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Saturday August 26, 06
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04:23 PM - Anec- dote
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There is a picture of you know who on my lounge wall and a French friend (no, not that one unfortunately) commented, "Oh, who went to the Robbie Williams concert?" which I thought was rather interesting in an archival and totally banal sort of way...
In other news I'm wondering how much the USA- UK alliance can further this threat- first Afghanistan, then Iraq, now Iran...? How far are they prepared to go? All the way it seems. Thanks god for propaganda- at least it keeps us more concerned about our I-pods than genocide.
Also, Hot Chip are marvellous...
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Friday June 16, 06
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08:48 AM - Ode to Bobmozza
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I just read Tales journal and I am shocked that is why Bobmozza doen't post on here any more.
Some people are scum.
If you read this Bobmozza I wish you all the best and hope whatever Nonce squealed on you gets ebola.
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Sunday March 26, 06
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10:48 AM - (This is required)
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Monday February 27, 06
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03:32 PM - Flip me over Matron
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Happy pancake day!
Yummy Pancakes
Ingredients (use vegan versions):
2 cups flour
1tablespoon baking soda
1tablespoon vegan sugar
1 egg substitute
cinnamon
1tablespoon lemon juice, or to taste
lemon zest (optional)
splash of vanilla
1-2 cups vegan soymilk (vanilla flavoured is great)
banana's, or apples sliced (optional)
Directions:
Combine dry ingredients, beat egg substitute into soy milk, and slowly add it to the dry stuff, don't overly stir, lumps are a good thing. add the lemon juice and the zest.
Heat a non-stick pan and add some oil, or vegan margarine. spoon the batter, and sprinkle with some cinnamon. When the batter has set a bit, places slices of the fruit onto it. Be careful when you flip the pancakes, so the fruit pieces don't fly everywhere, and cook it alittle bit longer on the fruit side.
When golden brown, take them off the heat, and eat them with jam, or fruit syrup, regular maple syrup is good too.
Makes 8 pancakes.
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Sunday February 19, 06
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11:37 PM - Ooh Betty!
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I've been dreaming about Morrissey again! I think I may also have been dreaming about the Osbournes...
Where will it all end?
The regurgitation of celebrity related ephemera in my dreams is surely a sign my brain is in need of... something. Don't worry, I've put the Fall on the stereo and ordered a copy of Heiddegger's complete works.
Beware sneezing ducks! Avian flu does not sleep!
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Tuesday February 07, 06
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01:30 PM - sing along!
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MY OLD MAN'S A DUSTMAN
(Buchanan / Donegan / Thorne)
Lonnie Donegan - 1960
Now here's a little story
To tell it is a must
About an unsung hero
That moves away your dust.
Some people make a fortune,
Others earn a mint;
My old man don't earn much:
In fact he's flippin' skint.
Oh, my old man's a dustman,
He wears a dustman's hat,
He wears cor-blimey trousers
And he lives in a council flat.
He looks a proper nana
In his great big hobnail boots,
He's got such a job to pull them up
That he calls 'em daisy roots.
Some folks give tips at Christmas,
And some of them forget,
So when he picks their bins up
He spills some on the step.
Now one old man got nasty
And to the council wrote,
Next time my old man went round there
He punched him up the throat.
Oh my old man's a dustman,
He wears a dustman's hat,
He wears cor-blimey trousers
And he lives in a council flat.
Lonnie: I say, I say, Les.
Les: Yes?
Lonnie: I, er, I found a police dog in my dustbin.
Les: Well how do you do know he's a police dog?
Lonnie: He had a policeman with him.
Though my old man's a dustman,
He's got an 'eart of gold,
He got married recently
Though he's eighty-six years old.
We said "'Ere, hang on, Dad,
You're getting past your prime";
He said "Well, when you get to my age
It helps to pass the time."
Oi! My old man's a dustman,
He wears a dustman's hat,
He wears cor-blimey trousers
And he lives in a council flat.
Lonnie: I say, I say, I say!
Les: Huh?
Lonnie: My dustbin's full of lilies.
Les: Well throw 'em away then!
Lonnie: I can't: Lily's wearing them.
Now one day whilst in a hurry,
He missed a lady's bin:
He hadn't gone but a few yards
When she chased after him.
"What game do you think you're playing?"
She cried right from the 'eart,
"You've missed me, am I too late?"
"No, jump up on the cart!"
Oi! My old man's a dustman,
He wears a dustman's hat,
He wears cor-blimey trousers
And he lives in a council flat.
Lonnie: I say, I say, I say!
Les: Not you again!
Lonnie: My dustbin's absolutely full with toadstools.
Les: How do you know it's full?
Lonnie: 'Cos there's not mushroom inside.
He found a tiger's head one day
Nailed to a piece of wood
The tiger looked like miserable,
But I suppose he should.
Just then from out a window
A voice began to wail,
It said "Oi! Where's me tiger's head?"
"Four foot from his tail."
Oh my old man's a dustman,
He wears a dustman's hat,
He wears cor-blimey trousers
And he lives in a council flat.
Next time you see a dustman
Looking all pale and sad,
Don't kick him in the dustbin:
It might be my old dad.
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Sunday January 08, 06
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05:46 AM - Wonder List
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A a small tribute to the everyday things that make my life better or just please me with their ability I give you: The Great Things List
Pea soup
tea towels
adhesive tape
bed
scarves
birds
dogs
trees
grass
pencils
books
music
avocadoes
baths
scones
tissues
chewing gum
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Wednesday December 21, 05
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03:17 AM - Right, that's it
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Ho ho ho and all that. Me and the four legged wonder are off to mumsy's to drink sherry and come to despise the general public.
Woof woof, see you all next year.
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Wednesday December 14, 05
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04:21 AM - Sleep the clock around
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I think I'm a workaholic. I constantly find myself in situations where I've made myself so busy my gums are bleeding and when i finally hit a deadline I have to lie down for a fortnight. This is probably not a good thing.
More importantly though I am dog sitting for my chum and the lovely brown eyed bitch is currently chewing my pyjamas behind me. This morning we froliced in the park and tonight we shall fall in to each other's paws...
Last night I stole a Jilly Cooper book. Only because I thought it would be funny though. And it was.
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Thursday November 03, 05
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04:44 AM - Thous Shalt Not Covet Thy Neighbour's Guide Dog
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If I was registered blind I could get a guide dog too. One with soft brown eyes and infinite patience. A free one probably. And maybe I could pull off walking around with a stick but I'd never pass the medical. Even if I did, they'd probably take Fluffy away when I made a sudden and remarkable recovery.
I have too much love and not enough garden.
Maybe I could tack a bit of fur on to flatmate's leg and rub it when she walked past?
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