Sorry guys. I'll be in Mexico this weekend. Wish I could have gone:(

Much better than that sorry ass Maldonado.

Come to LA peoples!

Mexican Morrissey INDEED!

1 Freeyourself ruined the only Morrissey album I enjoyed listening to from beginning to finish, from the laid back sun-kissed sound of California on "America is not the World" to the high camp self-pity of "you know I couldn't last." "But how?" I hear you ask. By naming himself after the lyric towards the end of "All The Lazy Dykes" - that's how. Every time I get towards the end of one of my favourite songs on the album I hear those warm, loving words "free yourself, be yourself" and I see some hideous pile of lard covered in pubic hairs, reclining on a dirty floor surrounded by kylie records with "hot and "cum" emblazoned on his grotesque face, pulling some revolting "homoerotic" pout. It's a little like pre-emptive nausea when you're on the way to the hospital for chemotherapy. Even the *thought* of those words towards the end of the song makes me nauseated these days. I often reach for the track skip function as late as I can bear to, without risking having to hear those words.

2 Freeyourself has the personality of a vicious poisonous old queen, who spends all his time bitching and looking at porn.

3 Freeyourself is apparently dating a man "with form." I think you know what I mean.

4 Freeyourself is obese and smells like moth balls, yet he acts like he's some sexy young superstud. Yucky.

5 FYFS is into the "bear scene" - this means he likes to dress up like a gimp and meet other fat, ugly men for halitosis-ridden kisses, and fungal foot play.

6 Have you seen that pic of him on the floor with "hot and "cum" on his face? Hahahahaha

7 FYS is a vile racist who uses terms like "chink" and also happens to be a bit of a pervert. A disgusting combination, frankly. The contents of his typing probably reflect the contents of his mind. Not a pleasant thought.

8 FYS sits on his fat arse typing messages to himself and registering IDs on this forum for 20 hours a day. This probably means (i) he has a personality disorder or (ii) he is an insomniac with no life, friends, family or job or money.

9 FYS was reported to be "a bit pongy" after the earls court show - apparently after moshing, his bum started to smell a bit of damp, warm shit.

10 FYS is a fat cunt. Did I mention that?

11 Freeyourself has an eating disorder^

12 Freeyourself stinks of shit.

13 He burdens the man we love.

14 He beats his elderly mother up when he visits her. (Despite the fact she should be beaten for spawning such a monster).

15 He cowers away from those whom he trolls.

16 He looks repulsive in his cheap suits. (He looks repulsive anyway)

17 He shit his pants at G-MEX.

18 He abuses animals.(He microwaved a cat)

19 He lies and eats meat.

20 He is 'Freeyourself', nothing could be worse and thats a fact.