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That's quite funny... I always thought Tony the Pony would make a great name for a children's TV show... Maybe Morrissey could narrate, I dunno. What? Stranger things have happened... The worst drummer in the beatles Ringo Starr narrating Thomas The Tank Engine for instance...
I can just see it now - "Tony the Pony had been Asleep and woke up to find This Charming Man sat next to him. Dressed in black, the nice man said that he had arrived in Tony's field to mourn the Death Of A Disco Dancer who had once lived where Tony now slept. Tony remembered the disco dancer as a bit of a loser... Tony had many a fight with the dancer and said 'I can laugh about it now, but at the time it was terrible'... 'Oh, heaven knows I'm miserable now'. The man sighed 'Yes, I know... that's not all The Queen Is Dead too...'. 'Oh, that witch' Tony muttered 'I didn't like her anyway, the daft cow. Oh, now I'm happy... I just might die with a smile on my face after all...'
Sorry, but it's the best I could do under the circumstances (Hangovers are the devil's work). My apologies.