Uncleskinny For The Moment
Guest
Janice Long interview transcript
As I said below - thanks to the loon who has hijacked my name. Now back to business. Pick some clues from this lot then...
Morrissey – Interview from session on the Janice Long show, Radio 2, 9/12/04
Janice – “So, Steven Patrick Morrissey, and band, lovely to see you all, and welcome, thanks ever so much for doing this. In fact, the last time we were here, you had no deal, and life has just been one whirlwind since then.”
Morrissey – “It has been a whirlwind, yes, everything’s changed”
J – “Actually, not long after that I saw you in Birmingham and you were saying to me ‘I still haven’t got a deal, what’s going on?’, but this year you seem to have grabbed it and made it your own – have you enjoyed it?”
M – “I have enjoyed it for the most part”
J – “What do you mean ‘for the most part’?”
M – “Well, there’s always room for improvement – it’s never good to be perfect, is it?”
J – “I’ve never been perfect, have you?
M – “Oh now, Janice, you have”
J – “Oh, behave – but with everything, getting the deal with Sanctuary, who appear to be an absolutely fabulous label, so has it lived up, or once you get that, are you working your socks off?”
M – “Yes, it has really been fantastic, it really has, lots of fantastic things achieved, and I’m…reasonably happy”
J – “But there are these rumours that are circulating that started in San Francisco”
M – “We love rumours!”
J – “Well, we do, we like the gossip”
M – “What’s life without rumours?”
J – “You’ve got to tell us whether it’s true or not – that you are planning to retire”
M – “The rumour is more important than the truth, Janice.”
J – “So are you planning to retire?”
M – “I’m not saying anything, I’ve got Lockjaw”
J – “So why did you hint at that?”
M – “It’s nice to leave a paper-trail”
J – “But I would imagine that you’re not, because we’ve just heard a new song, and there’s another new song coming up, which means there’s going to be another album, Morrissey!”
M – “Well, maybe they could just be songs for this session Janice”
J – “Really?”
M – “Well, you just never know Janice”
J – “I was a bit disappointed because I thought you could have dressed up for me”
M – “I am dressed up”
J – “But I thought a priest’s outfit would have been nice”
M – “But I didn’t want to humble you – I see you dressed as a nun”
J – “No, this is me, always me, no effort, but – the priest’s outfit - it’s funny because someone e-mailed me, saying when they saw the video it put the fear of God into them, because it reminded them of education, and what had gone on, and thought a nun’s outfit would have been better, but didn’t want to go there”
M – “Really? You know some strange people don’t you?”
J – “This is a fan of yours – I don’t know him – so how are you coping with the whole thing that’s going on, the telly, because you’re doing things that I didn’t necessarily expect to see you on”
M – “I know – it’s peculiar – I’ve been in some very strange places that I never ever thought I’d be in – it’s very very odd, but I think somehow you feel you have a duty to be less invisible, especially if people are buying the songs you’ve placed out there – the compulsion to hide – you just have to get rid of it really. You have to do something, so consequently I find myself on certain TV shows and so forth, which I know you would never appear on.”
J – “I’ve never been asked – would you do ‘I’m A Celebrity?’”
M – “Oh, I just cannot wait – I’m rehearsing every night.”
J – “There are some people who are asked to do that all the time apparently, but you’ve never been approached?”
M – “I’ve never been approached in any way for anything.”
J – “Really? You’re lying!”
M – “I’m telling the truth”
J – “What about acting?”
M – “I don’t think you should do it.”
J – “That’s what I always wanted to be, an actress, but I’m asking you, would you act?”
M- “How can I act if I can’t even be normal...You don’t mean on Holby City?”
J – “No, I don’t mean on Holby City, but I could imagine you doing some art-house thing.”
M – “Really? Could you? Such as?”
J – “I don’t know – somebody would have to write it and then I’d see you in it and then I’d go ‘Yes – you should have done it.’”
M – “Do you know – I really don’t think I can act.”
J – “Have you ever had thoughts of doing it?”
M – “Occasionally, yes.”
J – “Is there something that you would appear in?”
M – “I’d just give Hamlet a go, I think, but otherwise – no, I’d like to be in a television commercial.”
J – “Would you? I couldn’t imagine that at all”
M – “No! JANICE!! Stop it! Stop it!”
J – “For John Smith’s Bitter!”
M – “Well, no I was thinking for Persil, really.”
J – “Oh yes, The Persil Challenge with Morrissey! What bands are you listening to at the moment?”
M – “Oh, just me. Just this band here.” (Laughter in the background)
J – “Liar.”
M – “No, it’s absolutely true – I think most people are dreadful, I really do.”
J – “No, there are certain bands that you like, I know.”
M – “Who?”
J – “Damien Dempsey, as a result, came on the show, The Dead 60’s we booked to appear as a result.”
M – “And you fell in love with Damien, didn’t you?”
J – “I think Damien is a great bloke, I really do and I think he’s very talented – what about you – because you always pick you supports, don’t you?”
M – “Pick them? Pick them to death, yes.”
J – “But you do select them, you do support new talent.”
M- “I select them, yes - It’s very important that the whole night is cohesive.”
J – “And Christmas – are you going back to L.A?”
M – “Mind your own business.”
J – “No, tell me.”
M – “Why should I tell you? Just ‘cos you have your own show, why should I tell you everything?”
J – “Because I’m asking”
M – “Oh well, that’s no reason.”
J – “You haven’t got anything planned?”
M – “Where are you going for Christmas?”
J – “Well, I did book two weeks off, well, I asked for two weeks and I didn’t think I’d get them, and I have, and we’re not going anywhere now.”
M – “You’re just going to stay in Brummie are you?”
J – “No – we’re going to drift around, see mates, and stuff.”
M – “So, are YOU happy?”
J – “Am I happy? Yes, I’m happy – I’ve got a good man, couple of kids that I love passionately, so yes, I’m very, very happy.”
M – “And they love you I hope?”
J – “I hope so, I think it’s reciprocated.”
M – “Have you asked them?”
J – “I will ask when I go home, but I think it’s all right. Right – we’ll wrap up now, but being vociferous, which you have been about America when you’ve been touring, and Bush, is there a problem with that?”
M – “With what?”
J – “Well, with the American Government”
M – “What – the fact that I don’t like him?”
J – “Yes – well is there ever the possibility that they would go ‘Well, all right, if you don’t like it, clear off, go back’?”
M – “Not really, because consequently there’d be nobody left in the country, because really nobody likes him – it’s really difficult to find anybody that likes him so you have to assume that the whole political thing is rigged, because everybody hates him. I mean, he is a danger to the world.”
J – “But 50-odd per-cent of the population voted for him.”
M – “Or so we’re told – I’ve never met those 50 odd people, so how do I know they exist? That’s my logic.”
J – “All right Mr. Morrissey thank you very much indeed, and have a very merry Christmas; I’m Playing Easy To Get – I thought that was gorgeous, it’s the first time I’ve heard it – absolutely beautiful, and Redondo Beach, the Patti Smith track – what are you going to do, what are the two tracks you’re going to do for us now?”
M – “The next one is called ‘Noise Is The Best Revenge’.”
J – “Which is another new one, so we are privileged – thank you very much indeed.”
