Is a poser, a loser and is absolutely without question not cool

or smelled him for that matter!

While some smiths fans are stylish and unassuming, some of them are little more than fat old oafs!

At least twice as cool as most of you and that makes me at least four times as cool as everyone in Noel's record shop. Too cool for school.

Not only is buying records from a record store just for the thrill of it, not cool, it's idiotic.

I have experienced more music from finding it online than I ever could, or have from trying to wrangle it from a record store. This has translated into following the tour dates of more bands, where more of my money makes it into their pocket. IMO, records are nothing more than promotional tools for live live events.

His comments sound like a music industry public service announcement that is meant to try and get kids off of the dangerous influence of internet downloading.

I could even imagine him pointing his finger emphatically toward the camera as he recited these lines. "Cool kids by records form record shops!" No, casual music fans who don't know how work a microwave buy cd's from cd shops, and at an ungodly price.

Although, I like his sense of humor.

Unfortunately, there is little that is cool about the majority of Morrissey fans. They're weak, would turn away form a fight in a second, and usually have emotional issues that will render them impotent for a good portion of their lives. They essentially never grow up, and having morrissey constantly telling them that it's okay to not grow up, will make the event even mroe unlikely. After the age of 16, there is absolutely nothing cool, or interesting about that. Some of them don't even have a sexuality, which is nowhere near being cool.

Yes, I said it. Now go cry yourself to sleep because nobody loves you. I'm going to get laid.

Having been a Smiths fan since '83, I can totally relate to Noel. You would walk-up to the record store cash register and slap down your copy of "The Smiths" and the record store employee would give you this nod of acceptance. I think music started dying when vinyl left. There was something so personal and..physical about a record. It wasn't just..."Oh, track 3 is really good". You knew which side contained which songs..you carefully read the lyrics, the credits, etc.. And, there was nothing like the feeling of finding a rare 12" ....sometimes in the bargain bin (Mine was a 12" of The SMiths with Sandi Shaw....99 cents Canadian).

I buy absolutely every album/single I want on vinyl. If it isn't on vinyl I won't go near it. For that reason the ridiculous cd only release of Morrissey's last live album means I don't have it in my collection. If he releases his next album only on cd I won't be getting that either. I'll be crying about it but I absolutely refuse to buy cd's. They're a complete money making con.

Anyway, that is why I am the coolest. And to the idiot that reckons we're all lilly livered virgins, if he dares not to post with his name I'll track him down and give him a good hiding!

Dear God, with all of the talk about fitted cardigans, and nostalgic record shopping sprees, you would think that many of you were nothing more than a collection of shuddering EMO kids.

That's right, "EMO," the most pathetic type of music fan in existance. And yes, you are devoid of sexuality because sexuality does not exist in EMO music. Only a celebration of crying into your pillow exists in EMO music.

And don't for a second try to bow-up, and act as if you're one of those pub-trash, soccer (Sorry, that's how it's spelled second string America) hooligans that can only fight effectively in teams, and sometimes not even then.

I'm in the third column of Morrissey fans. I enjoy sex, books, and beatings. I see Morrissey as an artisitc genius who is nothing more than a half-educated manchild. However, most artists are. They're not meant to be liked, and don't think for a second that they give two shits about anyone but themselves.

Finally, to many of you disenchanted, female Morrissey fans, don't pretend to be put off by my agressive nature, for if we ever met, you would have no choice but to question your principles.

Afterall, isn't an attempt at purity, really just an attempt to stem desire?