posted by davidt on Friday October 31 2008, @01:30AM
Link posted by Alma.Anima in the forums (original post):

Morrissey tour information; Years Of Refusal, Southpaw Grammar, Maladjusted, I'm Throwing My Arms Around Paris release details - true-to-you.net
30 October 2008

US dates will now precede the projected tours of New Zealand and Australia for 2009. Years of refusal now has a release date of February 23rd, which will also see the start of a lengthy US tour. New Zealand and Australia will now follow the US dates. BMG issue a redesigned and re-mastered Southpaw Grammar, and Universal issue a redesigned and re-mastered Maladjusted one week after Years of refusal.

The new album is preceded by I'm Throwing My Arms Around Paris as a single release. CD1 and CD2 will be supported by two new songs Because of my poor education and Shame is the name. Both songs were recorded with Jerry Finn as part of the refusal sessions, and Shame is the name features additional vocals by Chrissie Hynde.
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  • Oh well us Aussies will have to wait even longer now. I was looking forward to kicking off Moz's tour in my part of the world but I guess USA gets the best seats in the house most of the time.
    marred -- Friday October 31 2008, @01:37AM (#313595)
    (User #16308 Info)
  • I guess Europe/UK comes last. When d'you reckon that'll be? Summer? Festivals?
    Anonymous -- Friday October 31 2008, @02:37AM (#313599)
  • shit my pants!
    Anonymous -- Friday October 31 2008, @03:34AM (#313602)
  • the song sucksssssssss
    my ass
    Anonymous -- Friday October 31 2008, @04:49AM (#313607)
  • I'm glad Maladjusted is being remastered. And that the worst Morrissey artwork EVER will be laid to rest. What was Moz thinking back then?!!

    Hopefully there will be bonus tracks...and Sorrow Will Come in the End will resurface.

    Strutting Rooster -- Friday October 31 2008, @05:20AM (#313611)
    (User #15031 Info | http://www.facebook.com/struttingrooster)
  • not that i dont absolutely love Maladjusted but why are the record companies re-issuing the less popluar albums in his back catalog ? where's my Vauxhall and Arsenal remasters?
    MrTheEdge -- Friday October 31 2008, @05:42AM (#313614)
    (User #18333 Info | http://animalhumans.blogspot.com/)
  • if he can get paris hilton for the video, maybe it will be a hit? although I guess russell brand will be looking for work....
    mattorefice <[email protected]> -- Friday October 31 2008, @06:31AM (#313617)
    (User #2318 Info | http://pechogrande.com/)
    Leslie Towne Hope = Packy West
    • Re:video by Anonymous (Score:0) Friday October 31 2008, @06:33PM
  • I was wistfully hoping for a Moz/Hynde duet on another thread a few days ago, and lo and behold, it comes to pass.

    Two of my favorite singers FINALLY singing together.

    This is just awesome news. If she joins Moz live on stage, I will just melt with joy.

    '09 may be looking up after all, for many reasons.

     
    Anaesthesine -- Friday October 31 2008, @06:47AM (#313619)
    (User #14203 Info)
    If Moz did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.
  • Marquee Theatre, Tempe, AZ. Standing!
    Anonymous -- Friday October 31 2008, @07:22AM (#313622)
  • I am suprised at the news of a lengthy US tour followed by New Zealand then Australia.I cant imagine Years of Refusal will gain a high UK chart placing without a supporting tour on these shores.Also am I correct in thinking that ticket sales for last years US tour were less than spectacular?
    Paris is a strange choice for a single,I thought that would be a B side at best.
    Vince Taylor -- Friday October 31 2008, @07:35AM (#313625)
    (User #21250 Info)
    • Re:US Tour. by Anonymous (Score:0) Friday October 31 2008, @09:04AM
      • Re:US Tour. by Vince Taylor (Score:1) Friday October 31 2008, @09:20AM
      • Re:US Tour. by wemissumoz (Score:1) Friday October 31 2008, @10:57AM
        • Re:US Tour. by robiskeen (Score:0) Friday October 31 2008, @11:39AM
    • Re:US Tour. by Anonymous (Score:0) Friday October 31 2008, @09:58AM
    • Re:US Tour. by Anonymous (Score:0) Monday November 03 2008, @10:29AM
  • a well known opening track to start Years of Refusal

    I hope Jerry Finn will be honoured for his last work, in what way,I dont care, he desrves it,
    as a last goodbye, his last work

    Tourdates, great for ya lot in the USA, but I hope ticketsales will be better than last tour

    I think around his 50th birthday, the USA tour
    will be over, and can be celebrated in a great
    park or place in Manchester
    An all day festival, with bands and friends who
    he likes to play and come to celebrate

    but first, the album, 29 feb next year, I'm get
    exited allreeady to get that fresh new CD in hands, and click on play

    Celibate Cry <[email protected]> -- Friday October 31 2008, @07:41AM (#313626)
    (User #220 Info)
    and the hills are alive with celibate cries
    • ticket sales by Anonymous (Score:0) Friday October 31 2008, @08:50AM
    • Re:again by Anonymous (Score:0) Tuesday November 04 2008, @10:32AM
  • The title gives me the creeps..
    It sounds like a potential B-Side Hit....

    It's unbelievable.
    23th February in 2009... Actually one day later it's my birthday!!

    I can't wait.. ^^
    Anonymous -- Friday October 31 2008, @07:50AM (#313629)
  • 1) The use of the lower case in TTY post throws me. I'll assume that's just sloppiness. The album title is Years of Refusal not Years of refusal, correct? And is the B-side Shame is the Name or Shame is the name?

    2) I assume the TTY means that I'm Throwing My Arms Around Paris will be a promotional single released in advance of the album. But by the way it's worded, one could infer that ITMAAP is a stand-alone single that will simply precede the album chronologically.

    3) Why isn't Shame is the Name registered at Warner?

    4) Why haven't we heard about the re-release of Maladjusted until now?

    5) Who wants to bet this gets pushed back to March?
    DW -- Friday October 31 2008, @09:41AM (#313647)
    (User #21580 Info)
  • I love this title :)

    Since I lost 26 lbs so far, I think I can go jumping up the stage and trying, well, seconds of proposal :))
    Mrs. Woolf -- Friday October 31 2008, @10:10AM (#313649)
    (User #14157 Info)
  • No British dates? How rude!
    i'llsendyoumine -- Friday October 31 2008, @10:29AM (#313651)
    (User #20579 Info)
  • Not that again, I thought Moz was over raking up mistakes.

    You can put lipstick on a pig....it's still a pig!

    Glad for the tour though, time to start getting a suitcase put together, happy times are here again.
    Mr Sunshine -- Friday October 31 2008, @11:37AM (#313654)
    (User #21211 Info)
    I was a nice kid. With a nice paper round..........
  • Stupid vinyls!
    Anonymous -- Friday October 31 2008, @11:53AM (#313657)
  • Re-releasing Two old Crap albums!! Fuck me backwards! Is there nothing this guy won't do to milk every last penny he can from his remaining gullable 'must buy everything' fans. Morrissey you once stood for all that was right and good, it was you against the rest, but you've turned out to be the very worst of them all. GREEDY ROBBING BASTARD! I won't buy your new album even if it is as good as Vauxhall. No way!
    Anonymous -- Friday October 31 2008, @12:04PM (#313663)
    • Re:Greedy by Bozzer1 (Score:1) Friday October 31 2008, @12:08PM
      • Re:Greedy by Anonymous (Score:0) Friday October 31 2008, @12:11PM
        • Re:Greedy by Bozzer1 (Score:1) Friday October 31 2008, @12:38PM
        • Re:Greedy by marred (Score:1) Friday October 31 2008, @02:49PM
    • Re:Greedy by Anonymous (Score:0) Friday October 31 2008, @12:35PM
    • Re:Greedy by uncleskinny (Score:1) Friday October 31 2008, @12:48PM
  • Having read some posts surprised that hes not doing the UK first (as I am) I think he will garner better ticket sales from doing his show in Ramsay Street and Knots Landing before entering the UK for the summer festivals and assorted gigs that will get us in the UK, his strongest commercial market, all excited (ie better ticket sales)

    Having said that if he will play Mexico or South America I'm offski

    Isn't he 50 in 2009?
    Anonymous -- Friday October 31 2008, @12:25PM (#313668)
  • Or, to be honest, I'm out.

    I haven't been impressed with a Morrissey album (as opposed to odd tracks, b sides and singles, where there have been one or two gems) since the brilliant Vauxhall and I, and I'm on the point of giving up waiting for the late career masterpiece of which he is so clearly capable yet seemingly loathe to deliver.

    On the bright side, Skull, Mama, Farewell and My Dearest are all either good or excellent. Shame Is the Name is also a cool title.

    But - That's How People Grow Up was entirely diabolical, and I still hope for it not to be on the record, though I feel it will be.

    Also - Paris as lead single? Is this a good idea? It's pleasant, but not something that grabs you, unless the studio version far exceeds the live version (doubtful). Indeed, it seems rather mediocre for a lead single, somewhat akin to the just OK "Let Me Kiss You". Also, the lyrics are cliched by Morrissey's standards, and not especially clever.

    But I'll settle for Paris as lead provided Grow Up is ommitted - seriously, one of the worst Morrissey songs ever, with bad lyrics, a boring, uninspired musical backing and a failure to improve with the passing of time.

    Also, "Maladjusted" is largely shite and "Southpaw" not much better (though I like the demo of "Honey You Know Where To Find Me") - the press are going to have a field day with the release of those two.
    Anonymous -- Friday October 31 2008, @12:34PM (#313670)
  • You've skipped us the last few tours. It's been six years since you've played here. Come back!
    Anonymous -- Friday October 31 2008, @01:01PM (#313675)
  • now it'll probably a month and half until the next TTY update.

    Anonymous -- Friday October 31 2008, @01:12PM (#313677)
    • Agreed by Anonymous (Score:0) Friday October 31 2008, @02:55PM
  • Oh my God - it's so perfect that, that my baby changed his mind and, and rescheduled, playing here first. I am really really grateful. I love Morrissey so much. I'm just being a Drama Queen? -- It's not like that, it's not like that at all. It's true, it's true-I don't want anybody to tell me how to feel. And Morrissey means more than anybody to me in the whole wide world. I wish he sings Redondo Beach like a million times, well a lot at the accumulation of all the concerts I shall be going to. I know he didn't write it, but he turned Patti Smith's version of RB into what "was" ok, nothing special, by Patti Smith -- but , but Morrissey sings it like it's a "new" song. Pretty good. No--perfect. I've listened to it a million times and I still do, I do.

    Thank you again for the 1743, you'll never know how much it means to me.
    Kate2828 -- Friday October 31 2008, @01:27PM (#313679)
    (User #12664 Info | http://www.morrissey-solo.com/)
  • ammunition
    papa jack
    roy's keen
    ambitious outsiders
    alma matters
    satan rejected my soul
    trouble loves me
    sorrow will come in the end
    lost
    heir apparent
    the edges are no longer parallel
    now i am a was
    wide to receive
    he cried
    Anonymous -- Friday October 31 2008, @02:09PM (#313682)
  • Time to start saving my money!! damn. lenghty US tour, moz is gonna leave me broke D: !!!!

    Dior -- Friday October 31 2008, @02:17PM (#313685)
    (User #18985 Info)
    • Re:wow by Mr Sunshine (Score:1) Saturday November 01 2008, @02:49PM
  • I've lost a little interest in Moz, but I'm excited as hell for his new album and the next U.S. tour.

    He better come back to Nor Cal!!!!
    Mrs. Lovett -- Friday October 31 2008, @03:47PM (#313690)
    (User #20654 Info)
    "Who, being loved, is poor?"
  • i'm so excited to hear that mozzy will begin his tour here in the u.s. hopefully he'll kick it off here in l.a. i can't wait to see him!
    mademoiselle x -- Friday October 31 2008, @06:35PM (#313697)
    (User #21258 Info)
    • Re:fantastic! by shiftlessbody (Score:1) Friday October 31 2008, @07:44PM
    • Re:fantastic! by Anonymous (Score:0) Saturday November 01 2008, @08:21AM
      • Re:fantastic! by mademoiselle x (Score:1) Sunday November 02 2008, @10:30AM
        • Re:fantastic! by i'llsendyoumine (Score:1) Sunday November 02 2008, @12:57PM
    • Re:fantastic! by i'llsendyoumine (Score:1) Sunday November 02 2008, @05:32AM
  • As usual, the same relentless criticism of Moz. Releasing a new album, planning a major tour and virtually no one appreciates the fact that Moz owes them nothing, he could retire if he wanted; he has enough to live comfortably without a doubt and then no more tours, no more new material and then you can almost hear the gnashing of teeth then. How will you all fill your time then? Just how many times can you wake up in your own vomit knowing the highlight of your day is whether the mailman brings you your latest batch of meds and just how many pills you can inhale before he gets into his little car and drives off. Or whether the bugs that you see running across your wall at night are really bugs or the chipped paint chipping from your bedroom wall or are they really just illusions from the paint chipping from the wall that you see running.
    And yes I know all this and you are surprised but I can predict the future using my Ouija board using my penis to spell out the words. I just released air and the smell is intoxicating. You are envious of my many odors.
    I often like to put my skirt on and go to the local Shop-Rite and sneak up on the cashiers and bend over and release my bountiful odors upon them. I often go to the zoo and enclose my penis in yellow foam to have the gorillas peel me like a banana. Moz would understand.
    He would like you to go out tonight Trick or Treating and then stuff your fat faces with poison candy and he would like it even more that you won’t have to dress up as monsters because you so called fans are monsters. You don’t have to dress up. This is your holiday. enjoy it as it’s the only time you people leave your houses cause you can’t leave your houses.
    There is doo doo stains on my sheets and I think they were put there by aliens who came to steal one of my three remaining hairs. But I will wait for them with my anus pointing up to release my odorfull air in their faces which will stun them.
    The children are knocking on my door now and I horrify them by giving them a penny instead of candy, this is because I am a cheap fat fuck and I don’t know how to share. I like to hoard my snickers bars all to myself. I have already consumed two bags of snickers in the last two hours. I will soon open my M&M’s and if the rest of the children are lucky, I will be so kind as to give them the brown ones. I hate children, they are whiny little concoctions that serve no purpose just like you people. I called my psychic today and was on the phone with Ms Butterworth for 2 hours at $.99/minute. She told me that Moz made me obsolete. I don’t want to be obsolete. My psychic told me that this was due to my drawing pentagrams in the grass and calling upon Satan to solve my problems. Tonight for dinner I ate two steak sandwiches and I am saving the raw meet that is left over for my next spell. The Seroquil that I am taking for the last 21/2 years has made me gain 92 pounds. I told my shrink this today and he told me to up my milligrams to 800/day. He said this will help me lose the weight. I hope he is right because my bf won’t go near me. He says that my weight is a turnoff. and that my penis has shriveled up. I must go now and check out the gay men’s chat room so hopefully I can meet up with a new prospect tonight. I must go now as it’s time for my next dose of Seroquil.
    Why is there a sock in my mouth every time I take Seroquil.
    Happy Halloween. I hope you all choke on your tampered candies.. I holler.
    Anonymous -- Friday October 31 2008, @08:50PM (#313703)
  • Jesus!
    modegrrl -- Friday October 31 2008, @09:15PM (#313705)
    (User #19494 Info)
    Everyday is like Sunday, everyday is silent and gray
  • i really hope Kit finally is released here. it is a great song & i really want to hear the version described by Boz
    devoted101 -- Saturday November 01 2008, @11:06AM (#313716)
    (User #10724 Info)
  • I can not wait for this album to leak out on the internet. I don't even care if its a lousy sounding version. As for the first single, well it's not a bad song, but it's a bad single to start an album. I was thinking he would start out with "Something is squeezing my soul". Like someone else said hopefully the studio version is so much better. And for those cutting on Maladjusted, I personally think 'Maladjusted' the song was his last truly lyrically charged song. The song itself is like a book. Remember when Moz used to be very descriptive with his songs and use more than three words that he repeated over and over and over. The songs aren't bad either I just don't think Mercury gave it any attention. Look at the awful cover.
    Anonymous -- Saturday November 01 2008, @05:19PM (#313732)
  • I know the majority of people who come here have a limited intelligence and seems most apparent with the one liners, saying this post is lame or this person is on crack. Such intelligence, so clever. But when you only bring a vocabulary in the single digits to the table then one can’t expect too much, now can one?
    Not that it matters with relentless criticism of Moz and whatever he attempts. Of course begging the question why are you here? What purpose can it serve to constantly complain? Yes I know it’s Moz’s fault for your sad lives. Yes it’s his fault you can’t rise above a street sweeper. It’s his fault every relationship you’ve ever had ends when your bf finds you cooking your crack meth in the bathtub and then explodes in your face and blows your homes up and then you’re on the news. It’s Moz’s fault that you have to spend each evening battling the rats over the cheese dinner cooking beneath the sofa. It’s Moz’s fault that your shrink has you on so many meds that you might as well call yourself a pharmacy, I mean most of you surely weigh enough to be a baboon. Most of you are piglets and roll around in your own feces while whacking off to your numerous porn sites that we all know you download every night. You know the ones I mean, the “free” ones, you cheap train wrecks of your concocted no oxygen to the brain selves. That’s also Moz’s fault and while you are at it let’s blame the war in Iraq on Moz and the recession as well being that you are all such brainiacs.
    Yes it’s Moz’s fault that you get these headaches because you like to spend your evenings racing head first across the room ramming your head into the wall in a vain attempt to kill an imaginary spider that in your drugged up stupor you imagined your saw. He caused the recession and for gas prices to skyrocket and for groceries to be so expensive and for the Stock crash too. Why don’t you blame Moz for all of your houses being foreclosed on. I know things because you supported Bush’s plan regarding the foreclosure of houses and his false promises to get Americans their homes back. The one thing that astounds me is that he’s not been accused of working with Bin Laden yet. I’m sure you’ll blame him if McCain gets voted in as well. Retraction as most of you are probably Republicans from what you lot write. Moz knows, he caused it all with all his touring and releasing of new material. Yes he caused all that stress for you having that gun at your head making you buy or listen to anything he puts out. How dare Moz do this to you. Doesn’t he know that he should be calling each and every one of you and asking you all for career advice especially seeing the dreck and wreck that you’ve turned your own lives into.
    My psychic has told me all this. I pay $.99/minute so Ms Jamima could tell me that there are demons in my head and if I set my 3 hairs on fire that I will kill them. I often put my penis in the microwave so my urine will come out hot and steamy like soup. I holler. I like to open my window and stick my butt out the window so I can rain down my doody pellets on the Moz fans. Ms Jamima also said that the lemon Jell-O in my refrigerator is my master and I should smear it all over my genitals and then freeze it in the freezer until it become a lemon icicle. I think Ms Jamima is well worth my 1000 dollars I spend monthly on these psychic lines.
    Now a pigeon just flew in my window and took a crap on my head, so I must go wash my 3 hairs off.
    So yes your sad pathetic existence is all Moz’s fault and yes maybe finally when you tie that belt around your neck and climb on that chair and go swinging one last time from the shower rod, then when the priest is regurgitating out his eulogy, really there will be nothing more he’ll have to say than it was Moz’s fault you took that swing. Though given the level of trash inhabiting this site, “blame” for that, at least, one imagines, Moz will be glad to accept.
    Anonymous -- Saturday November 01 2008, @07:07PM (#313735)
  • If the album is out in late February then most magazines will need to review it in their Feb issue, which means that there'll be review copies kicking around any time from mid-November for deadline purposes.

    So I think we can expect True To You to confirm a tracklisting for YOR in the next few weeks and the likelihood of on-line leaks any time from December.

    So we shouldnt bicker about where he is or isnt touring for now and be glad that the new record is finally here.

    The Southpaw and Maladjusted reissues will probably be ignored in context of the new album, and maybe this is a good thing. Either way 2009 is going to be a big year for Morrissey (he'll be 50!) and a great year for fans.
    Anonymous -- Sunday November 02 2008, @04:34AM (#313747)
  • Firstly I think the new album is exciting however sine he has been living in america his lyrics and inspirations have completely gone wrong, all you american fans have completley destroyed him!!! you all get on my nerves-i think unless you are English/British then you don't have much of an idea of him at all. And you go on about him as if he is your own. I am pleased for the re-issues, a few improvements to iron some career errors. I would like him to completley re-record Kill Uncle with a different sound like how it was toured.
    i also think it's a shame he is touring america so much, i think they had their fair share last year. i also think he needs to move back to at least europe and try to get back his credibilty/dignity.
    i also think half the people on here are out of their minds, moaning on and on and on.
    that kate 2828 is bonkers, and because of all your wrong spelling it's thankfully very easy to spot who the US posters are so, as they are quite often mad too!!!

                 
    Anonymous -- Sunday November 02 2008, @06:12AM (#313753)
  • It feels right that the release is February after some time to allow for Moz and all close to the production of Years of Refusal some time to mourn Jerry and figure the best way to honor him. I imagine it might be hard at first to tour the album, but us loving fans (wherever we are...whatever we are) will be there to share in the joy of the latest work. It will be an experience, perhaps emotional, for some of us, too, considering we're just sympathetic or empathetic that way. So maybe there are some good reasons Moz's doing the US first (just conjecture, but maybe to perform it for the circles of people influenced and catapulted by Jerry's partnership with them in their own music careers). For New Zealanders and Aussies, this also means by the time he arrives down under, he and the boyz will be really tight with performing the songs and putting on an even better show for you ("always look on the bright side of life...").

    I'm so looking forward to Paris being released as a single (I remember seeing some posts begging for that a while back). It will be great to hear the b-sides, especially a new collaboration with Chrissie Hynde.
       
    romeogirl -- Monday November 03 2008, @12:17AM (#313786)
    (User #2891 Info)
  • but all of Morrissey's 21st century work has had a shelf-life of no more than a year or so.

    when YATQ arrived iwas excited- as we all were- and iwas convinced that, while there were problems, there were also enough redeeming qualities to out-weight these problems. a year or so on- after the initial excitement had faded- iwas left with a hollow sounding record riddled with problems with only a few glimmers.

    then ROTT came along and iimmediately could tell that it was better than YATQ in terms of its lyrics and production. the excitement of a new release was more quickly dampened this time by Moz' foolish boycott of Canada, but still ifelt that ROTT might be the first great Morrissey record in over a decade. sadly, this feeling was again short-lived iwas left with another Morrissey record that simply did not resonate the way he used to.

    above everything else, it seems its the sheer laziness and lack of effort that permeates through Morrissey's music now that robs it of having any lasting impression. even the relatively good songs seem more like clever ideas instead of heart-felt pieces of art. he tries to make up for this by bellowing out every song, even the quieter ballads- there is no more subtlety or softness in his work.

    since hearing the last two horrid singles and hearing clips of some of the new material, idont hold much hope for the new album either. the re-releases of SG and Maladjusted might be half way interesting, but iwll not be getting foolishly excited again as idid in '04 and '06- Morrissey's time has long since past.
    chrisarclark <[email protected]> -- Monday November 03 2008, @08:46AM (#313798)
    (User #9259 Info)
    "I'm just passing through here on my way to somewhere civilized and maybe I'll even arrive, maybe I'll even arrive..."
  • Wow! Great news!

    Roll on UK gigs. Maybe the end of 2009??

    Can't wait for the new album.
    Anonymous -- Monday November 03 2008, @10:25AM (#313803)
  • That is a weak, weak song. If that's what he is using to launch the album I can guarantee it will flop and sell probably less than Malajusted, which at LEAST had Alma Matters, a far better single.

    Throwing my Arms Around Paris is so bad - he's lost it. Tony the Pony would've been a better single!
    Anonymous -- Monday November 03 2008, @11:50AM (#313809)
  • So that Moz puts out 15 to 18 songs every year or so has no meaning? it’s all about quality, of course quality as defined by you. That even if five to seven of his new songs meet your standards after all these years, that unacceptable; that even those five songs are five more than you would have had is unacceptable. You’d rather Moz just vanish for seven years and just pop back out like a weasel when his money runs low with a new album and tour? No, his constant records, these awful ones you hate are the reason he can tour and has the support for a tour so he can play all those old gems you love so. But that’s not good enough. You want a rehash of the same songs, meeting your quality, not seeing that some good songs are better than none and this keeps the tours going that many after all these years have given up on.
    But you want him to be 20 again and write like he’s 20 again. Unfortunately his age unlike your IQ did not remain stuck in the 20s. And you want him to stay the same and write the same and be the same just because your life is the same empty battered drugged up delirium it’s been for 20 years. Yank that needle from your arm, stop french kissing the subway wino to get those tasty drops of whisky from his lips and stop pretending your skateboard is a car when you go to the local mission for Sunday dinner.
    For you see, I know what has happened. The caterpillar who lives amongst my 3 hairs upon my head has told me all. Except it, face it. I holler. My psychic Aunt Jamima, the former slave, told me I should go put my penis in the toilet and flush it so it can go for a ride. I like to sneak up on my Arabian neighbor Jesus and place my big toe in his anus, He then calls me his little chickadee in Spanish but I don’t speak Spanish so maybe not. I holler.
    Mike Joyce is dj-ing at the local YMCA and I enjoy going to urinate in the hat he places on the floor for donations.
    Aunt Jamima has told me that I’m experiencing transference with my shrink since I have the desire to rub his balls upon my balding head and allow him to probe me with his pipe. I sometimes like to utilize his bathroom to release a heaping steaming gigantic bowl of doody in the sink to mark my territory. My shrink gets mad at me then, sometimes, maybe until I pay him and then he stops. I pay him and leave a doody pellet amongst the bills so he can complete his doody necklace he’s building. I holler.
    I want to ride my green tricycle in the rain while going to the local pub. Due to my weight problem I often tip over en route and it takes 5 men, 3 horses, and a gay baboon to pull me back up again.
    I often like to drop things outside my ex gf’s door so she can find them. I know things. She knows things. Then I stamp around so she is startled and then I sneak and creep out so she is confused at my doings. I do this because I’m evil and the voice in my head have commanded me to terrorize her.
    There are inane animals whirling around in my head tonight. I want to be the big cheese at my job. Why is there animal crackers floating around in my soup. Why can’t you find your phone? You call your toes. Today I ate my ex gf’s Magda’s mail. I crumpled up her cell phone bill and put it in my mouth. I knocked on her door and when she opened I, I just stood there with her mail crumpled up in my mouth with a sullen look on my face. When I take my meds, I get a mask like face. It is a side effect. Then I saw what looked like a Vicadin on her floor so I immediately grabbed it wasn’t looking because I like to eat things off the floor. I want to have germs on my pills. I like them. It brings me merriment. There are cockroaches in my telephone. What is all that static.
    I must go now as my Arabian neighbor is knocking at my door yelling at me in Spanish that I should lower my music but I don’t speak Spanish so I will ignore him. A snake just crawled out of my AC and I am fearful. My neighbor must have put it there because I wouldn’t let him give me a blowjob. I have to find my feet. I holler.
    Anonymous -- Monday November 03 2008, @10:49PM (#313838)
  • Like most posts above, I know everything and can predict the future.
    Anonymous -- Tuesday November 04 2008, @04:28AM (#313839)
    • Re:Hello by goinghome (Score:1) Tuesday November 04 2008, @11:30AM
  • It’s a wonderment that so few seem truly excited that Moz is coming out with another new release and planning to spend most of 2009 touring.
    All one reads is criticism of his singles selection, his song choices, his band, his writing, even where he lives or doesn’t. Moz and his career is like your personal doctors that you go to religiously every month to obtain your medicine but they do nothing for you by the likes of you.
    Why should he even bother trying? Why even release anything new or put out all the b-sides and tour as much as he does playing all the old standards you all crave so much. I’m sure when he thinks about having fans such as you people I’m sure he wonders this too.
    I know this is true. I get images and see things and saw the image of Moz on a potato and he was crying. I went to a fortune teller today and she read her crystal ball and told me that all this was true, she also said I have to send her $200 every month so she can burn candles for me to get me promoted to be the big cheese at my job. For another $50 dollars a month, Laura told me that she would try to turn my gay tendencies away because I’m ashamed of being a gay man. All of the gay men that I meet turn out to be unemployed, uneducated drug addicts trying to push me into smuggling drugs. I am against drugs. This is why you should say no to drugs. I just took my evening dose of Seroquel and three Klonopon. In one hour it shall be time for my Soma.
    I rushed home to call my psychic Aunt Jamima, the former runaway slave, but before I got to my door I was interrupted by my Arabian gardener neighbor who rushed over to me flailing his arms and speaking in Spanish and pointing to the semen that I ejaculated from my penis and left it for him to entice him to come over for a booty call. I like being a top. It makes me feel powerful. It makes me feel important. Unlike my job where no matter how much I try they won’t promote me to the big cheese of the company. I deserve to be the big cheese. I do everything everybody asks of me and i’m told by my both i’m overly compliant. I love my job. I’m so excited I will wake up to scurry in anticipation to get to my desk. That’s what heaven is. I am doubled over in agony over the thought of the weekend whereby I have to stay home where I kill my time by engaging in conversation with men on other gay porn sites. We look at each other through our web cams. You should try it. I don’t speak Spanish so I just said you’re welcome and went inside.
    I thought I was hearing voices again so I called my shrink to tell him but he put me on hold for 45 minutes but then I realized I wasn’t going crazy and hearing voices as it was just my goldfish Ernie was talking to me again and trying to convince me I should stick my penis into the fish tank so he could suck on it which made me feel all warm and tingly and swishy feeling of a goldfish sucking on my manhood. I want to put my penis into a bowl of mashed potatoes and mixed it. Also I like to stick my penis in the phone and jerk off there. Ya dig? I tried but I couldn’t fit as my head got stuck in the toilet so I took advantage of this to flush it 3 times as it was time for my monthly shampoo. I don’t know why I bother as I only have three hairs so I save money on shampoo.
    The shrink finally called me back and told me that whatever meds I was taking needed to be doubled. I told him they don’t help but he said the drug company had just bribed him with another trip to Bermuda so he had quotas to achieve and I needed to comply as usual.
    I hear sirens so I rushed outside to see the donut munchers in hot pursuit of a dunkin donuts delivery truck. I rushed over to them and explained how my goldfish wanted to kill me but they ignored me and then my Arabian neighbor came rushing over again bellowing in Spanish about my semen soup I’d left him - I couldn’t understand a word he said not knowing Spanish so I just said yes I am gay and would enjoy giving him a rattle and removing his diaper bouncing him on my lap. I holler
    Mike Joyce just rolled by on his skateboard w
    Anonymous -- Tuesday November 04 2008, @08:12PM (#313866)
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