Worst has to be a tie between:
She said, "I know you and you cannot sing."
I said, "Of course I can you silly thing!"
England's a swine
And it owes me a living
He messed with two of my favorite lines there, but hey. They both sounded great actually, but the originals were perfect, IMO.
Best for me would be:
Can you tease me into an empty page of your diary
Psychologically shave me,
I have faith in you.
When he said, "I'm gonna screw you,"
I felt quite happy for you.
I've heard that you'll try anyone twice.