The f*** My Life Thread

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found out yesterday, what the hold up has been on "Z visa" :confused:
seems the Chinese government wanted to see a scan of my discharge papers from the Army :straightface:
even though that was 20 years ago! :eek:
its a miracle but I still actually have it, now they do too, so hopefully this show can get back on the road :guitar:
I really hate it here in this "high desert hell" and just want out of here :cool:
fml :mad:
 
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so much to do in the next 23 days :eek:
but I think the worst of it is over now, these last 8 years have been hard, very hard :straightface:
feel happy about the future though
so FML, for now
then it begins anew come May! :guitar:
 
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WTF!

So a month or so ago one of the tenants had a grease fire in their kitchen, and the insurance decided to gut the kitchen and living room to repair the damage. They had to move into a motel, big drama. So their next door neighbor, in a DICK MOVE says to me, "Hey Amie, what are you gonna do about my dirty carpet?" I said we weren't responsible for cleaning the carpet, just for having it clean when they move in. Then a few minutes later I'm walking past and he says "Hey Amie. So how come they have a fire and get all new kitchen and carpet and you won't clean my carpet?" and he has candles all lit all over the livingroom, like it;s a threat that he;s going to burn down his apartment to get new carpet. What a little f***er. I told him NOT NOW and mentioned their rent got raised and he blew out the candles, still?

My greys are acting up. :D And randomly my friend with the billboard baby has decided to come visit like on the busiest day ever.
 
I had a dream I was hanging out with Morrissey and Boz BOSSSSSSSS drinking beers and chatting and a bomb was dropped far away and we were watching it like fireworks. :tears: This was in the middle of the night last night, I woke up at 3am. and looked out the window looking for explosion it felt so real. :(

I thought it might be about North Korea.
 
Big shocker, my friend who I have maybe exchanged 20 words with in the last two months has texted me tonight and suggested we should hang out starting June 21, 22, 23. :straightface:
 
I'm watering the plants, just done, wrapping up my spendy hose that I attach to the apartment complex hose THAT WORKS FINE. I've got a list of errands to run and a ton of stuff to accomplish and am on a roll when out of #10 comes Sherry. "While you have the hose out..." (it was unravelled maybe 5 feet) can we unkink some of the kinks in it? I said the hose worked fine and she insisted she sat in a seminar and you're not supposed to have kinks in your hose when the sun hits it. LONG STORY SHORT after knives and pliers and cutting boards and a milk crate and tapping my watch in my brain my day now consists of buying a hose caddy because of some kinks that weren;t even causing a problem. :rolleyes: Maybe they were causing a problem in a parallel universe and we're solving a huge problem. Normally I don't give a flip about distractions and hurdles but lately they irritate the f*** out of me. Yesterday at dinner with a friend I almost lost my mind sitting there waiting for my food while she talked with her mouth open and the waitress wouldn't bring my beer. I started my entree 30 minutes after her food was served, it's like our waitress was mentally retarded but I knew it was probably "great" because in another parallel place my drink wasn't served yet or some damn thing, but I wanted to leave so bad and just be in bed after a crytastic day, not losing my mind internally at an olive garden. Lol. :p
 
Also I just got a message asking me to help a lady "tape my big balls." She wants me to press record on her VCR because she wants to tape the show Wipe Out, but she calls it her big balls. Lol.
 
My friend keeps asking me to go see Steve Martin at the Hollywood Bowl. What she doesn't know is that if I were Steve's waitress, I'd spit in his food. If I saw him face to face, I'd tell him to go f*** himself in the ass. If I could heckle his spirited set, I'd ask if he got a golden house sitter for the evening, or better yet, a golden baby sitter. If I were just a tad more crazy than I am now I d figure out a way to shoot him not with a camera. But because my friend would be with me and she got a baby sitter for the night, I wouldn't want to ruin the evening. So instead I'd clap. Enjoy my $52 Mr. Martin, I'm sure you need it more than I do at the end of the day. FML
 
I'm on the last day of call-in Jury Duty hoping not to be called in. I have to go clean today instead of tomorrow in case I get picked. I'd rather spend the day on the couch in marathon mode, but the dirty toilets need me. :p
 
Minding my own business reminiscing about meeting Morrissey (be still my heart :love: ) when Marie in #3 comes knocking, it's an emergency, come help. Apparently I'm good at technology and making connections :)squiffy:) can I help her plug her TV into her cable. Okay? "Oh and someone is on the phone from India can you talk to them, we can't see that well our eyes aren't fresh like yours." So we determine the television is broken and isn't turning on. THen she hands me a diagram and wants me to study it to try something else. I say I'm not a television technician. Oh can you just wait, Gilbert is going to call the cable guy, talk to the cable guy. I say no, I don't want to be standing there connecting their television. Then she says how frustrated she is and I say I understand but I've got stuff to do. Then she starts giving me a list of other things wrong, fix this, fix that, this is broken...it was manic weirdness. I had to stop from saying, "You realize we're asking $400 more dollars for apartments the same size as yours, right? I wouldn't be bitching about how it's inconvenient to have to walk 3 feet to turn off a light switch that everyone else has that's been there since day one. Yeah, let's all stop everything and rewire Marie's house." But plunk in the middle of remembering that day.

Another thing about that day...that bride started making Morrissey feel guilty that he was ruining HER big day because HE wouldn't make her look cool because she got Morrissey to sing karaoke at her wedding.

Ugh. I hate this stretch-out-on-the-analysts-couch-in-metaphor part. Wasting time.
 
Me to a neighbor: Hey.

Neighbor: Hi.

Me: How you doing?

Neighbor. Fine, you?

Me: Been better.

Neighbor: That's good.

:squiffy:
 
WTF, really fantastic to watch Cat Power's Glastonbury live online, but suddenly live stream disappeared. :(

Chan was really enjoying herself, no need to cut off like that.
 
WTF, really fantastic to watch Cat Power's Glastonbury live online, but suddenly live stream disappeared. :(

Chan was really enjoying herself, no need to cut off like that.

She's soooooooo good live. That hasn't historically been the case but she got real sick and changed her diet and lifestyle and now she's amazing on stage, sorry live stream is failing you now.
 
Today is the last day of the festival, I understand they're shutting down the operation.

However, they could give us few minutes to appreciate.

They didn't remove link from Bobby Warmack, but Cat Power which is so annoying.
 
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