"Prozac Destroys Morrissey's Career" spoof in "The IndieQUIRER"
posted by davidt on Saturday September 02 2000, @06:00AM

Axed writes: I stumbled upon this online zine called "The IndieQUIRER" (Aug. 2000):

"Prozac Destroys Morrissey's Career"
"Sources close to Morrissey say, the master of gloom, has been ruined by use of the anti-depressant drug Prozac. "He was at his most productive when he was melancholy and isolated. Now he is cheerful and has a new outlook on life. He has taken up kyaking and he has been toying with the idea of dating. Everyone is very concerned about is condition" said a friend.

"Morrissey says he wants to do happy songs now and he is not going to write any more about lonliness and heartbreak. He has been listening to the Beach Boys a lot and says he would like to do something more in that vein." another source told the Indiequirer.

Morrisey has been taking the anti-depressant drug since 1998 according to sources.

 
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    "Prozac Destroys Morrissey's Career" spoof in "The IndieQUIRER" | Log in/Create an Account | Top | 67 comments | Search Discussion
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    happiness is an option (Score:0)
    since when should people be worried that morrissey is happy now? good for him! isn't that what we should want? moz has suffered long enough..i hope he finds someone to live the rest of his life with now.
    Anonymous -- Saturday September 02 2000, @06:13AM (#1966)
    Ha ha ha bonk (Score:0)
    Good god, that's about as funny as a mining disaster.
    Anonymous -- Saturday September 02 2000, @07:21AM (#1967)
      Actually (Score:1)
      I think its supposed to be a joke
      David T (different) -- Saturday September 02 2000, @08:52AM (#1968)
      (User #256 Info)
      david_t[at]boltblue.com
        prozac survivor (Score:1)
        I know this is a joke, but around the time of Vauxhall and I, didn't Moz mention in an interview that he had tried Prozac and didn't like the effect it had on him?
        Bertrand -- Saturday September 02 2000, @09:14AM (#1969)
        (User #134 Info)
        Something more useful... (Score:1)
        Be more selective on all the un-news, which leaves us all yellow in the face.
        underneath me -- Saturday September 02 2000, @11:34AM (#1971)
        (User #1404 Info)
        pretty laughable (Score:1)
        ive had a bad day, what a funny little pickmeup. the very idea of morrissey listening to the beach boys...
        thinlizzie -- Saturday September 02 2000, @11:49AM (#1972)
        (User #1134 Info)
        Beach Life? (Score:1)
        Morrissey already did a song about Beach,Sun, Calf.-summer-etc...Remember "The Lazy Sunbathers!!!
        DannyDangerous -- Saturday September 02 2000, @12:59PM (#1975)
        (User #1158 Info)
        "It takes strength to be gentle & kind"
        This is funny! (Score:1)
        Funny article, I do not picture Morrissey listening to crap like the Beach Boys, even if he found "happiness".(sorry beach boy fans)

        Even if Moz started writing on "upbeat" subjects, you have to admit that his way of putting things will always be interesting and highly intellegent.

        mute001 <jason@onwarddesign.com> -- Saturday September 02 2000, @02:13PM (#1981)
        (User #1167 Info | http://www.onwarddesign.com/ )
        download, something, useful or useless...
        Oik, another silly caper. (Score:0)
        For one split second of my life, this article worried me. I'd swear my heart stopped till i read "spoof"
        Anonymous -- Saturday September 02 2000, @03:50PM (#1984)
          It's false, yet more truthful than the NME..... (Score:1)
          If only this was true - I'd like so see Moz really happy (it would be quite intresting!).....because he deserves it. Oh well, I think he's somewhat positive these days.....must be the American fans!
          Rediffusion -- Saturday September 02 2000, @06:33PM (#1988)
          (User #176 Info)
          What do we get for our trouble and pain? Whalley Range!
            shock ! (Score:1)
            i knew all the time something was different. people say to me that he is different now, and i could not see why. i am feeling very depressed... actually, i think i'm gonna cry. well, i'm really feeling strange and i am a little shocked. maybe you can not believe but i am really crying, and i know prozac can change a life. i deserve all the happiness to moz, but i think i could not stand if his words would change... i would feel desolate... alone. really, i am feeling horrible now. prozac is fine, but.....oh no, i can't say nothing more...... i'm really bad. god help me please...
            somnium -- Saturday September 02 2000, @09:05PM (#1994)
            (User #1086 Info)
              Don't disrespect the Beach Boys.... (Score:1)
              I know, I know--it was a joke. I actually did my share of chuckling. But did they really have to use the Beach Boys to make their point? The Beach Boys have only created some of the most gorgeous heart wrenching music in history. Witness, "Pet Sounds" or "Sunflower".

              I guess what I'm saying is that MOrrissey could actually gain something if he were really listening to the Beach Boys.

              Alas, the ignorant masses will know them only as the surf group that did "Fun, Fun, Fun"!!!!

              :)
              blurjose -- Saturday September 02 2000, @10:17PM (#1998)
              (User #533 Info)
              now, we know why mOz fans are called humorless (Score:1)
              couldn't people just tell from the article title alone that it was a joke?
              suzanne <{suzsch} {at} {sbcglobal.net}> -- Sunday September 03 2000, @01:41AM (#2000)
              (User #36 Info | http://www.myspace.com/snootywriter )
              I scare dead people.
              Moz on Proz (Score:1)
              Prozac/Zoloft etc. don't make you "happy" per se...they even things out, cut out the highs and lows associated with depression.

              Anyway, I *would* like to see him do a bright, happy album...why not? And the Beach Boys are NOT crap. Download Pet Sounds from Napster and see.

              jason
              xoxo
              king leer -- Sunday September 03 2000, @08:44AM (#2005)
              (User #80 Info)
              • Re:prozac/zoloft by somnium (Score:1) Sunday September 03 2000, @06:18PM
                • Re:Moz on Proz by sandra bracelet girl (Score:1) Tuesday September 05 2000, @02:37PM
                  • Re:Moz on Proz by Anonymous (Score:0) Tuesday September 05 2000, @03:32PM
                    • Re:you suck! by somnium (Score:1) Wednesday September 06 2000, @12:35AM
                  It must be a joke. (Score:0)
                  Kyaking and Moz?
                  It should be a great movie.
                  Anonymous -- Sunday September 03 2000, @09:45AM (#2008)
                    Heīs been stabbed in the back... so many times (Score:1)
                    After all the betrayls from so called friends I think that Morrissey is much to wise to tell secrets about his life to Judas-people who would be able to sell out his soul to the press or the net.
                    But if this rumours are true -I guess itīs time for Morrissey to get rid of some of his "friends".
                    strange_pills -- Sunday September 03 2000, @09:45AM (#2009)
                    (User #1428 Info)
                      Beach Boys/Johnny Marr (Score:0)
                      It's very amusing that the author chose to cite the Beach Boys ..... Johnny Marr is an admitted fan.
                      Anonymous -- Sunday September 03 2000, @11:34AM (#2015)
                        Morrissey on Provac (Score:1)
                        People crack me up. If you acually paid attention to that site, you notice the "DISCLAMER" at the bottom. lol. Heres what it says:

                        This little website of mine about indie rocker scandals is a joke. None of the stories are even remotely true. It's just for laughs and entertainment. If any of the bands I have poked fun at manage to see this site and are deeply offended I am willing to remove articles mentioning them. Hopefully they all have a good sense of humor.

                        There, can you breathe again?
                        PopQueen <grr@dork.com> -- Sunday September 03 2000, @02:53PM (#2017)
                        (User #1254 Info | http://hometown.aol.com/pinkrawkar/index.html )
                        --Holy Slut.
                          Good grief, Charlie Ground Round (Score:0)
                          Wasn't Charles Manson fond of the Beach Boys, too? or did he just write music with them? **shrug**
                          Anonymous -- Sunday September 03 2000, @05:20PM (#2018)
                          That joke isn't funny anymore (Score:1)
                          Moz on Prozac? Next I guess he will be at Walmart shopping for diapers...for himself! god this world is horrible...miserable.....Moz PLEASE come back to your senses --- IF you aren't there already.
                          mozarama -- Sunday September 03 2000, @05:28PM (#2022)
                          (User #127 Info)
                            What Difference Does It Make? (Score:0)
                            ... Destroyed? Ehehehe!!!
                            I see Morrissey in Oye Esteban's shows, better than never! Happy or sad, He is MORRISSEY, my friends...
                            " Why of the I smile at people who I'd much rather kick in the eye "?
                            Anonymous -- Sunday September 03 2000, @08:39PM (#2028)
                              Morrissey on Prosac! (Score:1)
                              In review on the posted article:

                              -Who are the sources?
                              -Who has directly spoken about the Morrissey prosac affair?

                              To the writer of this article.

                              -Where is your empirical references? Without them, this article is just simply part of the unethical and spontaneous tabloid industry.
                              -An industry that speaks it's imagination and not the ultimate and absolute truth.

                              On a brighter note... to the true fans:
                              -If Morrissey has been taking Prosac, shouldn't this be a good thing for him and for us. We could very well witness a new age. An age of happiness, glory and self-actualization.

                              In the past, we have been drawn to Morrissey on the basis of depression, subordination, reflection, exploitation, inner turmoil and regret. Now we can understand, witness, feel and hear material that is very special, beautiful and bright. Happiness in it's fullest form, from the very man who has touched us in the deepest possible way.

                              dasher -- Sunday September 03 2000, @09:50PM (#2032)
                              (User #585 Info)
                              Stopping Prozac responsible for Moz resurgance (Score:1)
                              I, too, was on prozac fro 4 or 5 yrs and didn't notice any difference other than the fact that I seemed to have no feelings, it was very easy to "let things roll of my back"; also I was called "the ice princess" on several occasions, but most of all, I stopped listening to MOZ and the smiths! Coincidence? I think not. Well anyhow, now that I'm off of it, my affinity for Moz has been rekindled... so naturally I can't help but wonder if I'll have to go back on it to enjoy his new stuff?
                              Anonymous -- Sunday September 03 2000, @10:08PM (#2034)
                                hello? (Score:1)
                                as pop queen said, the article is a joke. it says so itself. will everyone please quite talking about as if it were real? there are enough things to get worked up about in the world.
                                neal -- Sunday September 03 2000, @11:16PM (#2037)
                                (User #799 Info)
                                  Happy Moz? (Score:0)
                                  I think Moz likes the Beach Boys anyway. Why not?
                                  Heīs rather bizar figure who toys around with bizar ideas. But I donīt think that he ever gonna write a Beach Boyish song or something happy. He is to sad to do that.

                                  By the way, the rumour was a joke.
                                  Anonymous -- Monday September 04 2000, @04:44AM (#2040)
                                    About Prozac!!!!! (Score:1)
                                    Well,if Morrissey decides to write happy songs,he will certainly be able to join a band similar as "Take That" or something like "Wham".Because,when Morrissey write sad poems,he his speaking about us.About our lives,about how life is,in its true and real meaning.Morrisey happy?Sorry but that doesnīt make sense...Very nice ,very nice,but maybe in the next world!!!!And iīm writing this to say in a gentle way... thank you but...NO!

                                      Goodnight and thank you
                                    Moors Murderer -- Monday September 04 2000, @07:46AM (#2042)
                                    (User #1435 Info)
                                    prozac (Score:1)
                                    It's clear he started taking beta-versions of the drug in october 1984, because the William-12" was the last time I really believed he meant it.
                                    Anonymous -- Monday September 04 2000, @02:05PM (#2051)
                                      Prozac Moz (Score:0)
                                      Morrissey redoing the complete Friends-lp would be Prozac to me.
                                      Anonymous -- Monday September 04 2000, @02:23PM (#2052)
                                        At least Moz isn't Scientologist! (Score:0)
                                        this spoof article sounds a bit like some lame-ass Scientology or Christian Science hand-out! "See! See how mind-altering prescriptions can ruin lives!" Whatever, I'm sick of going to Hollywood and seing those asses making millions off of scaring people. No, I won't take your stupid free personality test, navy boy! Screw you L. Ron! Oh, and your stupid Battlefield Earth movie sucked Travolta!
                                        Anonymous -- Monday September 04 2000, @05:55PM (#2055)
                                          GleeMenex (Score:1, Funny)
                                          You simply must watch Kids in the Hall BrainCandy to see the devastating results when this does actually happen. This is the funniest item I've seen in a long time. Keep the stories coming from the tabloids. I don't even want to think about how many people would have believed it if it was a "Morrissey abducted by Space Aliens" story. People would have been crying.."but he still had one more good album in him! Why couldn't they have taken Johnny Marr instead!"
                                          Anonymous -- Tuesday September 05 2000, @10:25AM (#2074)
                                            Moz on Prozac? (Score:0)
                                            I think by definition, the name "IndieNQUIRER" would lead one to believe that, like the Supermarket tabloid of similar name, it is total bullshit. I mean, honestly, people...
                                            Anonymous -- Tuesday September 05 2000, @10:32AM (#2075)
                                              this one (Score:0)
                                              This all true , i heard his next single will be called," I wish they all could be California boys"
                                              Anonymous -- Tuesday September 05 2000, @11:44AM (#2078)
                                              Morissey=prozac (Score:1)
                                              However, due to his genetic makeup, he has sworn off of prozac and is none the worse for it.
                                              Calhobbs6 -- Tuesday September 05 2000, @08:01PM (#2094)
                                              (User #1445 Info)
                                                where can i get prozac? (Score:0)
                                                i think, iīll have a go too...
                                                Anonymous -- Wednesday September 06 2000, @06:08AM (#2103)
                                                  Prozac Destroys Morrissey (Score:0)
                                                  I'm a brazilian Morrissey's fan. I read some about that Morrissey and Prozac. I have depression and I take medicine, not the Prozac because it's much strong. I decided take medicine because I was tired. Like Morrissey said "Yes, I'm blind/ I can't see the good things, just the bad things..."
                                                  But I know that my decision was right. I don't want someone sad only this person to do excelent songs. Morrissey is special because he is singular. His life likes Greta Garbo's life. She died alone, but she wanted that. Everybody needs new experiences, new influences. "Nothing cures the soul, otherwise the senses - like there is not
                                                  to cure the senses nothing like the soul". "To influence someone is an exercise overpowering". Point to Prozac in that case.
                                                  I think that Morrissey will tired with Prozac, if he really takes it. He appreciates his image.
                                                  In my country there was a poet that said "but said me that the sadness 'dress' me so well".
                                                  Anonymous -- Monday September 11 2000, @05:04PM (#2253)
                                                    Morrissey VS shyness, which is nice.... (Score:1)
                                                    Hey.... THIS IS MORRISSEY HERE! Perhaps, yes, he wants to try new things, and I'm sure if he does write happy songs, they will still have the wonderful humor like in all his compositions. Seriously, just as long as prozac is what he wants, and is helping him, just as long as he doesn't do anything trastic.... LIKE KILL HIMSELF!!!!! :********O
                                                    Dusan -- Monday September 11 2000, @08:53PM (#2255)
                                                    (User #1224 Info)
                                                      What? (Score:1)
                                                      My dog tells better jokes.
                                                      sucre -- Tuesday September 12 2000, @09:06PM (#2295)
                                                      (User #1477 Info)
                                                        Come Again ?? (Score:1)
                                                        I'd really like to see that - Morrissey kyaking. Look, that whole little scoop of rubbish has sent my head spinning. Dear God - The Beach Boys? Heaven knows he must be miserable now...
                                                        hand in glove -- Thursday September 14 2000, @12:37AM (#2336)
                                                        (User #827 Info)
                                                        Art is the tree of life. Science is the tree of death. - William Blake


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