What's the standard protocol after a first date?

[alma matters]

Last night I went on a date with a pretty swell fella. It was a first date and a first time meeting.

It went pretty well, I believe ,and the evening was sealed with a kiss. He did act as if he wanted to see me again.

Now I need a bit of a refresher. I've been out of the dating scene for awhile.

Now what happens? I'd rather him contact me next. How long should I wait? I am insecure and hope he is not having second thoughts on a second date.

Dating is so stressful!

[Seasick]

Last night I went on a date with a pretty swell fella. It was a first date and a first time meeting.

It went pretty well, I believe ,and the evening was sealed with a kiss. He did act as if he wanted to see me again.

Now I need a bit of a refresher. I've been out of the dating scene for awhile.

Now what happens? I'd rather him contact me next. How long should I wait? I am insecure and hope he is not having second thoughts on a second date.

Dating is so stressful!

If you enjoyed, then send him a text and let him know that. If he wants to see you again, let him ask you out again.

Don't stress about it. Just keep it fun and light. If it is meant to be, it will happen. If not, there are plenty of others waiting in the wings.

[Disappointed]

Exactly what Seasick said. If you want, send him a short text or e-mail to the effect of, "Hi! I really enjoyed meeting you last night, and had a great time! Thank you!"

Then, wait for him to ask you out again. If the date went as well as you say, then it won't take too long.

[kyleleonard]

Did he text to see if you got home alright? (if he didn't personally drive you home) i normally do that after a date as i can't drive.

blokes aren't turned off by girls texting them first, btw, we're human, too.

If you want to arrange another date, just ask him, he might be as insecure as you are.

[Puppet on a string]

You shouldn't do anything.

Wait him out.

If you contact him before he contacts you, he will have the mental upper hand during the whole relationship/dating period.

That's what I say. I know many disagree.
I think I'm an absolute ultrarealist.

That's why I do not date.

[kyleleonard]

if a girl text me first after a date, never in my mind would i think i have the upper hand.

it depends on what sort of person you are, if you're a controlling one, etc...

[Moonbeam]

You shouldn't do anything.

Wait him out.

If you contact him before he contacts you, he will have the mental upper hand during the whole relationship/dating period.

That's what I say. I know many disagree.
I think I'm an absolute ultrarealist.

That's why I do not date.

Have you had bad experiences or something? You sound quite bitter.

[Puppet on a string]

if a girl text me first after a date, never in my mind would i think i have the upper hand.

it depends on what sort of person you are, if you're a controlling one, etc...

yes, you are right. It's easy to be decived by this. But it's certainly an indicator - for me.

You are very right also on the last note.
it's depends on who you are. And I'm very cynical. Too cynical to date.

So why am I even posting in this thread?

[Puppet on a string]

Have you had bad experiences or something? You sound quite bitter.

Many experiences, but nothing really bad.

Bitter? I don't feel bitter. just relieved to be out of the whole datingscene.

See other post

[Moonbeam]

Bitter? I don't feel bitter. just relieved to be out of the whole datingscene.

I like your way of thinking....

[Puppet on a string]

I like your way of thinking....

Your judgement is crazy.

But thank you anyway.

[j0wled]

If you want another date, let him know. If you don't, do likewise. Be upfront. By putting out on the next date.

[FlowSnakes]

Last night I went on a date with a pretty swell fella. It was a first date and a first time meeting.

It went pretty well, I believe ,and the evening was sealed with a kiss. He did act as if he wanted to see me again.

Now I need a bit of a refresher. I've been out of the dating scene for awhile.

Now what happens? I'd rather him contact me next. How long should I wait? I am insecure and hope he is not having second thoughts on a second date.

Dating is so stressful!

I do not have the slightest bit of advice, but simply after reading the question in the title I thought:

Obviously: Go home and try to find a way to laugh about the way you seriously explained to them: "It's me, not you... I'm sorry... but..." and then the whole thing about them crying and having to wait for one hour (in the rain) at the station to get home... You know, basically, just turn the tragedy into comedy and get on with life. Isn't that what everyone does after a "first date"?


Well, I shouldn't think...

[McLovin]

Two days is industry standard, but three days is money.

[troubleluvsme]

I do not have the slightest bit of advice, but simply after reading the question in the title I thought:

Obviously: Go home and try to find a way to laugh about the way you seriously explained to them: "It's me, not you... I'm sorry... but..." and then the whole thing about them crying and having to wait for one hour (in the rain) at the station to get home... You know, basically, just turn the tragedy into comedy and get on with life. Isn't that what everyone does after a "first date"?


Well, I shouldn't think...

That is so funny. It even brought a little tear to my eye!

Two days is industry standard, but three days is money.

[FlowSnakes]

That is so funny. It even brought a little tear to my eye!

Life... you know... *fake sigh*

[bored]

Exactly what Seasick said. If you want, send him a short text or e-mail to the effect of, "Hi! I really enjoyed meeting you last night, and had a great time! Thank you!"

Then, wait for him to ask you out again. If the date went as well as you say, then it won't take too long.

I agree with texting him but don't be boring or seeking a need for a date.

Have some fun with him.

Call him names or tell him you saw him robbing a petrol station while wearing a mini-skirt or tell him "I'm breaking up with you. You can have the kids and the Porche, I'm keeping the dog and the house in Australia"

if a girl text me first after a date, never in my mind would i think i have the upper hand.

Depends on the text.. "Hey, it was great going out the other night. We should go out again this week."

I think that would give the guy a lot of power. Maybe it doesn't for you, but more often than not, anyone who is not desperate would take that as a sign that they were in control.

The idea is to text them to be in their head.

"Hey, I've got a secret. Can I trust you?"

"Yes, of course you can"

"How do I know I can trust you?"

"Because I'm blah blah blah"

Now who has the upper hand?

He is trying to prove he is good enough to hear the secret (that camels have 3 eyelids on each eye or some other pointless piece of information). If he does get the secret, then it's his job to give one back and he has 24 hours.


Put a lot of space between responses. Make him wait.

[therightone]

I like your style bored......

[billybu69]

Ok come on alma it's been ages since first date what happened?

[nugz]

I agree with texting him but don't be boring or seeking a need for a date.

Have some fun with him.

Call him names or tell him you saw him robbing a petrol station while wearing a mini-skirt or tell him "I'm breaking up with you. You can have the kids and the Porche, I'm keeping the dog and the house in Australia"



Depends on the text.. "Hey, it was great going out the other night. We should go out again this week."

I think that would give the guy a lot of power. Maybe it doesn't for you, but more often than not, anyone who is not desperate would take that as a sign that they were in control.

The idea is to text them to be in their head.

"Hey, I've got a secret. Can I trust you?"

"Yes, of course you can"

"How do I know I can trust you?"

"Because I'm blah blah blah"

Now who has the upper hand?

He is trying to prove he is good enough to hear the secret (that camels have 3 eyelids on each eye or some other pointless piece of information). If he does get the secret, then it's his job to give one back and he has 24 hours.


Put a lot of space between responses. Make him wait.

ok bored i usually agree with your advice, but that just seems lame. nothing wrong with saying you had a fun time. if the guy thinks he has all this magical control just b/c you told him you had a nice time, he has mental problems.