so much work - and in the end they tried to tell us that we should, for example, give every kid the homework it needs. Individualization. Sure, that would be the perfect state, and I agree that one has to think utopically in order to change something. But how to realize all these fantastic ideas when politics just shorten money and therefore good people where ever they can? 

That day is just too nice to worry or complain about work. It's almost 5pm and the sun is still shining brightly, though standing a bit deeper already. Perfect light  to take photos. On Tuesday I'm going to take photos of a girl I don't know yet. She just wants some sexy photos as a gift for her boyfriend. I will take her to that fabulous location where the girls&guns photos have been taken. It's very cliché - a sexy (probably slightly gothic) girl photographed in a stealwork ruin. But hey, I'm sure this is exactly what she wants. The photos of me with the gun have been created in a very spontaneous way: Moz the painter would like to paint me again, this time for an exhibition he is preparing now on that theme "girls and guns". How can I say no to such an offer? 

I've updated my website with lots of tour dates of bands who come to Cologne. I'd really like to see many of them, but I will have to make a few compromises, I can't allow myself to be tired for work too often anymore. Billy Bragg plays on the same day as Franz Ferdinand, but the venue where FF play is quite horrible. And I get in to see BB for free, I hope. The Veils are on my list. I still haven't decided if I want to go and see Belle & Sebastian or Tiger Army - difficult decision. I might make it dependant on who will be my company on that night...  Maybe we're going to see Edson, that labrador-band plays in a small café and one ofmy favorite German bands, Busch, will play an acoustic set before them. I have missed Adam Green and Death Cab for Cutie, 2 acts I really really wanted to see. Adam Green was totally my fault - I got the tour date wrong from another page and found out too late, oh well. DCFC played on the night my mother in law turned 60, the same night we went to that 50th wedding anniversary. I really like those old people but... it was simply too long. I put a Kleenex into my ears since the hammond/drum-combination really HURT. Nobody asked me to dance though - there were some 18 year old girls who had to do that job. For a moment it almost hurt. But I take it as one advantage being a thirtysomething.  

Maybe tonight, for sure tomorrow we will go out to yet another gothic/electro-night. I still love to dress that way from time to time, and I still love to dance to the music there but I mainly go there because our friends do.  There are not many places that have a dancefloor which is bigger than just a few square meters, you know? 

Oh yes... Since I'm a fulltime-teacher and work for the government, so to speak, I have a private health insurance. It's such a difference that it is almost funny. I never have to wait at the Doctors anymore, I get a very detailed description of what is done etc. Seems I'm in my menopause already. My hormones go crazy. I'm slightly worried of course especially since I never wanted to take any hormones again, never in my life. The pill just always made me feel depressed. I've changed my mind... I just hope I will feel ok.

But for now... Go out into the sunshine!
xxx