Favorite Morrissey song to have sex to? (suggested by Dillon Barrousse)
Displaying poll results.
Hairdresser On Fire   4% 138 / 4%
Jack The Ripper   22% 769 / 22%
You're The One For Me Fatty   7% 269 / 7%
Last Of The Famous International Playboys   9% 313 / 9%
Disappointed   3% 104 / 3%
Little Man, What Now?   1% 62 / 1%
You Know I Couldn't Last   3% 131 / 3%
I'm Not Sorry   4% 162 / 4%
I Have Forgiven Jesus   3% 103 / 3%
Yes, I Am Blind   4% 142 / 4%
Interesting Drug   3% 125 / 3%
The More You Ignore Me, The Closer I Get   15% 531 / 15%
other   15% 520 / 15%
3369 total votes.

[ Voting Booth | Other Polls | Back Home ]

  • Don't complain about lack of options. You've got to pick a few when you do multiple choice. Those are the breaks.
  • Feel free to suggest poll ideas if you're feeling creative. I'd strongly suggest reading the past polls first.
  • This whole thing is wildly inaccurate. Rounding errors, ballot stuffers, dynamic IPs, firewalls. If you're using these numbers to do anything important, you're insane.

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Favorite Morrissey song to have sex to? (suggested by Dillon Barrousse) | Log in/Create an Account | Top | 199 comments | Search Discussion
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Songs to have sex to (Score:1)
well, give me serge gainsbourg instead any day.
but i believe 'late night, maudlin street' should have been in this pool

frenchybutchic -- Friday October 14 2005, @09:30AM (#181560)
(User #14444 Info)
You're The One For Me Fatty (Score:1)
of course...
Belligerent Ghoul * -- Friday October 14 2005, @09:31AM (#181561)
(User #9224 Info)
There is a light that never goes out...
    I'd Love To (Score:1)
    Followed by You've Had Her.
    Johan de Witt <johandewitt2@yahoo.com> -- Friday October 14 2005, @09:37AM (#181563)
    (User #4231 Info)
    lol this poll's hillarious (Score:1)
    esp. "you know i couldn't last"

    i don't think i could keep a straight face having sex to a morrissey song it would just be too weired
    xXx_Mrs_Moz_xXx -- Friday October 14 2005, @09:40AM (#181564)
    (User #14395 Info | http://www.camdram.net/shows/06/evening_with_gary_lineker )
    "The Earl of Sandwich invented the sandwich, Samuel Morse invented the Morse Code & Plato invented the plate"
    where is...? (Score:1)
    "i started something..."

    this is fun.
    suzanne * -- Friday October 14 2005, @09:50AM (#181567)
    (User #36 Info)
    I scare dead people.
    • Re:where is...? by xXx_Mrs_Moz_xXx (Score:1) Friday October 14 2005, @09:55AM
      Jack the Ripper? (Score:0)
      You do all know what this song is about don't you?

      Are you all repressed serial killers?
      Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @09:52AM (#181568)
      skin storm (Score:0)
      despite the fact he may not have penned it, "skin storm" is decicively the best nookie tune our moz has sung.
      Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @09:56AM (#181571)
      • Re:skin storm by Maude Lynn (Score:1) Sunday October 16 2005, @11:38AM
        more potentially amusing songs to screw to (Score:0)
        Glamorous Glue (it actually means cum)
        Seasick, and yet still docked (I've had that feeling before.. do I pull out and walk away?!)
        Best friend on the payload
        Wide to Receive
        (I'm) the end of the family line (an anthem for premature ejaculators?)
        There's a Place in Hell for me and my friends (a group sex anthem)
        November Spawned a Monster (did I remember to take the pill?)
        I don't Mind if You forget me
        Let the right one slip in

        Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @10:00AM (#181572)
        good poll (Score:1)
        "let the right one slip in"

        helps us paranoid types
        A Furtive Nudist -- Friday October 14 2005, @10:02AM (#181573)
        (User #13513 Info)
        The only difference between me and a crazy man is that i am not crazy
        • Re:good poll by Anonymous (Score:0) Friday October 14 2005, @11:07AM
          It has to be "You're the One for Me, Fatty"... (Score:0)
          ... from the list, although the person suggesting "You Know I Couldn't Last" made me laugh out loud. Nice one. :-)
          Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @10:03AM (#181574)
          retards r us (Score:0)
          who the hell is "Morrissay"?
          Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @10:10AM (#181576)
            nothing I like more than (Score:0)
            a romp in the hay to "I Don't Mind if you foget me"
            Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @10:11AM (#181577)
              Are you serious? (Score:0)
              Sex? Please. Barbarism, indeed.

              -W. Porter
              Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @10:22AM (#181578)
              Listen to Morrissey while having sex? (Score:1)
              urgh! what a revolting concept.
              comeback.special -- Friday October 14 2005, @10:30AM (#181581)
              (User #14744 Info)
                I jerk off to (Score:0)
                girlfriend in a coma and I won't share you
                moho -- Friday October 14 2005, @10:31AM (#181582)
                (User #10663 Info)
                Nookie in 2:45 seconds? (Score:1)
                Bah. That's not enough time. Where's the romance, people? Takes me that long just to light the candles, anoint myself with fragrant oil and set up the trapeze.

                If only a quickie, I guess "I Know Very Well How I Got My Name." The guitar-plucking lends itself well. However, for major long-playing lovin', er do I dare say "Vauxhall and I?" Well, yes, I guess I just did. Got my bells rung during "Quarry." That voice of his just does it for me.

                Hmm, Put me down as other.

                mozmic_dancer -- Friday October 14 2005, @10:46AM (#181584)
                (User #11277 Info)
                "I am the fun and the fair, on a Mozsite for the criminally insane..."
                I know it's already been said, but... (Score:1)
                it's got to be Skin Storm.
                English Martyr -- Friday October 14 2005, @10:59AM (#181588)
                (User #655 Info | http://website.lineone.net/~smilingontim/timstwin.htm )
                  Depends..... (Score:0)
                  If its sex.....definitely "Handsome Devil"

                  "And I would like to give you what I think your asking for"

                  If its making love....I would say "Late Night Maudlin"
                  Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @11:19AM (#181592)
                  lol @ little man what now? (Score:0)
                  that's hilarious.
                  leedoggpimp <leedoggpimp@hotmail.com> -- Friday October 14 2005, @11:23AM (#181593)
                  (User #2789 Info | http://www.morrisseymusic.com/ )
                  True friends stab you in the front.
                    Freak nasty (Score:1)
                    For those hardcore, sweaty, rough nights of insanity, "Jack the Ripper". Original version only, please.

                    Find me a creepier/sexier song in his catalog.
                    ATLpunk -- Friday October 14 2005, @11:47AM (#181598)
                    (User #13585 Info)
                    never had no one ever but (Score:0)
                    never had no sex ever :-(
                    Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @12:10PM (#181600)
                    "Reel Around the Fountain" Perchance? (Score:0)
                    If I can find said "fountain" of course.
                    Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @12:43PM (#181609)
                      Yes, Yes, Yes, Ohhh Yes!!!! (Score:1)
                      I'd agree with the previously mentioned Skin Storm and I Won't Share You. Let Me Kiss You is also good, but I do like Whatever Happens I Love You. Perfect bedroom material !!!!! But it's probably only good if your partner likes Moz too.
                      borntohang1968 -- Friday October 14 2005, @12:47PM (#181610)
                      (User #13232 Info)
                      older and wiser never applies to me
                      Such A Little Thing.... (Score:0)
                      ....it really does make a BIG difference.

                      You know the old joke....

                      I hooked up with some slut at a party - she took one look at my tiny knob and said..."who do you expect to please with THAT?!

                      and I said..."ME"!

                      -The Treading Lemming

                      Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @12:57PM (#181612)
                        Let The Right One Slip In.... (Score:1)
                        I can honestly say that "I have not had a good session with anybody while Morrissey's voice is gracing the room in the backround." I never really thought of his solo music or The Smiths to be romantic in any way. His lyrics are socially, politically and philosophically romantic but not sexually at all. I don't usually listen to Pop, Rock and Alternative when I am 'in the moment' or 'in the mood' or so to speak. If you are with the right partner and you are in the perfect situation, you never hear what is going on around you anyways! If if you are fortunate enough to be with the one that you could never have, the only music playing will be the songs that you are making. I love Morrissey's music more than any other, but the bedroom {or church} would most likely be the two places that I will never hear it!
                        Paneeks -- Friday October 14 2005, @01:27PM (#181618)
                        (User #13051 Info)
                        "A beach is a place where a man can feel, its the only soul in the world thats real".
                        Whatever happens I love you (Score:0)
                        And not cos of the slushy title but cos he sounds so damn sexy!
                        Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @01:41PM (#181621)
                          Alsation cousin (Score:0)
                          On the desk is where I want you... phwoargh
                          Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @01:43PM (#181622)
                            Girlfriend in a coma (Score:1)
                            sorry... just kidding...
                            Schmitzke -- Friday October 14 2005, @02:21PM (#181624)
                            (User #1209 Info)
                            Hello to Sabine Szlachciak, Stefanie Stamm and the "Unfab Three"
                              None of the above... (Score:1)
                              I don't think I've ever had sex or even masturbated to anything by Morrissey or the Smiths. Seriously, Morrissey or the Smiths do not make me horny, usually just sad and reminiscent. Things I'd rather not feel when I'm about to get lucky.
                              InterestingDruggie -- Friday October 14 2005, @02:41PM (#181632)
                              (User #9368 Info)
                                The answer is........ (Score:1)
                                My Love Life.
                                handsome devil -- Friday October 14 2005, @03:38PM (#181643)
                                (User #94 Info)
                                  And the ten worst would be... (Score:1)
                                  Suffer Little Children
                                  Meat is Murder
                                  Still Ill
                                  Nowhere fast
                                  Vicar in a tutu
                                  I started something I couldn't finish
                                  Angel Angel Down we go together
                                  The Operation
                                  Wide to receive
                                  Sorrow will come in the end (ouch!)
                                  Mmmmmm -- Friday October 14 2005, @03:53PM (#181644)
                                  (User #204 Info)
                                  Oh well, there goes the last nail in the coffin... (Score:0)
                                  ...of his reputation as the celibate, sexless, skinny, white english singer he once was.

                                  Who knew Morrissey's art really was just so damn...er...sexy??? Not the plethora of misquoting, misguided, quick-to-stereotype hacks out there that for years have painted our main man as the anti-Barry White in this department.

                                  And maybe even to his most rabid fans like us this side of Moz went largely underappreciated so to speak.

                                  So let's have some of his juiciest, sauciest, innuendo-laden lines repeated here and now please...who goes first?

                                  Anonymous -- Friday October 14 2005, @03:57PM (#181645)
                                  Not the first ~ and off topic ...and and (Score:0)
                                  New Song Titles :

                                  1- Cowards of the after hours
                                  2- Never gonna die (just my luck)
                                  3- Falling asleep at the wake
                                  4- Put that away!
                                  5- Makebelieve love
                                  6- The very unlonley libraian
                                  7- Smiling stalker
                                  8- Hopeless ~ but not poor
                                  9- Paige turner
                                  10-I know you are..but what am I?

                                  markmustb1 -- Friday October 14 2005, @04:44PM (#181649)
                                  (User #13161 Info)
                                  cos no one ever turns to me to say ...
                                  Worst poll idea ever (Score:1)
                                  I can't believe David T. actually approved of this poll.

                                  The juvenile comments are really awful. I am sure that Morrissey is cringe-ing right now.


                                  sycophantic_slag -- Friday October 14 2005, @08:14PM (#181660)
                                  (User #3940 Info)
                                  "And I just can't explain/ So I won't even try to."
                                  Im still a virgin (Score:1)
                                  so I didnt know what to put. I just put other.
                                  Is it wrong to be a virgin?
                                  Im 18.
                                  how about These things take time or never had no-one ever
                                  shane sarabia <c.sarabia52259@gmail.com> -- Friday October 14 2005, @11:14PM (#181663)
                                  (User #11459 Info)
                                  "My only mistake is i'm hoping"
                                  Sex (Score:1)
                                  It would have to be Miserable Lie for the sentiment. Muisc by the Smiths and Mozzer tho demands to be listened to. Not the sort of stuff you want to play during sex. Music as wallpaper is best during sex: anything with a repetitive drum beat basically. Moz is probably best saved for immediately after orgasm, when you're often filled with disgust and self-loathing. Or is that just me? Anyway, Carry On Morrissey...
                                  Listed Crime -- Saturday October 15 2005, @12:05AM (#181664)
                                  (User #13801 Info)
                                    Whatever Happens, I Love You (Score:1)
                                    OH Yes, Yes, Yes, OH YES!
                                    sacketsharbor <sacketsharbor@hotmail.com> -- Saturday October 15 2005, @12:22AM (#181665)
                                    (User #2739 Info)
                                    If you must go to work tomorrow, well if I were you I wouldn't bother.
                                      great sex lines (Score:0)
                                      Don't talk to me now
                                      about people who have sex
                                      Cause I have spent my whole life
                                      in ruins
                                      Because of people who have sex


                                      Erection is one thing
                                      but erection for a fool is cruel

                                      Anonymous -- Saturday October 15 2005, @01:47AM (#181671)
                                        Wiiiiide open (Score:1)
                                        Hello darlings,

                                        Personally I think Wide to receive is my favourite - gentle and so packed with innuendo and yes, since there is a clear devision between screwing and making louuuuuve then my top three in both categories would be (in no order):

                                        The one-night stand soundtrack:
                                        Maladjusted (just to hear him say "low cut blouse")
                                        Boy racer (but obviously this isn't a performance rating)
                                        Alsatian Cousin (for the growliness in the vocals and the lyrics)

                                        Barry-White nights in:

                                        Come back to Camden (!I'll be good!" Will you really?!?!?!)
                                        All the lazy dykes (For it's languid, Los Angeles suitry drawling .... thing)
                                        Let me kiss you (oh, go on then)

                                        Wow - all off the latest offering - I surprise even myself

                                        Colette -- Saturday October 15 2005, @03:24AM (#181676)
                                        (User #13384 Info)
                                        Pleasure for beautiful bodies. Pain for beautiful souls.
                                          Depends if I'm having sex alone or with someone... (Score:0)
                                          If I'm alone, then its "Yes I am Blind".

                                          When I'm with someone, its "Let the right one slip in".

                                          All joking aside, the BEST sex album is Portishead's "Dummy" album.
                                          Anonymous -- Saturday October 15 2005, @05:30AM (#181686)
                                          • Re:Lambchop by Anonymous (Score:0) Saturday October 15 2005, @05:39AM
                                            • Really? by Anonymous (Score:0) Tuesday October 18 2005, @01:09AM
                                            Discusting. (Score:0)
                                            I could never ever have sex to a Morrissey song, that's just horrible.
                                            Anonymous -- Saturday October 15 2005, @08:36AM (#181692)
                                            • Re:Discusting. by Hello Indie (Score:1) Saturday October 15 2005, @09:06AM
                                              dont you know? (Score:0)
                                              we Morrissey fans dont have sex... it's a written rule.
                                              Anonymous -- Saturday October 15 2005, @11:31AM (#181703)
                                              Glamorous Glue (Score:0)
                                              It is so ironic that this poll is taking place because I lost my virginity at the age of 18 and while this was happening, my boyfriend was playing the new Morrissey album at the time, which was "Your Arsenal". I could hear Glamorous Glue playing in the background during the ordeal.
                                              Anonymous -- Saturday October 15 2005, @11:36AM (#181704)
                                              i can't believe .. (Score:0)
                                              ..no one has mentioned 'there is a light..'!

                                              I've had some amazing times with that playing.

                                              Anonymous -- Saturday October 15 2005, @12:13PM (#181707)
                                              'Certain People I Know' (Score:1)
                                              has a good rhythm, plus the 'woah woah woah woah' ending of Moz doing his Elvis impression, which ties in nicely with the appropriate noises... but from the list, it'd probably be 'Jack The Ripper', for the passionate, lust filled cries of 'I want you' and the sense of pure physical delight mixed in amongst the wicked desires of Saucy Jack.
                                              But I try not to play any of my favourite artists or songs during The Act, as then the music is inextricably tied to that person and that moment, and should they break your heart or give you a bad experience, it would forever ruin the song.
                                              I do like to have a laugh in bed though, so I suspect something from The Smiths back catalogue would suit sex better; probably Some Girls Are Bigger Than Others, as the reference to Carry On Cleo cracks me up ... Oooh I say.
                                              Mozzersgirl -- Saturday October 15 2005, @12:17PM (#181708)
                                              (User #14229 Info)
                                              "There's more evil in the charts than in an al-Qaeda suggestion box" - Bill Bailey
                                                kill uncle (Score:0)
                                                Driving your girlfriend home
                                                Anonymous -- Saturday October 15 2005, @12:46PM (#181713)
                                                • Re:kill uncle by Hello Indie (Score:1) Saturday October 15 2005, @01:06PM
                                                  He Cried (Score:1)
                                                  The hills of Morrissey-solo though are certainly not ‘full of celibate cries’! After all, as that song observed, ‘people are still having sex’!

                                                  “She took away your troubles
                                                  Oh, but then again
                                                  She left pain.”

                                                  Yes, the worst and the best of times...the musical “Some Girls are Bigger than Others” conveys the potentials for ambivalence well.

                                                  goinghome -- Saturday October 15 2005, @03:36PM (#181725)
                                                  (User #12673 Info)
                                                    a monster (Score:1)
                                                    Why not "November spawned a monster". I was quite drunk that night!

                                                    scotty -- Saturday October 15 2005, @04:45PM (#181730)
                                                    (User #8242 Info)
                                                      Jack the Ripper on Who Put the M (Score:1)
                                                      I would have chosen "How Soon is Now" but there wasn't this option so I had to come up with "Jack the Ripper". The way he 'clasps his fists'in "Who Put the M", and the way he stretches his arms in the opening of the song...is very powerfully erotic complement for the song. He astounds me by the way he exhudes eroticism so naturally at this moment of the show, and during that playful second when he smiles looking up (for whom?), he's as casual about this volcanic sensuality, which is spitting out of this song as if he were merely watching a hummingbird kissing a flower...Very strange, compellingly strange, even more so for the fact that this song seems to have been made specially (by Boz) for Moz.
                                                      Mrs. Woolf -- Saturday October 15 2005, @05:22PM (#181733)
                                                      (User #14157 Info)
                                                      Delight , see our face are both shining... (Score:0)
                                                      "Skin Storm" is so romantic, soooo passionate, i think it should' ve in this poll in the first place...
                                                      pretty petty thief <dissapointed@excite.com> -- Saturday October 15 2005, @08:57PM (#181738)
                                                      (User #7529 Info)
                                                      hell is the bell that will not ring again....
                                                        "But you don't refuse" (Score:1)
                                                        Jack the Ripper (with "Last of the International" a close second for the ego boostin' title)...

                                                        Yeah "Jack" is about the intensity of a killer stalling his prey....well lust and sex are pleasures closely related to the intensity of murder, thus MOZ wrote this song to show how close those of us that actually have the ability to feel are to those that are of those that take it one step further from lust and envy to "romantic killing"....I think that's what I mean?
                                                        defari -- Sunday October 16 2005, @06:59AM (#181747)
                                                        (User #10050 Info)
                                                        southpaw (Score:1)
                                                        because of the beautiful melody
                                                        WhyteGrrrl <WhyteGrrrl@gmail.com> -- Sunday October 16 2005, @09:08AM (#181760)
                                                        (User #13540 Info | http://www.alainmatters.com/ )
                                                        No One Can Hold A Candle To You
                                                          First of the gang to flop? (Score:1)
                                                          Surely a little a bit of lyrical alteration can be effective
                                                          heatrowguy -- Sunday October 16 2005, @11:34AM (#181772)
                                                          (User #14520 Info)
                                                            'november spawned a monster' (Score:1)
                                                            i'm just odd, that's all.

                                                            'you know i couldn't last' would be all well and such, as it is a climaxing song, but the title doesn't have good implications, er, yes?
                                                            foolish_idealist <celibatecries1972@yahoo.com> -- Sunday October 16 2005, @03:31PM (#181784)
                                                            (User #12385 Info | http://www.livejournal.com/users/depressed_disco )
                                                            by friday, life has killed me... everyday is like friday
                                                              You're the one for me fatty....... (Score:0)
                                                              I'm sure someone mentioned this one. I'll leave my name off because if my wife finds out I posted this then I'll be the quarry.
                                                              Anonymous -- Sunday October 16 2005, @04:06PM (#181785)
                                                                Picadilly Palare (Score:0)
                                                                I get really aroused when I think of a muscular man dressed in a red babydoll and a blong wig. Morrissey would look ultimately sexy singing Picadilly Palare and wearing those. I think then is when'd chase him around like a Jack the Ripper.
                                                                Anonymous -- Sunday October 16 2005, @05:26PM (#181787)
                                                                  Listening to Morrissey... (Score:1)
                                                                  IS having sex. His voice is so seductive now, having sex while he's singing would be superfluous. Good thing my husband is a Moz fan, or I might have some explaining to do.
                                                                  Anaesthesine -- Sunday October 16 2005, @06:22PM (#181792)
                                                                  (User #14203 Info)
                                                                  If Moz did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.
                                                                    Never had no one ever... (Score:0)
                                                                    but if I ever do, I'll be lucky to hold out for the length of "Shakespear's Sister"
                                                                    Anonymous -- Sunday October 16 2005, @07:10PM (#181795)
                                                                      song (Score:0)
                                                                      I will never marry
                                                                      Anonymous -- Sunday October 16 2005, @08:16PM (#181798)
                                                                      • Re:song by Hello Indie (Score:1) Monday October 17 2005, @03:11AM
                                                                        Lost! (Score:0)
                                                                        I like to listen to meat is murder. From the fore play of The headmaster ritual to the closing off - mmmmmm actually i dont make it past Nowhare fast, But I normaly fuck on any way. Im single now cos I gave my heart to a girl who dissapered to university. But the last two girls i slept with both tasted it to the sounds of morrissey/smiths. Well if they cant take Mozz they couldnt take me. Introduce them to my true love!
                                                                        Dont matter now cos im empty, lost and lonley and unable to think of other girls since she went from my life. I would very much like to see her again.

                                                                        MC Jay Clevedon
                                                                        Anonymous -- Monday October 17 2005, @03:23AM (#181809)
                                                                          not just 1 song (Score:0)
                                                                          I start off with Louder Than Bombs, followed by Me Early Burglary Years,if we're still going at it, then Best of volumes I and II.

                                                                          The others are all just far too short.

                                                                          The Long Haired Lover
                                                                          Anonymous -- Monday October 17 2005, @06:00AM (#181820)
                                                                            Morrissey-solo confidential (Score:1)
                                                                            I absolutely never have sex. The last virgin of 21 years-old


                                                                            Please, help me. I´ll send you a photo if you tell me how ugly are I.
                                                                            FERREIRO <{nomebusques} {at} {hotmail.com}> -- Monday October 17 2005, @08:59AM (#181826)
                                                                            (User #7331 Info)
                                                                            I don't know quite what I mean...but.... (Score:0)
                                                                            Irish sperm, English eggs
                                                                            This I'm made of
                                                                            There is no one on earth
                                                                            I'm afraid of
                                                                            And no, drag queen
                                                                            Can pluck or suck me

                                                                            I've been screaming for a time when
                                                                            To be English is not to be labelled
                                                                            To be bending by the flag receiving Anal
                                                                            Painless or Painful

                                                                            I've been dreaming of a time when
                                                                            The English are sick to death of gay bars, and whoring
                                                                            And spit upon the name of Ms. Dame Edna

                                                                            Anonymous -- Monday October 17 2005, @10:28AM (#181837)
                                                                            uh... (Score:1)
                                                                            these song selections are for the birds. i would have put in some of these:

                                                                              -How Soon is Now
                                                                              -Last Night I Dreamt
                                                                              -I Know it's Gonna Happen Someday
                                                                              -November Spawned a Monster
                                                                              -Whatever Happens, I Love you
                                                                            organicsamurai <spw321@yahoo.com> -- Monday October 17 2005, @11:29AM (#181843)
                                                                            (User #10089 Info)
                                                                            . . .and if I ever wanted to cry, then I will because I can.
                                                                            • Re: uh... by xXx_Mrs_Moz_xXx (Score:1) Monday October 17 2005, @11:35AM
                                                                              • Re: uh... by organicsamurai (Score:1) Wednesday October 19 2005, @03:12PM
                                                                              The Real Dirt on Hector (Score:0)
                                                                              You have never been in love
                                                                              Until you're seeing stars
                                                                              In a stall at the gay bar

                                                                              And you have never been in love
                                                                              Til' you seen semen blown
                                                                              Out of a fat human bone

                                                                              We are the preening, partly gay
                                                                              And you're riding on my meat
                                                                              Like Hector who was the ...

                                                                              First of the Gang with a dick in his hand
                                                                              And the first to suck cock, the First of the Gang to Fuck

                                                                              Such a fruity boy

                                                                              Hector was the...

                                                                              First of the Gang with a cock in his palm
                                                                              And a Penis in his Anus, and the first lost lad lapping a load

                                                                              (And he slept with the Rich and the poor, and this fat scary bitch and this hairy whore)

                                                                              Anonymous -- Monday October 17 2005, @11:38AM (#181846)
                                                                                Witty? (Score:1)
                                                                                Weel i don't know but isn't it quite tongue-in-cheek to add "you know i couldn't last" to the poll? What does the title imply in this subject?
                                                                                Mozhead_GBG -- Monday October 17 2005, @01:45PM (#181877)
                                                                                (User #14822 Info)
                                                                                  How could you forget Suedehead ... (Score:0)
                                                                                  with the line "How do you come here when you know you make things HARD for me....
                                                                                  Anonymous -- Monday October 17 2005, @02:36PM (#181885)
                                                                                    this is sad but... (Score:1)
                                                                                    i have not had sex since March 23, 2001. i wouldn't normally tell strangers, but i figure here i'm just a faceless name in the crowd. i'm not sure what the problem is, i'm not too choosy, and i'm not ugly. I know that you would like me if only you could see me, if only you could meet me.
                                                                                    texansdoitbetter -- Monday October 17 2005, @03:07PM (#181892)
                                                                                    (User #14449 Info)
                                                                                    Bump and Grind to Strangeways? (Score:1)
                                                                                    This is an odd poll. I could understand the question in regards to Bowie or Depeche Mode or The Doors but it seems like The Smiths and Morrissey transcend sex. While many songs have homoerotic/erotic tinges they are less about the flesh and more about the mind. I consider myself quite the musical slut and yet I almost would feel sacreligious doing it to the strains of Moz. Sex is important but the music of The Smiths seems to address the intricacies of the entire human experience more so than one aspect, sex. Again, I question why my poll topic suggestion was disallowed : "What is the best homoerotically toned Smiths song"....it would be interesting and laregely debatable but I guess the powers that be are homophobic or whatever. Let's face it loves, Morrissey intentionally imbues his lyrics with an ambigious, often-times homoerotic sexuality. The rejection of my poll topic reminds me of several of the idiots who populate songmeanings.net, constantly insisting that Morrissey's sosngs have no gay subtext. It's like, let's go back to High School Senior English people and learn to read between the lines!
                                                                                    DavidBeauy <davidbeauy@yahoo.com> -- Monday October 17 2005, @03:09PM (#181893)
                                                                                    (User #6009 Info | http://beaurock.net/ )
                                                                                    "When thirteen years old Who dyed his hair gold ? Oh, I know very well, I don't need to be told"
                                                                                    Alone or with someone? (Score:1)
                                                                                    Alone: Wide to Receive (because you can just close your eyes and see Morrissey laying there ready and wide to receive almost anything you'd care to leave.)

                                                                                    Together: Suedehead. because its a good lay.
                                                                                    artful dodger * -- Monday October 17 2005, @08:00PM (#181949)
                                                                                    (User #13974 Info | http://www.myspace.com/wallieworld )
                                                                                    and as for me, I stand with the tribe of Morrissey.
                                                                                      Quite a coincident. (Score:1)
                                                                                      Actually, i had sex to The Smiths last week.

                                                                                      Ithought i was a great idea, BUT, it was quite uncomfortable, like someones whatching.

                                                                                      Someone whos tried it? Someone whos felt the same?
                                                                                      Ante -- Tuesday October 18 2005, @01:23AM (#181970)
                                                                                      (User #9583 Info)
                                                                                      It wasn't Youth, it wasn't Life. Born Old, sadly wise.
                                                                                      Jack The Ripper (Score:0)
                                                                                      Anonymous -- Tuesday October 18 2005, @05:57AM (#182011)
                                                                                        celibacy (Score:0)
                                                                                        should we be having sex in the first place?!!!

                                                                                        i haven't had it since 13 when i discovered The Smiths. Don't tell me he's changed his mind?!! DAMN all those wasted years.

                                                                                        Mine would be Boy Racer in that case!!!
                                                                                        Anonymous -- Tuesday October 18 2005, @06:18AM (#182016)
                                                                                          anyone care to............... (Score:0)
                                                                                          Feel Around my Mountain...?
                                                                                          Anonymous -- Tuesday October 18 2005, @06:43AM (#182024)
                                                                                          how exciting (Score:1)
                                                                                          A poll that doesn't ask which song to cry to, die to or sit alone with.........

                                                                                          I'd go at it with jack the Ripper, but first, I'd say that there would have to be a little disrobing to "Disappointed".

                                                                                          Because, well, how do you pick just one?

                                                                                          MozGirl18 -- Tuesday October 18 2005, @12:31PM (#182067)
                                                                                          (User #2483 Info)
                                                                                          "It is absurd to divide people into good or bad. People are either charming or tedious."-Oscar Wilde
                                                                                            Send Me The Pillow, The One That You.... (Score:1)
                                                                                            Does a Nocturnal Admission count?
                                                                                            Paneeks -- Tuesday October 18 2005, @01:32PM (#182082)
                                                                                            (User #13051 Info)
                                                                                            "A beach is a place where a man can feel, its the only soul in the world thats real".
                                                                                              also good to listen to while in a hot bath (Score:0)
                                                                                              a smiths tune..
                                                                                              'Stretch out and Wait'

                                                                                              i wish Moz would do more subtle, relaxing songs..
                                                                                              Anonymous -- Tuesday October 18 2005, @03:24PM (#182097)
                                                                                                I Must Say (Score:0)
                                                                                                that Quarry is perhaps the WORST CD to have sex to. I did when it came out. Somehow, making love whilst someone croons "Monday - Humilation" etc...Doesn't do it for me!

                                                                                                But I'd say Skin Storm or, even, Lifegaurd Sleeping...For those, y'know, gentler moments!

                                                                                                Jessica xx
                                                                                                Anonymous -- Tuesday October 18 2005, @04:53PM (#182117)
                                                                                                • Re:I Must Say by Anonymous (Score:0) Tuesday October 18 2005, @10:11PM
                                                                                                  Jack The Ripper!!!! (Score:1)
                                                                                                  DEFINITELY!!!! ... and TROUBLE LOVES ME!!!!

                                                                                                  M O Z Z E R A
                                                                                                  cot3_onthemix -- Tuesday October 18 2005, @06:17PM (#182127)
                                                                                                  (User #13529 Info | http://www.fotolog.com/stgocity_girl )
                                                                                                  "...oh please fulfill, otherwise kill me"
                                                                                                    Busy Clippers (Score:1)
                                                                                                    Ouch - Why would anyone want to choose Hairdresser on Fire?

                                                                                                    carnal artist -- Wednesday October 19 2005, @02:14AM (#182148)
                                                                                                    (User #7076 Info)
                                                                                                      I don't think I ever could (Score:1)
                                                                                                      I don’t think I ever could, not to any Morrissey song. I find it very difficult to concentrate on anything else when I’m listening to Morrissey or smiths songs.

                                                                                                      I find the lyrical content so powerful; that I almost have to stop what I’m doing and listen……. But if I was forced to them I’d go with the majority, Jack the ripper, but the live version from Beethoven was deaf.
                                                                                                      Tbevie -- Wednesday October 19 2005, @02:29AM (#182151)
                                                                                                      (User #14894 Info)
                                                                                                        depends (Score:0)
                                                                                                        on what sex I'm doing. When I'm taking it up my fadge I like to listen to suedehead, when I'm taking it up the rusty sheriff's badge I like to listen to The Operation.
                                                                                                        Anonymous -- Wednesday October 19 2005, @09:27AM (#182204)
                                                                                                        • Re:depends by Anonymous (Score:0) Wednesday October 19 2005, @10:14AM
                                                                                                          • Re:depends by Anonymous (Score:0) Friday October 21 2005, @02:10PM
                                                                                                            I will roar from the stalls... (Score:0)
                                                                                                            I will gurgle from the circle!
                                                                                                            Anonymous -- Wednesday October 19 2005, @12:35PM (#182232)
                                                                                                              Ever Notice...? (Score:0)
                                                                                                              Anyone else notice that THE CURE is Great(!) to have sex to ? Bloodflowers especially... Criticise if you will, but have sex while listening to Bloodflowers first and then tell me I'm wrong !!!

                                                                                                              -Man of Vision
                                                                                                              Anonymous -- Wednesday October 19 2005, @08:33PM (#182285)
                                                                                                              Big Mouth Strikes Again (Score:1)
                                                                                                              Big Mouth Strikes Again

                                                                                                              But only if you are really lucky ;)
                                                                                                              rik recked <rikrecked@ntlworld.com> -- Wednesday October 19 2005, @09:39PM (#182286)
                                                                                                              (User #8612 Info | http://homepage.ntlworld.com/rikrecked/ )
                                                                                                                Such A Little Thing Makes Such A Big Difference (Score:0)
                                                                                                                I'm surprised this wasn't on the poll. Where do they keep their brains?
                                                                                                                Anonymous -- Wednesday October 19 2005, @11:51PM (#182291)
                                                                                                                  Everyday Is Like Sunday (Score:0)
                                                                                                                  Come Armageddon Come!

                                                                                                                  Need I say more?
                                                                                                                  Anonymous -- Thursday October 20 2005, @08:21AM (#182326)
                                                                                                                  Handsome Devil (Score:0)
                                                                                                                  this certainly is the one...

                                                                                                                  'Let me get your hands on your mammary gland and let me get your head on a conjugal bed'

                                                                                                                  'I crack the whip and you skip'

                                                                                                                  'Who will swallow whom?'

                                                                                                                  'I would like to give you what I think you're asking for'

                                                                                                                  The rawness of the words and the music just screams sex.
                                                                                                                  Anonymous -- Friday October 21 2005, @05:54AM (#182424)
                                                                                                                  please let me stay in bed (Score:0)
                                                                                                                  you dont have sex to morrissey
                                                                                                                  you quiver under sheets with morrissey
                                                                                                                  not get laid
                                                                                                                  Anonymous -- Monday October 24 2005, @10:57AM (#182600)
                                                                                                                  • Re:none suitable by Shoplifter1983 (Score:1) Thursday November 03 2005, @02:29PM
                                                                                                                    would morrissey approve? (Score:1)
                                                                                                                    I indulged in a highly charged sexually affair that was conducted to the smiths and morrissey albums. we wondered if he would approve of us having such a fantastic debauched time to his music. However,we are no longer together and I cant listen to Come Back To Camden without crying - that will teach me to enjoy myself. I have been punished. Its back to endless repeats of LNIDSLM and no more signing I Like you at the top of my voice
                                                                                                                    bona -- Wednesday December 21 2005, @12:28PM (#189703)
                                                                                                                    (User #15142 Info)

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