The Awesome Pun Thread

CrystalGeezer

My secret's my enzyme.
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(Tom Brady is the QB for the Patriots who are playing the Colts today. He will break a record today for playoff appearances. I'm rooting for the Colts because that comeback last week was jaw-dropping. Gotta love a comeback kid.)
 
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Have you seen the well-to-do, up and down Park Avenue
On that famous thoroughfare, with their noses in the air
High hats and Arrowed collars, white spats and lots of dollars
Spending every dime, for a wonderful time
If you're blue and you don't know where to go to
Why don't you go where fashion sits,

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Awesome? Still not sure about the dog's balls one. Still not sure a dog doesn't need all the balls he can get.

How about this sign on golf courses?
"Gentlemen! Can't see your balls? Let your caddie locate them."
or on football pitches:
"You don't need more than one ball to play here!"

Now how awesome would *that* be? Besides appropriate.
 
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Me and my brother were driving past a local Chinese takeaway/delivery place called Wok On Wheels a few years ago.

"Have you ever had anything from there?" he asked.

"Yeah, a couple of times."

"Woks it like?"

"Wheely good."

We nearly crashed the car laughing. You probably had to be there.
 
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