Getting Old: Discuss

[CrystalGeezer]

I think 40 is the age when "curmudgeon" officially sets in. I find myself getting outraged at the stupidest stuff. The other day I filed a complaint with the health department because a local grocery store had pallets of bottled water stored in front baking in the hot sun for days. Maybe some of those bottles were not BPA-free and were leaching toxins into the water that my fellow neighbors and consumers would buy and get breast cancer from. I wouldn't have done that at 38 or 39. Today I bought these Glue Dots at Wal Mart that promised to be 'Advanced Strength" that would hold up to 8 pounds. It couldn't hold a 5 ounce No Parking sign, much less "repair tile." Will I bother to return these worthless dots I paid $4 for? Probably not. Will I alert the Better Business Bureau to their false advertising and grandiose claims? You bet your sweet ass I will, because now I'm 40 and officially old.

 

[Anonymous]

I only know that every day I'm getting angrier and more intolerant, which is sad, cos if a had a chance to marry 5 years ago like all my classmates and university mates and made my mommy satisfied, now there's now chance to it. Haha. I'm not even 30, but thinking about my future is frightening.

 

[Anonymous]

happy belated birthday and yes you will get even more grumpy than that though you can actively fight against it

 

[Johnny Barleycorn]

I would never have guessed you were forty, CG. You look a lot younger. Mind you, I thought Playcat was in her early twenties, so take that as you wish.

I was going to start a slightly similar thread last week, but Christmas got in the way.

I go shopping for my elderly neighbour most days. Pint of milk, loaf of bread, just the odds and ends. A chat about the footy or politics. Nothing too strenuous. I've always tried to strike a balance between helping him out and him keeping his independence. He's 83, and has been getting very frail recently.

Anyway, I knocked on his door a couple of Monday's ago and there was no answer, but I don't actively check up on him. To cut a long story short a few hours later I felt something wasn't quite right and shouted through his letterbox and he shouted back he was fine, but again, I felt uneasy. After a lot of umming and ahhing I decided to have a look around the back, but the curtains were drawn. Another shout through the letterbox and again a response that he was OK. I told him I wanted him to come to the door and he didn't answer, and that was enough. I called the police and when they eventually turned up and gained entry it turned out he'd fallen over. Ambulance > hospital.

I went to visit him the next day and he was away with the fairies. He knew me, he knew names and most dates, but in some instances he was way off. He wasn't quite looking forward to Bing Crosby's next tour, but it wasn't far off. How much was medication, and how much was shock or something more serious and permanent is hard to tell. His family tell me he is a little more with it, but whether it will be enough for him to return to his home seems unlikely.

The reason I mention this is the geriatric ward was a startling experience for me. All my Grandparents shuffled off when I was a child, so he is the first person I've seen slowly deteriorate.

Anyway, the point is: f*** that. I'd rather jump off a bridge than this dying by inches. The worrying part is the geriatric ward must have been full of people who once thought that.

 

[Charlie Cheswick]

My Grandad died a couple of years ago in a terrible state, kept having one stroke after another, I wouldn't wish that on anyone. He was just too tough for his own good. My Granny just died over Christmas from the same thing and although we'll all miss her, I'm relieved that she didn't have to live an insufferable last few months.

40's definitely the age when I started having a lower tolerance for things I wouldn't be a fan of, I think as you get older you see through the bullshit more. At the same time though I'm more patient now with people around me, it'd take a hell of a lot to start a row with me, or just my Mother-in-Law.

 

[Anonymous]

I would never have guessed you were forty, CG. You look a lot younger. Mind you, I thought Playcat was in her early twenties, so take that as you wish.

I was going to start a slightly similar thread last week, but Christmas got in the way.

I go shopping for my elderly neighbour most days. Pint of milk, loaf of bread, just the odds and ends. A chat about the footy or politics. Nothing too strenuous. I've always tried to strike a balance between helping him out and him keeping his independence. He's 83, and has been getting very frail recently.

Anyway, I knocked on his door a couple of Monday's ago and there was no answer, but I don't actively check up on him. To cut a long story short a few hours later I felt something wasn't quite right and shouted through his letterbox and he shouted back he was fine, but again, I felt uneasy. After a lot of umming and ahhing I decided to have a look around the back, but the curtains were drawn. Another shout through the letterbox and again a response that he was OK. I told him I wanted him to come to the door and he didn't answer, and that was enough. I called the police and when they eventually turned up and gained entry it turned out he'd fallen over. Ambulance > hospital.

I went to visit him the next day and he was away with the fairies. He knew me, he knew names and most dates, but in some instances he was way off. He wasn't quite looking forward to Bing Crosby's next tour, but it wasn't far off. How much was medication, and how much was shock or something more serious and permanent is hard to tell. His family tell me he is a little more with it, but whether it will be enough for him to return to his home seems unlikely.

The reason I mention this is the geriatric ward was a startling experience for me. All my Grandparents shuffled off when I was a child, so he is the first person I've seen slowly deteriorate.

Anyway, the point is: f*** that. I'd rather jump off a bridge than this dying by inches. The worrying part is the geriatric ward must have been full of people who once thought that.

my great uncle was in assisted living apartments and they didnt even do half that and as a result he was on the floor for almost more than three days. didnt live long after we found him so good job there. ill be thirty five this year though i look like im still a baby in a lot of ways which brings its own frustrations

 

[mattisek]

I'm in my (early) 40s too. However I'd slighltly disagree. Turning 40 was not mayor step towards "getting old". It was more or less a process starting somewhere in the mid-30s and which still continues. You realise things like long nights and too much alcohol will give you a hard time the next morning. Which had no real effect on me in 20s. You start thinking the past was way much better etc. Well, me anyway.

On the other hand I also think I'm much more relaxed and patient on many things, whereas I'd argue a lot in my teen years and 20s. I think grey has become what was formaly known as all black or all white. And I now realise life is not endless with parents usually getting to an age which is obvious you won't spend another 20 years or so with them.

 

[123xyz]

I've found my ability to tolerate changes in the amount I eat has waned. I remember happily scoffing as much as I could , when a 20-something , at the local "All You Can Eat !!!" pizzeria when at lunch with friends. Now , as a 40 yr old , such a move would leave me ... ummm ... wondering if I have dysentery and imagining the neighbours' reaction to endless toilet flushing ...

 

[CrystalGeezer]

I would never have guessed you were forty, CG. You look a lot younger. Mind you, I thought Playcat was in her early twenties, so take that as you wish.

I was going to start a slightly similar thread last week, but Christmas got in the way.

I go shopping for my elderly neighbour most days. Pint of milk, loaf of bread, just the odds and ends. A chat about the footy or politics. Nothing too strenuous. I've always tried to strike a balance between helping him out and him keeping his independence. He's 83, and has been getting very frail recently.

Anyway, I knocked on his door a couple of Monday's ago and there was no answer, but I don't actively check up on him. To cut a long story short a few hours later I felt something wasn't quite right and shouted through his letterbox and he shouted back he was fine, but again, I felt uneasy. After a lot of umming and ahhing I decided to have a look around the back, but the curtains were drawn. Another shout through the letterbox and again a response that he was OK. I told him I wanted him to come to the door and he didn't answer, and that was enough. I called the police and when they eventually turned up and gained entry it turned out he'd fallen over. Ambulance > hospital.

I went to visit him the next day and he was away with the fairies. He knew me, he knew names and most dates, but in some instances he was way off. He wasn't quite looking forward to Bing Crosby's next tour, but it wasn't far off. How much was medication, and how much was shock or something more serious and permanent is hard to tell. His family tell me he is a little more with it, but whether it will be enough for him to return to his home seems unlikely.

The reason I mention this is the geriatric ward was a startling experience for me. All my Grandparents shuffled off when I was a child, so he is the first person I've seen slowly deteriorate.

Anyway, the point is: f*** that. I'd rather jump off a bridge than this dying by inches. The worrying part is the geriatric ward must have been full of people who once thought that.

Bless you for acting on your intuition! The oldest people I know are all quite stubborn.

Regarding what pretty much every other poster said I certainly hope those I love have a swift death. It seems the older ones also sort of "know." Like my grandma is giving all her stuff away with each visit. Last night I left with a gold scarf. The visit before a pair of earrings and a promise to be given the B china. (She has a monogrammed set of china with B's on them. Or I do now lol.)

I also find that while I'm curmudgeonly, I equally don't give a shit about certain things. If something breaks it's not a big deal because everything can be fixed.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

I think I've mentioned before that I work in a retirement community. Well, I'm sitting here at work just minutes ago and a resident came up to me and tooted so long and loud as she was talking to me, but the kicker: she didn't even hear/notice it.

When you're 89, you don't know you're tooting and you can't hear it as it's happening either. Imagine how much fun that is for the rest of us who can still hear.

Aging is awesome.

Thank you for working in a retirement community. Unsung hero. I regularly visited my Great Aunt in Rosemead before she passed and the aversion to rest homes by young people is astonishing to me. I vowed to concentrate my meditations (prayers) on Elder Abuse after witnessing the loneliness of people whose own family lived minutes away and only visited on Christmas for 30 minutes. Heart breaking. I have no children but I'm grooming my friend's children to not neglect me when I'm farting for a minute unaware fifty years from now.

 

[CrystalGeezer]

My Great Aunt Dot to bring this thread full circle. (Keep talking about getting old though!)

She was in four car accidents, used to ballroom dance every Saturday at the Palladium on Sunset with her husband Ludwig who kept in aviary in the backyard breeding finches and canaries, and had a Pomeranian named Bubbles. They were also very scandalous as far as the family was concerned because they were one of the first people to purchase a hot tub back in the 80s. My grandma thought hot tubs = orgies and sin. Uncle Wiggy just had achey bones.

 

[almareallymatters]

48 is the new 28!

Love Alma xxx

 

[Mozza220559]

I love old people, they're brilliant, untapped and open and honest. If I was at a bus stop I'd rather chat to an old person than a young whippersnapper or a 20 something.

I visit my nan a lot, she's 85, 86 next month and she still smokes, has 2 new hips and she's still independent and feisty. I love her, she tells me old stories about when she was a kid and when she used to be a market trader in the 60s on Brick Lane. Fascinating, her husband my grandad is a tough old bugger who's also 90 next month, he's living in a care home now as he has dementia and cancer so naturally my nan couldn't care for him 24/7, he's still going though and he's such an inspiration for me, he fought in WW2 as a gunner in The Royal Navy. If I get to his age and I've achieved half of what they both have as a married couple I'll die happy.

 

[modrevolve]

One thing I noticed at my age is I can't do the late night drive homes like I used to without getting sleepy eyes. At one point, I was practicing with a band in NYC twice a week, getting home around 3:30 in the morning and making it to work at a normal hour. Or at the dance clubs till 4am and getting home when my neighbors were getting up for church. Now even an arrival time of 1 in the morning is touch for me to handle.

 

[Anonymous]

I love old people, they're brilliant, untapped and open and honest. If I was at a bus stop I'd rather chat to an old person than a young whippersnapper or a 20 something.

I visit my nan a lot, she's 85, 86 next month and she still smokes, has 2 new hips and she's still independent and feisty. I love her, she tells me old stories about when she was a kid and when she used to be a market trader in the 60s on Brick Lane. Fascinating, her husband my grandad is a tough old bugger who's also 90 next month, he's living in a care home now as he has dementia and cancer so naturally my nan couldn't care for him 24/7, he's still going though and he's such an inspiration for me, he fought in WW2 as a gunner in The Royal Navy. If I get to his age and I've achieved half of what they both have as a married couple I'll die happy.

sound like some interesting people. people can surprise with the crazy stories they have sometimes

 

[Anonymous]

I am a 46 year old male and with age I lost interest in music. I do listen at times but at the same time find myself thinking it is something that people do to avoid working and that it is mostly people into drugs that work in music. I've also found that the body responds better to training now and that keeping fit is much more important. You do not have to let yourself go just because you get older but so many have given up and of course they have jobs and kids which prevents them from taking care of themselves.

Getting mad at things is part of growing up and you tend to take more responsibility on a whole. Caring about others health is a good reason to keep an eye on things that are wrong around you. I feel more relaxed now and I do not have to travel and do a lot and saying no is more creative than saying yes now. The more you run after things the further away from them you come.

I am in no way representable for the large majority out there as I do not work at all and so I can take care of myself and live the way I choose and not the way I have to. I can enjoy watching people with ambition hit their head into the walls as they compete with other like minded people about the sought after positions in our society.

 

[Anonymous]

I was never healthy but I really hit the wall in my late 40's. They found a progressive congenital heart condition and I'm a semi-invalid now. Don't put things off, folks. Travel, try things. You never know what's ahead. I felt great, til I didn't. You look at old people - their thick glasses, bad clothes, orthopedic shoes, and you laugh...until you learn that you will never be one. Carpe diem

 

[CrystalGeezer]

I love old people, they're brilliant, untapped and open and honest. If I was at a bus stop I'd rather chat to an old person than a young whippersnapper or a 20 something.

I visit my nan a lot, she's 85, 86 next month and she still smokes, has 2 new hips and she's still independent and feisty. I love her, she tells me old stories about when she was a kid and when she used to be a market trader in the 60s on Brick Lane. Fascinating, her husband my grandad is a tough old bugger who's also 90 next month, he's living in a care home now as he has dementia and cancer so naturally my nan couldn't care for him 24/7, he's still going though and he's such an inspiration for me, he fought in WW2 as a gunner in The Royal Navy. If I get to his age and I've achieved half of what they both have as a married couple I'll die happy.

My grandpa is 88. His central air conditioning went out this summer and he was on the roof fixing it. He found it a burdeon to have to climb all the way down the ladder to piss because he has to use a catheter when in the old days he'd just piss off the side of the roof, but it doesn't stop him. They're building a metro train line right behind his house, The Gold Line, and every day he badgered the workers and told them how they were doing it wrong and what they should do next. (My dad witnessed this and was embarrassed by it all.) He just won't quit, so not everyone winds down at 70, but a lot of people do. I see my mom winding down pretty fast, she's 72.

 

[Oh my god. it's Robby!]

I spend most of my time, not with kids, with adults a decade or more younger than me
and while it can tire me out sometimes, the truth is that it keeps me on a younger person's schedule
allows me to relate better to the world around me and gives me a certain satisfaction in being seen as someone, who some, see as having wisdom
so for me getting old is just really comes down to being more careful with my body/health
as a state of mind, it rarely exists for me, I am just too busy to let it do so

 

[Anonymous]

I spend most of my time, not with kids, with adults a decade or more younger than me
and while it can tire me out sometimes, the truth is that it keeps me on a younger person's schedule
allows me to relate better to the world around me and gives me a certain satisfaction in being seen as someone, who some, see as having wisdom
so for me getting old is just really comes down to being more careful with my body/health
as a state of mind, it rarely exists for me, I am just too busy to let it do so

do you mind if i ask how old you guys and gals are just for reference? im 34 myself