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11:29 AM
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try walking in my shoes.... you'll stumble in my footsteps..
I decided to go to a podiatrist..... there's nothing really wrong with my feet, let's just say, any girl, well, any girl with large feet, can tell you that they get very easily maimed and mutilated from years of wearing "cute" shoes, and by "cute" I mean pointy or high heeled or thin-bottomed or a combination of all three...
combined with the fact that panty-hose are, and have been, completely out of style for so long now, one has bare feet jammed into all manner of uncomfortable but "sexy" shoe.....
I don't really wear impractical shoes much anymore, but the damage has been done.... on the second toe of my left foot, I have developed a callous..... it's right on top of my toe.... it's not huge, nor is it very noticeable, but nevertheless, it's there... and I can see it... and I hate it. The reason it's there is that my left foot is slightly larger than my right and on top of that, the second toe of my left foot is a bit longer than my big toe..... so therefore, when I wear shoes that fit, the left foot has always been a smidge tighter and then my gangly toe ended up a bit bent.... this caused it to rub against the top of the shoe and thus, caused the callous.
After being embarrassed by this callous for quite a while, I decided to make an appointment at a podiatrist to see if he could get rid of it.....
how could I have known the horror to come?
Since I hate feet in general, I always wonder what would possess someone to complete YEARS of schooling to do nothing but handle people's nasty feet all day...... but whatever....
he did an x-ray of my feet.... he told me my weight was not being evenly distributed so he was going to make me a custom insole..... so far so good..... my arches aren't great so an insole would probably be beneficial, especially with all the walking I do (probably about 25 miles a week)....
and then he gets to the callous..... he explained to me what I already knew about the toe getting squished, rubbing against the top of the shoe, etc.
His brilliant solution?
and I quote, "The best way for this not to occur again is for us to SHORTEN the toe....." and he continued, despite the color draining out of my face.... "We put you under an IV sedation, it's very pleasant and relaxing, and we go in and shorten the bone of the toe.... it takes about 20 minutes and you'll probably have no down time...."
HUH??
"The sedation is a twilight sedation, so you're not completely under, but we like to relax the patient because we use a lot of saws and other tools that are kind of scary...."
seriously, HUH?????
So basically, you want me to saw off a piece of my toe to avoid getting a callous? um..... yeah, no thanks.....
how about instead of sawing off my toe, I just go out and get some BIGGER SHOES..... I think that sounds like a much better idea.....
wow.... I then got all kinds of mental images of my franken-toe post-op..... little stitches holding the whole thing on..... *shudder* imagine stubbing it after something like this...... eeewwww......
I told him he might as well shorten all my toes..... then at least then I could get into a smaller size altogether and a whole new world of cute shoes would await.....
it's going to be really hard finding shoes in the next half size up.... anytime they list shoe sizes, they go 8, 8.5, 9, 9.5, 10 and 11. what the hell happened to 10.5???
i'm already hovering right around the transvestite section in the shoestore as it is..... should I ever desire a nice 5 inch heeled clear plastic glitter shoe, I've got many to choose from..... it's the plain loafers that are going to be difficult....
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Bigger shoes is probably the go then, I wear size 10, but probably should be 10.5 or 11....so my feet are horrible to look at. I've also passed on the 'bad sized feet' gene to my children!
They both have huge foot size and one foot bigger than the other, so I only buy them sensible Clarks shoes.