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X-Ray magazine (Aug.) on the recent Morrissey
posted by davidt on Monday July 28 2003, @08:00AM

 spawned monster writes:

In the August edition of X-Ray magazine (radio station Xfm's music mag) I came across this:

Entitled Movement of the Month, with a crude cut and paste job of Moz's head on a boxer - "Spurred on by the recent TV documentary, Morrissey: Muscles, Tattoos and Men on Mopeds, or whatever it was called, and perky publicity on the back of his new compilation, Party on E with Mozza, young music fans and beer guts across Britain have once again been discussing Morrissey. Well and truly gone is the gladioli-waving, pale-skinned weed of yore, now replaced by the ex-pugilist type living in L.A. To be a Morrissey fan, 2003, follow these guidelines: Sit in the sun whenever it's out. Join the T.A, for the strength, and do 60 chin-ups every morning. Gurn like a bare-knuckle fighter when quizzed about your sexuality. Spend £30 a day on posh shaves at a celeb barber. Buy a Hollywood mansion and sleep in the room Clark Gable used to shag in. Secretly listen to ragga through an ipod. Ride a Vespa without a helmet, cos it's hard. Tell The Thrills they're great and get a load of free press off it. Hang out with tough latino youths and tell them you 'understand their plight'. Do not offer to buy them a meat burrito."

Well I didn't like that one bit. Bastards.

 
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    X-Ray magazine (Aug.) on the recent Morrissey | Log in/Create an Account | Top | 36 comments | Search Discussion
    Threshold:
    The Fine Print: The following comments are owned by whoever posted them. We are not responsible for them in any way.
    well.... (Score:0)
    well i quite enjoyed it!
    especially the bit about gurning. how true. :)
    mrbleepbleep -- Monday July 28 2003, @08:05AM (#69872)
    (User #4268 Info)
    • Re:well.... by SundownPlayboy (Score:1) Monday July 28 2003, @08:53AM
      Hateful article! (Score:0, Redundant)
      This 'article' is absolutely vile! It made no sense whatsoever. People change and grow. It is a very rude commentary about Morrissey- filled with gross exaggerations. Morrissey is still Morrissey.

      How hateful! Yes, Morrissey moved to LA. That does not mean he has 'sold-out.' He still spends a great deal of time in Ireland. Drug-free is the only choice that matters.

      And the part about tripping on 'E'-? I cannot see anyone *still* doing that. Drugs are no longer fashionable! Healthy living is 'in.'

      The crude remarks about Morrissey's sexuality and Latino youth were dispicable. Bad journalism. I wish people would either be nice or leave Morrissey alone.
      sycophantic_slag -- Monday July 28 2003, @09:40AM (#69885)
      (User #3940 Info)
       "And I just can't explain/ So I won't even try to."
      I laughed so hard ... (Score:0)
      I thought I'd plotz. Hi-fucking-larious!
      Anonymous -- Monday July 28 2003, @10:00AM (#69887)
        Spot on! (Score:3, Funny)
        Everything mentioned in this article is exactly like me,except i do wear a helmet.
        tchatshm -- Monday July 28 2003, @10:03AM (#69889)
        (User #7211 Info)
         let`s go and trip a dwarf!
        • Re:Spot on! by English Martyr (Score:1) Tuesday July 29 2003, @02:42AM
          lol (Score:1)
          well i thought it was hilarious! spot on!

          GD
          Northern Bird -- Monday July 28 2003, @12:09PM (#69901)
          (User #4363 Info)
           no longer drowning...
          • Re:lol by Anonymous (Score:0) Monday July 28 2003, @01:28PM
            haha..ohhh (Score:3, Insightful)
            I don't think anybody should waste time getting offended when Morrissey probably (even if he was aware of it) couldn't give a ten-benson. He is after all very well-endowed in the moz-art's of retorts and come-back jibes, if you're not used to Morrissey taking some (veggie) pasty by now then you never will be. The positive being he evokes a reaction in just about everybody, generally not a good one...but he must love it all the same. I mean all these years later and he's still getting on peoples tits, there is no such thing as a moz-proof bra....he tweaks a nipple in all and sundry, critics and fans a-like. I'll back the bugger up anytime but he does need a grilling now and again, he is only human after all, as he mentioned some time ago in a certain song. Morrissey's at his best when he has a point to prove or a score to settle, load the lyrical (craig) cannons....the verbal big-gun is putting on his smokin' jacket and coming out to light up the hit parade again, for that i'm truly grateful! Now what was that muso journalists name again........????!

            Retards,
            'Kes Lynam' in his favourite wax jacket! x
            FRED UP -- Monday July 28 2003, @01:18PM (#69909)
            (User #3917 Info)
              other things to be in 2003 (Score:1)
              signed to a record label
              be the head of your own label
              record an album
              go on tour.
              suzanne -- Monday July 28 2003, @03:25PM (#69920)
              (User #36 Info | http://www.myspace.com/snootywriter )
               I scare dead people.
                hahaha (Score:2, Funny)
                Two Thumbs Up!

                Someone finally says it like it is.
                broccoli_spears -- Monday July 28 2003, @06:06PM (#69930)
                (User #3308 Info)
                 We don't do crack. We don't do that. Crack is whack. - Whitney Houston
                • Re:hahaha by Anonymous (Score:0) Tuesday July 29 2003, @09:02AM
                  • Re:hahaha by broccoli_spears (Score:1) Tuesday July 29 2003, @09:30PM
                  Upset? (Score:2, Insightful)
                  Is it really worth getting angry over? The writer writes for a *radio station magazine* -- have some sympathy for the failure of his career.

                  There were some funny bits, though. And the poster who said Moz needs to be grilled once in a while is right. At least it's an up-to-date grilling, instead of all the "pope of mope" shite.
                  king leer -- Monday July 28 2003, @09:34PM (#69946)
                  (User #80 Info)
                  • Re:Upset? by Anonymous (Score:0) Saturday August 09 2003, @03:06AM
                    fuzzy sends his take regarding nutrition.... (Score:0, Troll)
                    Dear Jim,

                    Also tell them not to serve fried chicken...or collard greens...or whatever the hell they serve!

                    Sincerely,

                    Fuzzy Zoeller

                    P.S. What kind of meat is in that burrito?
                    Jim Rome -- Tuesday July 29 2003, @02:27AM (#69952)
                    (User #720 Info | http://www.jimrome.com/ )
                     ...and how?
                    Not funny ... (Score:1)
                    enough said.
                    English Martyr -- Tuesday July 29 2003, @02:45AM (#69954)
                    (User #655 Info | http://website.lineone.net/~smilingontim/timstwin.htm )
                    Wey-hey! (Score:1)
                    This really is very, very funny!
                    KrisV -- Wednesday July 30 2003, @05:34AM (#70062)
                    (User #998 Info)
                      Gurn your life! (Score:1)
                      Well, somewthing made me laugh today. Thanks.
                      and2rew -- Wednesday July 30 2003, @12:44PM (#70091)
                      (User #8232 Info)
                        This article makes me very sad! (Score:0)
                        This article makes me very sad. Us Morrissey fans have to be taken seriously!!
                        I think I'll go and mope in a darkened room for a while and put on some Morrissey B-sides to try and cheer me up.

                        On second thoughts, I think I'll put on Likin Park and get pissed! Wahey!
                        Anonymous -- Thursday July 31 2003, @06:59AM (#70146)
                        It's true! Moz does listen to ragga.... (Score:0)
                        It's true, Moz does listen to ragga through his iPod. Apparently that's going to be the direction of the new album.
                        Alan is going to be the warm-up MC, Boz will be tinkling the ivories and Sly & Robbie with be the back-up.
                        It's going to be called "Irish Heart, Jamaican Soul.....Irie" and will have Moz on the cover with a whopping great big joint.
                        Anonymous -- Thursday July 31 2003, @08:09PM (#70286)

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