Archduke Franz Ferdinand was first with the Cobra-bothering:

"Chris Patten, with a cuckoo's beak, breakfasting on a table attached to Norma Major's bouffant in Jean Marie Le Penn's snooker club. New Hawk City. The master of rubiks cube-goading and hopskotch was far from miserable as he jovially threw small clumps of pesto at Al Gore."

Its written weakly by Ted Cunterblast, I find it at the bottom of my toilet.

Here's the actual link Ted Roger's The Awfully coy carp.

Did anyone else first read this as "Morrissey spotted in NY on E!"?