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Sunday August 24, 08
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09:41 PM - bitchy me
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the person who told me the story of my roommate decided to go hunt for her correct name as i could not remember it.
I knew her first name, of course, but if i knew her last name, it was mentally replaced by the last name of somebody else who has a very similar first name. After all, nobody really needed last names in that environment. Not when there are 23 people..
tonight she wrote back, "I looked it up. her name is (Jane Smith)."
Feeling my oats, I said, "her new name is Homewrecker."
yes, by god, that was cattier than a contestant on Project Runway. but here i was, beating myself up for being a bad roommate for not trying to be more friendly with her and thus putting a damper on my Spain experience...but i think the fact that she does that shit just hits the nail on the head about what kind of person she is.
yes, i do see the bad in people much more than i see the good, but i think there has been more than one time where I seriously misjudge how BAD some people can be. the guy in the WLA is a chief example. Maybe it's my own limited dealing with people, or the fact that I've been erroneously led to believe that Oprah has cured all neurotic behavior just by pointing out that it's stupid to stalk and hit people and so forth. But there are just times when, especially when pitted against my own faults, I'm way too willing to see the person as better than what they are and myself as being deserving of what they dish out. it's much easier to examine faults when its just the person by themselves or in comparison to a 3rd person. i tend to start blaming myself or inflating their opinion as being super-worthwhile when it's just me pitted against this person. to me, it at least makes sense because i need something to explain why i sit at home a lot, and it seems too contrived to say that everything is everybody else's fault. i know a lot of it's my fault that i do, but i'm so socially inept that i can't tell you what the reason is.
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